You're a cunt for making my mother's life miserable

The BBQ Pit
1

I don’t post in the Pit very often, because it’s not often that I get passionately angry at something in life. I’ve vented petty criticisms against car design, North Face jackets, corporate radio, Bush, the war on drugs, etc - but it’s uncommon for me to be vehemently pissed at something, particularly at another person. In life, I generally wind up playing the mediator role between other people. I try to see both sides of an issue. I try to be calm and reasonable.

But right now I’m pissed off. Extremely fucking pissed off at a mentally-disturbed, neurotic, severely fucked-up cunt who lives next door to my mother and is currently making her life a living hell and trying to have her dog killed.

Let me give some background. My mom is 48, and lives with her partner, 3 dogs, and 2 cats, in a house in a suburban development. I grew up in that house, and lived there with my parents until I was 18. Then my parents split up, my mom came out as a lesbian, and my dad moved out and got his own place. My mom kept living in that house (eventually her current partner moved in,) and wanted to move out of the neighborhood very much since it was awkward and uncomfortable living in the same neighborhood after such a radical family transformation. But my younger sister loved her room in that house, and this was sufficient enough reason for them to keep it.

My mom loves animals. She used to have 5 dogs, but gave 2 of them to a friend recently, and now only has 3. My family has had dogs my whole life, and I’ve grown up knowing and loving various dogs practically as members of the family. Kinship with dogs is something I’ve been raised with. Since my parents split up, my mom has been through some rough times and had to deal with a lot of heartache from a lot of people. During these times, her dogs are her emotional support. She is extremely dependent on them. In particular, Cole, a black lab/pitbull mix. This is her oldest dog, and he has been in our family for about 7 years, even back when my parents were still together. Cole is like her best friend. Hell, he was like MY best friend back when I lived there. He’s the best dog I’ve ever known - loyal, intelligent, friendly, not at all aggressive.

So a few months ago, Cole dug a hole under the fence around the yard, and walked into the cunt-next-door’s front yard. This woman is an extremely neurotic, bitchy, arrogant woman. Everything about her personality is viscerally unlikeable. She has a paralyzing fear of dogs. When she saw Cole, she freaked out, ran inside the house, and called my mom, telling her she never wanted to see that dog out there again. Apparently he wasn’t barking, he didn’t bite, he didn’t even bare his teeth - he was just out there, and that was enough to freak her out.

So a month later, he gets out again, goes NEAR the woman’s lawn again (apparently he wasn’t even on her lawn, he was just standing right at the border of it, looking at her) and this time she calls Animal Control. This woman is a lawyer, by the way, and apparently she pushed the Animal Control people into issuing an official restriction prohibiting the dog from getting out of the fenced area. My mom was also required to build an even higher fence around the yard, costing her hundreds of dollars.

Well, two days ago Cole got out yet again - again, he didn’t attack anyone, didn’t bark at anyone, didn’t show signs of aggression towards anyone - and this cunt SAW HIM out the window and called Animal Control again. This time, they fined my mom 100 dollars, and notified her that there will be an official hearing to determine whether the dog is vicious or not. (I don’t know how they could possibly prove this - they have NO evidence. He’s never attacked anyone.) Meanwhile, my grandmother (my mother’s mother) is dying of Alzheimer’s disease, appears to be at death’s door, and my mom went to Florida to see her. When she gets back, she has to go to a court hearing, and be faced with the possibility of her dog being put down. When I saw my mom the other day, she was in tears, a total wreck. All because this stupid cunt next door is freaking out over a goddamn dog that never threatened her, never attacked her, never did jack shit besides just stand there.

I’m utterly baffled as to how someone could be this much of an evil cunt. According to my mom, who has had many dealings with this woman in the past, she is completely mentally unstable, a neurotic wreck, and suffers from an eating disorder (she lost about 50 pounds a few years ago, all at once - she looked absolutely freakish.) I really hope she gets help, because from the frantic, ranting phone conversations that my mother described to me, she sounds like she is completely off her rocker. I KNOW that if this dog is taken from my mom, she is going to be completely destroyed - utterly crushed, unconsolable for weeks - she loves that dog as much as I have ever seen someone love an animal. And it’s all going to be the fault of a totally cold-hearted, soulless bitch. So go to hell, you could-hearted, soulless bitch. I honestly hope you die. The world would be better off without you.

2

Except for her paralyzing fear of dogs and exercising her perfectly legal right to contact animal control when your dog is unconfined, just what has she done that makes her evil?

Sure, she has issues. But so does your mother. How come you can’t keep this dog confined?

(Note that I once had a dog-escapee myself. Her first detention cost me $15. The next one $35. The next one $75. And every time she went to jail she got kennel cough so I had to spend additional bucks at the vet. I blamed the dog, spent yet more money to improve my fence, etc., because the fine went up every time and eventually the animal control people would have euthanized the dog–but at no point did I suggest my dog was someone else’s problem.)

3

She’s evil because she’s trying to get the dog declared vicious, even though he never attacked her, barked at her, threatened her, or anything.

