Sigourney Weaver movies.
Wall-E
She voices the ship’s computer.
*Galaxy Quest/I]
When did she get breasts?
Ghostbusters
Gracious hostess to Zuul, right?
Next: John Candy movies
John Candy movies
Stripes
“A lean, mean, fightin’ machine!”
Planes, Trains & Automobiles
“My hand’s between two pillows…”
Uncle Buck
“Did you brush your teeth?”
Next: Famous actors in posthumously released films.
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
Olivier appeared via poor CGI.
Gladiator
Oliver Reed counseled hero Maximus.
The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
Heath Ledger impersonated by others.
Next: Tom Cruise movies before 1995.
Tom Cruise movies before 1995:
Risky Business:
He’s a pimp, face it.
Cocktail:
And where is it now?
Rain Man:
He’s out-acted by Dustin Hoffman.
Next: John Cleese movies.
A Fish Called Wanda
Barrister goes rogue; gets girl.
The Life of Brian
Whistle just won’t stop stoning.
The Holy Grail
Cleese: Frenchman with outraaaaaaageous accent.
Next: Uma Thurman movies.
Uma Thurman movies.
Pulp Fiction
“Was that an uncomfortable silence?”
Gattaca
Show me your genes, please.
Kill Bill: Vol. I
Desaturated colors! Curse you, MPAA!!!
Next: Ethan Hawke movies.
Ethan Hawke movies.
Hamlet
To be or not, Ethan?
Dead Poets Society
The play’s the thing, Ethan.
Gattaca
He’s not who he seems.
Next: Drew Barrymore movies.
Drew Barrymore movies.
Donnie Darko
What the fuck’s going on?
Firestarter
Evil government kidnaps pyromaniac girl.
Motorama
Nobody’s EVER watched this. Pity.
Next: Jake Gyllenhaal movies.
** Jake Gyllenhaal movies**
The Day After Tomorrow
Surprisingly decent Roland Emmerich film.
Source Code
Truly heaven or an alternate timeline?
Brokeback Mountain
Pissed off many homophobes worldwide.
Next: Movies penned by Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman
Cowboys & Aliens
High concept but dumb movie.
Star Trek
Kirk, Spock venture forth again.
Mission Impossible III
Ethan, wife need to talk.
Next: Virginia Madsen movies.
**Virginia Madsen movies. **
Highlander II: The Quickening
Should have been only one.
Hot to Trot
Bobcat and talking horse? Awesome!
Sideways
Wine snobs contemplate their lives
Next: Roddy Roddy Piper movies
Roddy Roddy Piper movies:
They Live!
Kicks ass and chews bubblegum!
Immortal Combat
Mortal Combat on Sci-Fi Channel
Terminal Rush
Not Joseph Gordon-Levitt bike flick
Remakes of 1980 scifi classics
Remakes of 1980 scifi classics
Robocop
Verhoeven’s greatest can’t be replaced.
Star Trek into Darkness
Remake of “Wrath of Khan”.
Super 8
E.T. without Steven Spielberg’s magic.
Next: Remakes Of 1980’s Horror Classics.
Remakes Of 1980’s Horror Classics.
The Fog
No Adrienne Barbeau; no good.
The Evil Dead
No Bruce Campbell; no good.
The Howling: Reborn
Never mind who; no good.
Next: Shirley Temple movies.
The Littlest Rebel
She meets Lincoln, for chrissakes!
Heidi
Forever notorious for football preemption.
A Kiss for Corliss
Her last film, in 1949.
Next: William Hurt movies.
William Hurt Movies
Lost in Space
As dated as the show.
Dark City
A pure noir mind f***.
The Incredible Hulk
There’ll never be a sequel.
Next: Edward Norton Movies
Edward Norton Movies
The People vs. Larry Flynt
Real Flynt played hanging judge.
American History X
Derek’s kind of a jerk.
Fight Club
Don’t talk about this movie!
Next: Helena Bonham Carter movies.
Helena Bonham Carter movies
Sweeney Todd
Hey, she doesn’t sing badly.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part II
Never threaten a mother’s kids.
Fight Club
Not directed by Tim Burton.
Next: Movies with dragons
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
Plucky Bilbo almost gets crisped.
Reign of Fire
Dragons rule over ruined England.
Eragon
Sucky movie, critics unanimously said.
Next: Movies with an “x” somewhere in the title.
Movies with an “x” somewhere in the title.
The Fox and the Hound
Some friendships deteriorate over time.
Jason X
Should’ve stopped at the first.
Rumble in the Bronx
Jackie Chan takes on Canadians.
Next: Movies Scored By John Williams.