Our busy season (about like April 15 for tax professionals, but it lasts for several months) starts the first week of January. Christmas has been nothing but a pain in the ass since I started the job many years ago.
I think Santa slept with someone’s girl… 
Thanks for reminding me to put on the Christmas music, of which I have tons. In fact I think I’m gonna have a rum and eggnog right now as I listen to the start of my marathon Christmas collection. Yes, there is fresh eggnog in the fridge. 'Tis the season.
P.S.- If you’re interested, my Christmas shopping is all done. In fact, my Christmas shopping is all done even if you’re not interested. 
P.P.S.- Yes, thank you, anticipating your delightful response, I believe I will fuck right off. Santa can continue to piss in your corn flakes, which I assume he must have been doing all year to bring on this tirade.
It’s not cynicism to cringe at the endless assault of the sticky, icky combination of commercialism and sentimentality. If there weren’t dollars to be made by the endless smashing assault, when we hear the bells for midnight mass we would be saying to ourselves “Oh, is it Christmas already?”
I agree with the OP 100%.
Stop right there motherfucker. Don’t pit eggnog. Super stuff.
In the spirit of the season though I’ll join your rant. Fuck Christmas for relegating one of the best tasting beverage to a seasonal novelty beverage. WTF??
If I’m going to go into a diabetic coma I want it to be from eggnog not from some crap Dr Thunder or other hideous vehicle to get sugar into my system but no, if it’s not December I can just fuck off. I don’t get it. I understand it will never become anyone’s staple drink but at least keep a row of it somewhere in some store. I can pick up circus peanuts 12 months a year. It doesn’t make sense.
[Here is where I expect others to chime in how off base I am and that I can indeed get it all year round and tell me I’ve been doing it wrong and tell me where to buy it out of season…please]
A bunch of lazy shitstains, you can defend it anyway you want but it’s pure laziness.
Around here half the people in the malls around this time (from my few as possible visits) are very likely not Christians. Yet still they spend.
It’s not like the merry merchants don’t try to boost the spending for Valentines Day, Presidents Day, Memorial Day, and Millard Fillmore’s birthday.
One thing I am grateful to my Jehovah’s Witnesses background for. No Christmas obligations for me! Yay!
And the critics always list ‘no Christmas’ as a bad thing when excoriating the Witness faith. Hah!
Since “Christmas” has become a mega-jumbled amalgamation of holidays, I’ve always thought that Christians should celebrate the birthday of baby Jesus in the spring when, supposedly, he was born. Have it on a Sunday, maybe a month before or after Easter. Decorate with manger scenes and play all the religious songs. Then they and the rest of us can celebrate the winter holiday (originally Solstice/Yule) on Dec. 21 and have all the Santas, trees, snowflake decorations, cutesy songs and presents anyone desires.
I do hate that the “season” lasts for months. One of my neighbors put up Christmas decorations after they took down their Halloween decorations, which had been up since Labor Day. You might as well change the names of November and December to 1Christmas and 2Christmas.
And Jesus was most likely born in August or September anyway.
My childhood Christmas memories consist of my mother telling us that she didn’t want anything, and that mommies don’t get presents anyway, and then stomping around the house all day blubbering because SHE DIDN’T GET ANYTHING except from her own mother. And when we were old enough to disregard this, she would say “I don’t want this junk!” and destroy it before the day was out.
I have found out that my experience is not unique. 
Yeah, I appreciate the folks who never take down (and sometimes don’t even unplug) the Christmas lights. Christmas lights rock.
The thing I most agree with regarding the OP: Who the fuck buys someone a car for Christmas? I don’t like people picking out clothes for me, much less a car.
Second place: Fuck eggnog. It’s the nastiest way to get drunk, ever.
Eh, I’m not religious, but growing up I always had a pretty good time at Christmas, so I go the secular version every year. Off to set up my crappy, 3 1/2 foot, 15-buck -from-Big-Lots plastic Christmas tree.
My favorite true wacky Christmas story: I am a Jewish agnostic who is a giant choir geek, as are many of my oldest friends. We have gone Christmas caroling every year for more than 30 years. We do traditional old carols, for the most part. Our M.O. is to pick houses where it looks like people are home and might enjoy some carolers: decorations, lights on, etc. We walk up to the house and start singing while we ring the doorbell, and if anyone answers the door, we take requests. Usually if people are home, they are delighted to see us: we get people taking phone videos, offers of charitable donations, cookies, booze, etc.
One year the weather was particularly disgusting, but we slogged along anyway. Eventually the frozen slush got the better of us, and we decided we’d do one more house and then go inside for some hot chocolate. We saw a house decorated with holly and garlands and a huge tree in the front window. Launching into something deeply religious like “Good King Wenceslas,” one of us rang the doorbell.
Eventually a man answers and stands there scowling while we finish our song. We ask if he has any requests, and he asked what made us think that he was a Christian who might be interested in caroling. “Ummm, the lights and decorations? The giant tree in the front window?”
His sneering reply: “Actually the Christians co-opted the Yule log from the Druids. I’d appreciate if you all left now.”
(Of course, later we realized we should have launched into “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” as we walked away.)
Eva, that is a great story! Hope you enjoyed your hot chocolate.
I couldn’t be further the opposite - I’ve asked people have they heard of the Anti-Christ? When they say yeah, I say, “yeah, well…I’m the Anti-Christmas-Lights Type”. I just jump up and down in a blind, all-consuming rage over it (well, after, say, Jan. 5, anyway) (or before Dec. 1)
This is the only thing I’m a little fascist about.
Hey anyone, please feel free to pick out a car for me. Be creative.
(um, as long as it’s kinda roadworthy)
Bolded part would make a not-bad thread.
Atheist and card-carrying curmudgeon checking in here.
The Christmas season can be enjoyable, if you let it. It’s bright lights, pretty colors, and cheerful music in the dead of winter. It’s re-living childhood memories. It’s good food, good drink, and an excuse to get together with good friends. And truth be told, I like giving and receiving presents.
I’d pick December 10th as the earliest permissible start date. Do people really want to spend 10% of their lives on one holiday?
What’s the alternative?
A 25’ by 11’ 3-D diorama of Guernica should work just fine.