Five-Word Movie Review

Yul Brynner movies:

The King and I:
Charming musical about Leonowens’ experience.

The Magnificent Seven:
Western based on “Seven Samurai.”

Westworld:
Western; Brynner’s a robotic cowboy.

Next: Dystopian-future movies.

Blade Runner
Deckard discovers his essential humanity.

Terminator
John Connor’s future really sucks, huh?

Cloud Atlas
Future Korea: Clones are slaves.

Next: Zooey Deschanel movies.

Bridge To Terabithia
Not about a fantasy world.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy
Good part, but flawed movie.

Elf
She’s got those beautiful eyes.
Next: Candice Bergen films

The Group
Her screen debut, in 1966

2010: The Year We Make Contact
Computer voice as “Olga Mallsnerd”

A Friggin’ Christmas Miracle
Sorry, is her next film

Next: Alan Arkin movies.

Alan Arkin movies.

The Last Unicorn
Hilarious and touching as Schmendrick.

Catch-22
Hilarious and touching as Yossarian.

Little Miss Sunshine
Hilarious and touching as Grandpa.

(I love me some Arkin! He was also just plain hilarious, but not especially touching, in So I Married An Axe Murderer.)

Next: Films starring bands other than the Beatles

Head
The Monkees spearheaded this flop.

Rock ‘N’ Roll High School
Hilarious hijinks with the Ramones.

This Is Spinal Tap
Masterwork mockumentary of metal greats.

Next: Films of Gene Kelly.

Singin’ in the Rain
Famous wet scene still beloved.

An American in Paris
Thought it ran too long.

Xanadu
Still my favorite review: “Xanadon’t.”

Next: Films of Ellen Barkin

Films of Ellen Barkin:

Ocean’s Thirteen:
She’s perfect in her role.

Switch:
Another eighties body swapping movie.

Diner:
Levinson directs an ensemble cast.

Next: Movies about horse racing.

Hidalgo
Aragorn rides for the prize.

Charlie Chan at the Race Track
Murder mystery, now non PC.

National Velvet
Liz Taylor rides The Pie.

Next: Movies about TV.

Movies about TV

Quiz Show
True story about historic scandal.

Wayne’s World
Public access cable - how 80s!

Anchorman
“Go fuck yourself, San Diego!” :smiley:

Next: Movies where a character unsuccessfully attempts suicide.

Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle:
Tries, fails, writes funny poem.

The End:
That’s the whole movie plot.

Million Dollar Baby:
Tries to bite off tongue.
Next: films with a disabled character actually played by a person with the disability.

The Best Years of Our Lives
Wounded former soldier won Oscar.

Freaks
“One of us,” they chanted.

Lincoln
Wounded vets played Union casualties.

Next: Cate Blanchett movies

Cate Blanchett movies

The Aviator
Cate does a fantastic Kate.

The Fellowship of the Ring
Tall, gorgeous, creepy: yep, Galadriel!

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Cate couldn’t save this dreck.

Next: Helena Bonham Carter movies wherein she does not wear a bodice.

The King’s Speech
Duchess of York, then Queen.

Fatal Deception
Played Oswald’s bewildered, scared widow.

The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
Delightful comic turn as noblewoman.

Next: David Duchovny movies.

Chaplin
Charlie steals him from Sennett.

Kalifornia
Brad Pitt wants him dead.

Working Girl
Fun romp with Melanie Griffith.
Next: Films set in New England.

Children of a Lesser god:
Governor Baxter school in Maine.

Way Down East:
Connecticut is “down” up there.

Jaws:
“Amity” is fake Martha’s Vineyard.
Next: films with long steady-cam scenes

All worth a look for anyone who loves movies!:

Children of Men
Ambush of car is amazing.

Atonement
Chillingly realistic, tragic Dunkirk beach.

Russian Ark
Centuries of Russian history evoked.

Next: Edward Woodward movies.

Hot Fuzz
Old people want perfect town.

King David
Edward’s Saul wants David dead.

A Christmas Carol
Woodward’s Ghost of Christmas Present

Next: Bernadette Peters movies.

The Longest Yard
She was the warden’s secretary!

The Jerk
Sorry, not nearly funny enough.

Heartbeeps
Andy Kaufman apologized for it.

Next: Frank Sinatra movies.

Frank Sinatra movies:

Guys and Dolls:
He’s good old reliable Nathan!

Von Ryan’s Express:
Train escapes Nazis; Sinatra leads.

Ocean’s 11:
Rat Pack robs Las Vegas.

Next: Beach Party Movies.