I wish I hadn’t read that, it makes me mad.
But leave NASCAR out of it, for crying out loud! 
I see you live in Detroit. If you watch animal planet you’ll see the show “Animal Cops”…or something like it, set in Detroit. They follow around the animal welfare officers (or whatever they’re called) to various houses to check on abuse cases. You see some pretty horrific stuff.
They always show the owners being led away in handcuffs and let you know what their sentence is at the end, and they’ll show the animal in it’s new home (if it finds one).
—Sounds of Mission Impossible theme begins—
Hop that fence, spirit dog away, place in new home. Hopefully he won’t bark.
I plan on descending silently from the trees.
What a beautifully crafted rant, I give it a 9.9… the .1 is left off due to the absence of any goat felching.
I would advise stealing the dog and leaving a little note on thier doorstep:
To the asshole whom this may concern,
Due to your negligence in caring for [dog], said [dog] has been removed from your custody. Whilst a cattle-prod to the genitals would have been the desired punishment, freeing [dog] has been chosen due to your lack of genitalia. Even though you asshat, pro-lobatomy, rectal wart licking monkey asses deserve to be sent to an island composed of nothing but giraffes and pubic lice... maybe just removing your head out from the depths of your anus could improve your ever decreasing IQ, and give a little taste of human compassion. Because when you deer-fucking ass-for-brains finally end up in that special place in hell reserved for intolerable ballsweat smelling fecal matter such as yourself... You are gonna wish the little demon shoving the pitchfork up your ass has a little compassion for your hemmoroids.
love,
-us normal folk
p.s. Stop fucking breeding.
(yea i’m a bit bored…)
makes a note to never, ever make macabresoul mad
Great rant Blanx. If you need an animal kidnapping buddy I could be up for it. 
Little Plastic Ninja, I want to make Macabresoul furious just to see what he/she will write next. Good one there MS.
dmm- I could always use a lookout with a blowgun as I stealthily descend from above and snatch the doggie…
Why steal the dog? Tell the neighbors that you will buy the dog for $10 bucks. Then, start a letter campaign. Send bogus letters from a bogus agency saying that since the dog has not been vaccinated against Diastic Feral Cole Robbies they are liable for a fine of $486 (half the cost of the vaccination) and possible community service. Mention also that Diastic Feral Cole Robbies can be, in some cases, transmitted to humans. Make up some symptoms that match things that seem to be wrong with them. Perhaps include a flyer which has a NASCAR star explaining that a mere $500 is worth it to any family who wants a happy pet and a Diastic Feral Cole Robbies-free baby.
Escalate the letters until they’ll be glad for you to take the dogs off their hands and AFRAID to get another pet.
Blanx, about them just getting another dog if and when this one disappears - some rescue groups have now begun calling all the local shelters and advising them not to adopt to such-and-such family who live at such-and-such adress for such-and-such reason. And some are even going to the point of calling all the ads in the “free pet” section and asking them not to adopt to those people. Of course, that takes a lot of time, and I have never heard if any of these groups are eventually sued for slander…and of course most people who are giving away pets don’t give any more of a rat’s ass than the neighbor or they would have had the pet altered to start with. But it’s a thought, if you have the time and inclination.
I did call the local shelter and asked to have them put on a no-pets list. I don’t think they’d have any cause of action for slander.
and j.c.- I like the way you think!
Blanx, I am there! let me start driving now. I have a friend whom I can stay with in Detroit when I get there so you won’t even have to put me up. What are you 8 - 12 hours from DC?
12, last time I did the drive…