Dear Brother,
I do not enjoy watching you make out with your girlfriend. I do not enjoy hearing your stupid little games and endless “debates” about whose cuter then whom, and who loves whom more. You guys aren’t a cute couple. You’re sort of disgusting. It is not a good idea to have your girlfriend in your room, on your bed when our parents are just downstairs. Of course our mom was mad. You don’t get why? Let me explain: You are a horny teenage boy. You have a pretty girlfriend who absolutely adores you. You have your girlfriend in your room, on your bed. You expect our parents to just leave the house and let you guys do whatever? You expect me to just turn the other way while you two snuggle and make-out with the door right open, on the bed that is in the doorway. You cuss at me when I ask you to kindly pry your mouthes apart, I’m only 8 feet away and I’m your sister. I placed those abstinence and safe sex flyers in your room for a reason. I showed you the Craig the Cheerleader sketch where he chants, “Safe sex is in YOUR hands! Sex can wait! Masterbate!” for a reason. Think about it, my thick brother. Also remember I don’t want to be an aunt before I’m 18.
Thanks a bunch.
“Morons it when you call them morons.”
If you substitute Mormons for either or both of those it gets a lot funnier.
How annoyingly self-righteous. I’d cuss at you to, if I were him.
Do they call each other “Schmoopy”?
How is any of this your business?
I agree with Ellis about the flyers. I’ll add that, unless your parents are really stupid, they’re well aware that your brother’s girlfriend hangs out there and, since she continues to do so, they must not be bothered by it so it’s probably not really a bad idea.
As opposed to standing in the doorway of his bedroom, gaping at the two of them and bitching about something that has fuck-all to do with you? Isn’t The Real World on or something? Butt out.
Don’t watch.
Let your brother be happy with his damn relationship. They’re doing boyfriend-and-girlfriend type of cute stuff, shut up.
Sounds like a great setup! Horny male, pretty and receptive female, in bed. Cool.
I’d say, yeah. Either turn away or say “Hey fuckers, close the damn door! Yeesh!”
Stop kissing! I’m eight feet away! I’m your sister!
(I’m not quite sure how that makes any sense, but hey, whatever.)
You felt like being a judgemental preachy bitch?
You were trying to use rhymes in your bitchcraft?
Better give him condoms rather than pontificatory flyers then.
Give him some condoms and wish him luck. Of course he doesn’t sound like he needs it, but you know, you’re not his mother. Leave the parenting to your parents.
I’m no saint when it comes to biting my tongue in the pit, but IIRC flamingbananas is only 14, and so I felt a bit uncomfortable unloading on her the way I would normally had I not recognized the name.
Damn, now I have egg on my face…I assumed she was at least an upperclassman in highschool. Then again, there’s a risk you run that you won’t get a polite response when you post in the pit rather than MPSIMS
I dunno, this sounds like some self-loathing voyeur ranting to me 
Why gawk at the train wreck if you hate it so much, flamingbananas? Really, instead of cockblocking your brother, just shut your door and turn the radio up. Otherwise you are just begging for some sibling payback when you are alone with some guy.
Huh. I think we’ve heard the “Everyone be nice, the OP is young!” argument here in the Pit before. I know I have.
I didn’t change my mind then, either.
Uh, hey guys…it sounds to me like she’s just wanting people in the house to behave the way she was taught to behave. Whether it’s currently okay with her parents or not, it’s obvious she’s grown up thinking this kind of behavior is wrong. She sounds pretty mature and reasonable to me. Sure, putting the flyers in his room may seem a bit over the top, but she’s very young and trying to do what makes sense to her. And, like she said, she doesn’t want to become an aunt at a early age (and she probably doesn’t want to see her brother and his girlfriend saddled with a child they are probably not yet mature enough to raise). So how about cutting her some slack, eh?
I’m not trying to judge anybody or convince anyone not to pile on. I don’t think FinnAgain was particularly harsh. (In fact I could have made the same post myself, as I agree with everything he said.) But if it turns into a multi-page trainwreck where I had been brutal toward the OP, and later found out I had been attacking someone so young, I’d be kinda bummed.
I agree that youth is no defense and shouldn’t be sheltered. Probably I shouldn’t have said anything to begin with, but I just couldn’t help myself. It’s a sickness, dammit!
I don’t like to quote when I’m replying to the last post in a thread, but damn if that’s not the second time in this thread I’ve failled to quote and had another poster sneak in ahead of mine. All quotes, all the time from now on.
Well, given the age of the OP, I can understand a little better. (The pamphlets are over the top, though.) I don’t blame her for not wanting to be an auntie quite yet. It’ll cause great turmoil in that household, to say the least.
With that said, I guess the best thing she can do is try to stay out of his way. Let the parents do what they can to assure that the household will not be thrown into turmoil. Other than that, there’s nothing much for her to do.
Kudos to flamingbananas for having a sense of decency. Some of the other posters here could certainly use a bit of that.
How is it decent to preach at one’s brother that instead of having safe sex, he should masturbate?
The decent thing she should do, if she’s really worried about her brother having sex, is make sure that he’s as educated and prepared as possible. Ideally the girlfriend would be on the pill and he’d be using condoms.
Problem solved, decent, responsible sexual behavior, while she shows compassion for her brother’s wellbeing with no damn preaching.
When I was growing up we were taught to respect each other’s privacy.
She sounds to me like she wants us to think she is mature. And how or why is it “grown up” to think that making out is wrong?
Hardly. For one, that would be nothing more than ‘damn preaching’ of a ‘sex is A-OK, who cares that you are a minor and are probably incapable of dealing with the potential consequences of your actions’ message.
Not that I have a problem with teaching safe sex, but getting the hormonal little creatures to take it easy is even better. