I’m not sure anyone here is.
I’m betting the Total Awesomeness Quotient of this whole scenario is pretty low…
What if she’s intelligent, beautiful, kind, loyal, loves sex, etc.?
Yeah, I know, highly unlikely.
All the other questions, comments and suggestions that have gone on since you last replied and that’s what you choose to comment on? :dubious: Is any of this even getting through or are you still convinced the big bad brother is the cause of all your woes?
the OP hasn’t even told us if he already chips in, or not. He may already be doing so. If he’s not, then he should at least be offering regularly, and/or offering to prepare meals, wash dishes, etc..
The “grandpa” cracks are because I find it hilarious that so many posters get so heated about the fact of the kids having sex.
He was more complaining about how the brother treats his family, than about how he makes the OP’s life harder. Reread the first post.
Those qualities are hard to find in a grown-up man or woman, let alone a 17-year old. At best, she’s pretty and likes to fuck - but likely just the last thing.
No. He’s not clueless. He’s taking advantage and he knows it. He’s causing problems and he refuses to see it, he just wants to get his fuck on.
BPC has described four screwy relationships in the short time he’s been on this board. This girl isn’t the love of his life, or even the love of his year. Her family will survive his intrusion into their lives, but they won’t miss him when he’s gone, and it’s certain that they aren’t better off for having him in their lives.
That’s the only sensible comment you’ve made in this thread.
I did internet dating on and off for 5 years before I found my current wife. So yeah, believe me, I know.
You never know, though.
In this particular case, I haven’t heard much advice that isn’t situation specific. I’m not going to get into the car argument as I would imagine that very few students in Munich have cars, but I think that spending every weekend at your girlfriend’s parent’s house is way too much. I can’t imagine that any parent would be happy to have an extra mouth and an extra person around the house every weekend, especially one who is hogging the living room TV playing video games all fucking weekend. Once in a while is fine, but every weekend? Hell no?
Assuming also, that the living space in question isn’t a large American style house with a lot of space, then it makes the intrusion even worse. I’ve had family who I love stay with me in my place which is small. After a while, it gets to be a giant pain since you have far less privacy. If it were a non family member, who just sits on the couch playing video games and not interacting. He’d be out after a day or two and not allowed over night visits.
Part of being a grown up is realizing that people generally don’t have to put up with your shit. If the OP wants to make this work, then he is going to have to figure out something else, because the girlfriend’s mom is going to put her foot down. Brother may be a dumbass, but he has a right to not have an extra person crowding up his living space every weekend.
See, and **BPC **casts a wide net. Out of all females age 14-48 there should be at least a couple in a more compatible situation to his.
I would bet that the sister AND the mother would gladly trade in their brother/son for the OP, if they could. The brother sounds mentally unstable.
It’s not like I’m the OP’s champion or anything, but at least this is a step up from the situation with the underage mentally-disabled girl. Sort of.
Actually, never mind.
You had me fooled.
It would be more accurate to say, “the brother, as described by the freeloader who is fucking his sister, sounds mentally unstable”.
Amiright?
No, you’re NOT right. the OP sounds, so far as I can honestly tell, truly distressed at how the brother treats his family.
You sound like someone who is intentionally looking at the OP in the worst possible light, for your own reasons.
UR. But probably they all have a screw or two loose.
If he was truly distressed, the subject of the thread would be “What can I do to help my girlfriend and her family?”
And the responses would have been the same.
Even if the brother is trying to get the OP to change his behavior, he’s doing more harm than good.
If the brother had any perspective or life experience, he’d realize that this relationship is most likely to be very fleeting, and simply wait it out. My guess is that the mother recognizes the likely-short nature of the relationship, and isn’t gong to bother getting too worked up about something so short-lived.
The same could be said of the OP. This relationship isn’t going to last, so why add stress to the family? BPC will walk away soon. Girlfriend, brother, and mom will be dealing with the aftermath.
It’s none of the OP’s business what the brother might or might not be doing with his life, because it’s not his family and it’s not his house. No matter how awful this brother might be, he’s still in the right, because it’s his house, and until something happens to change that situation, it’s a trump card.
The brother is crazy as shit anyway. HE’S the one that needs some interests outside the home. The OP is at least interacting with the world. The brother is just a fat, unstable, beta male who will probably never get laid, or live outside his mother’s home.