Fuck You, Girlfriend's Brother

The BBQ Pit
1

I guess it’s not enough that you essentially ruin Christmas by:
A) Screaming obscenities at your mother several days beforehand and running away from home
B) Pushing my girlfriend to the brink on christmas eve and saying some very regrettable things
and C) Generally being a total cunt.

It’s not enough that you’ve dropped back twice in high school, that you used to be in my class and now won’t graduate until I’m halfway through college.
It’s not enough that you’re a drunken asshole, who generally wakes up between noon and 4:00 PM, hung over.

I was willing to overlook all of this, because you’re a nice enough, if really fucking stupid, person. But now you’re getting on my case? To my girlfriend? Not even to my face, but to your sister, who already is too self-doubting in regards to this.

Yeah, I wanted to leave on Christmas day, after your mother ran crying to her room (literally) because of the shit you pulled. It’s not because I’m a video game addict and there was a ban on Xbox during the days around Christmas. I can live without internet and video games. It’s because your mother had a fucking nervous breakdown and I figured it would be for the best if she didn’t have another teenager to deal with. And how the fuck do you know what me and my girlfriend do behind closed doors in her room after we get shooed out of the living room? I’ll give you a hint: it’s not just fucking fucking.

And I’m sorry that we spend a lot of time playing video games while we’re at your mother’s house. Here’s the thing: you live in bum-fuck nowhere. There ain’t exactly too much else to do. What do you do all day, Mr. Drives Up The Electric Bill?

Words cannot express my contempt for this bag of shit. And the worst part is, because most of the time when I see my girlfriend is at his house, and he doesn’t know I saw these messages he sent to my girlfriend (and she doesn’t want him to know I saw them either), I can’t confront him about this. I have to play all friendly with this gigantic fat fucking asshole. And it wouldn’t bug me even half as much if I didn’t know that what he was saying got to my girlfriend in a very real way. She’s the shy, doubting type, and while I’m somewhat to blame for not being the most engaging partner in the universe, I sure as hell don’t need him sabotaging me because he, the one fucking person I know who is fatter and lazier than me*, thinks that I’m too lazy and disengaged for his sister.

ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
*Excluding maybe his closest friend, who is just as outwardly vile, albeit not quite as much of a backstabbing prick and more of an outward jerk.

2

Is this the underage retarded girl or someone else?

3

Man, I never got to have my boyfriend in my room with the door closed when I was a teenager! Neither did my daughters.

4

Oh just go fuck yourself. My girlfriend is looking over my shoulder at this, and now she’s pissed at me too. Nice going, fuckwit. She wasn’t retarded, and she was totally legal, and I haven’t spoken to her in quite a long time.

5

While impossible to know the race of a poster simply from their post, I’m wagering this story is brought to you by the White Trash Drama Network.

6

Well, let’s see: As a parent, I see a mother with two high-school children, one of whom drinks heavily and abuses her (verbally if not otherwise) while his sister is regularly behind a closed bedroom door with her boyfriend. (Playing Parcheesi, I’m sure.)

I can’t begin to list the ways I’m not surprised at the dynamics of the situation.

7

I’m in College, on my own, and doing fine. This dude’s mother is a highly accomplished divorcee with a long-standing career, and his sister is a musical ace who is legitimately smart. We sure are all white, but it’s not a case of collective white trash; it’s one stupid fucking bad egg.

Oh, she knows what’s going on and is okay with that. And up until now, every indication has been that she doesn’t completely approve of me, but thinks I’m pretty much okay. But that’s not all we do. Just because we have sex doesn’t mean we don’t do anything else. Oh, the whole situation has some issues. But it’s pretty much all his fault. I’ve done a fairly comprehensive job of making sure that I’m not a problem here, and while it’s always possible I’m doing something wrong, I’m not seeing it. I’m just pissed that that cuntwick has the gall to butt in on our relationship because I’m apparently not good enough. Fuck that.

8

it’s my opinion that every single person on this planet deserves a good solid punch in the face (either physical or figurative) at least once in our lives. Sounds like her brother never got his punch in the face.

9

And I wish I could give it to him. Unfortunately, getting my girlfriend to my house is far harder than getting me to her house, so I’m kinda stuck with the sitch now.

10

Aww thats cute, you blart out your private life on message boards together. Just like watching a movie together, except we get to hear about it.

Anyway, my advice is the same as for most of these pissy threads. Grow some balls and go tell the fatass all this instead of moaning about it online. Are you scared of him or something?

11

Or is it the daughter of the woman who was old enough to be you mother?

Have you considered applying for a spot on the Springer show?

12

Man, I hate to butt into these threads given my previous posting history, but I gotta know…

…why, exactly, does mom disapprove of you, why is girlfriend on the fence about you, and what, exactly, is brother using as the basis for his talking trash?

I gotta know.

13

That does it. I’m getting on the phone right now with DISH and ugrading to the super premium platinum package. Gator huntin, gold digin, and moonshining just aren’t cutting it anymore for me.

14

Can’t be the underage retarded girl thing, because it turns out she wasn’t retarded and was totally legal.

15

Well, for starters, yes, I’m fucking scared of him. He’s a 6’4’', 300-pound gorilla, and while he’s a fat, lazy asshole, he can still lift more than I can. I’d be willing to bet he’s been in more fights than I have as well. But more than that, as I pointed out above, my girlfriend doesn’t want him to know I know what he said to her, and I’m kind of stuck with him for the immediate future, unless I want to reduce the time I spend with my girlfriend to a few days a month.

The mom doesn’t like how much time I spend on my computer/Xbox; she thinks I really ought to get more stimulating hobbies. She also doesn’t like that much of that time is spent in her living room. A fair objection; however, so much of this time is spent when she’s not around, and, as mentioned, this is the middle of bum-fuck nowhere.

The girlfriend isn’t on the fence. She’s just shy, prone to second-guessing herself, and thinks too hard about things like this.

The Brother thinks I think of nothing but video games and sex. Which, given how well he knows me, is fucking depressing coming from him. Really? That’s what he thinks of me?

16

Why wouldn’t those be the only two things you think about? Sounds about right to me.

17

The quoted portion doesn’t make you look particularly good.

18

Do you even lift?

19

So you are saying the one that is yet isn’t is still available? Matchdotcom here I come!

20

Get out of mom’s living room and do something outside. It doesn’t matter if it’s nowhere.

This will not only shut the brother up but the mom as well. And it’ll give the GF less about which to second-guess.

In other words, get a hobby. Trust me, it will help a lot.