4

Yeah I agree, I think your painting an unflattering picture of this woman as some kind of demon when she probably isn’t. She has every legal and ethical right to do what she has done. Your mom needs to keep the dog in her yard or the house.

5

I’m just pissed off at the emotional stress she’s causing my mother, who already has to deal with her own mother dying. You’re right, she should be keeping the dog confined better, but trying to get him declared as a vicious animal with no proof? What’s the point of that? There’s no reason for her to do that. She hasn’t been attacked by him. Either she’s being vindictive, or she’s allowing her own personal neuroses to get way out of control. She has a right to call Animal Control, but I don’t see why she needs to push for him to be declared vicious. And according to my mom, who personally knows the Animal Control officer who spoke to the neighbor, she was indeed actively trying to get him declared vicious. I fail to see how that is necessary.

6

All the same, having the dog declared “vicious” equates with a human death sentence, doesn’t it? Basically it’s akin to putting a peeping Tom to death, would be one way to put it. It’s way over the top, in other words.

7

It’s necessary because your mom didn’t take the action seriously the first two times. . .or seriously enough to stop it. The first time may be deemed an accident. The third time constitutes a problem.

If your mom is unable or unwilling to stop the behavior of her dog, then other steps are required to have others do it for her.

While I am sorry for what your mom is going through, that’s not her neighbor’s fault. And her neighbor has every right to protect herself from this recurring problem.

8

She took it seriously enough to spend 500 dollars on a new fence - which is six feet tall - around the yard. The dog dug a hole underneath it. My mom did everything she could.

It’s the declaring of the dog vicious that causes this disconnect for me. Like I said before - she did have every right to call Animal Control, and if that was all she did, I wouldn’t really have a problem with it. But trying to get the dog put down? That’s not excessive?

9

If you have a paralyzing fear of dogs, and one appears in your yard, that is emotional stress, too.

If the dog has no record of ever having bit anyone, I don’t think you have to worry about having the dog declared vicious. But uncontrollable? Maybe. If he keeps tunneling into the neighbor’s yard–the neighbor who has a paralyzing fear of dogs–then who’s to say her emotional stress is less than your mother’s? I mean, sure, it’s your mom. So you aren’t going to think so.

10

Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m not a huge fan of arguing, so I’ll concede that most of the posters here are essentially right. I still think trying to have the dog put down is way over the top. Hilarity, you’re right, it’s my mom, of course I’m going to take her side. I just needed to write all this to get it off my chest, since it’s been making me really upset.

11

Can a pen with a pavement floor be made, in such a way that the dog will have shade and shelter? This way, if your mother cannot be out with the dog to make sure it doesn’t pull another Houdini, she will know he won’t get loose. It might be worth investigating and proposing as a solution in order to earn a pardon?

12

I told my mom she should just walk the dog when he needs to go out, and keep him inside the house otherwise.

13

Well, not really. There’s electric fences, there’s putting rocks or thorny bushes anywhere where the dog could dig into soft dirt to get under the fence, there’s putting sprays around the perimeter of the yard to let the dog know its boundaries, there’s tying up the dog in the yard to train it. . . and lots of others. Those were just off the top of my head.

Well, as you noted, you feel that your mom did everything she could to restrain the dog and it didn’t work. If that’s true, the only other option is having the dog declared vicious in order for it to be put down.

If your mom did everything she could and the dog will still get out, are you saying that her neighbor should have to live with the dog continually getting out. . .for the rest of the dog’s life? How is that fair?

Since I don’t believe your mom did everything she could, I believe it’s still possible to come to an amicable solution, but you’re not painting the picture that way.

On preview: It sounds like you’ve come up with a viable solution for your mom. I hope that works.

14

Really, I think my mom should get a house in the country with a lot of land like she has always wanted to. The only think holding her back is my sister who wants to stay in that house, but if it was me, I’d try to sell her harder on it.

15

Of course, if your mother did get a house in the country and then let the dog roam free, someone with stock is going to shoot it. So that’s not a winning tactic either.

16

This dog never wanders more than a few houses down from our neighborhood, so it’s unlikely he’d go far enough for that to happen. She’d probably be better off getting property that wasn’t too close to any livestock, though, just to be safe.

Nice username/thread combo.

17

This is won’t be popular, but FUCK THAT.

18

I wonder who among the posters in this thread is a dog owner, and who isn’t?

19

A hearing is probably the best outcome. Then everyone will see that this woman is crazy. The dog hasn’t attacked her in any way. The woman has problems with dogs, but that’s her problem.

20

I have no problem believing this neighbor may be a complete bitch.

Unfortunately, even a complete bitch can be in the right sometimes - especially if she has a real phobia about dogs - that’s not really something she could do anything about, and she may well be genuinely freaked out by the prospect of a dog appearing randomly in her yard.

I hope your mum can find a good containment solution for her escaper - or at the very least, a good new home with some friend she visits regularly. It sounds like a sucky situation all round.

ETA: not a dog owner, FWIW…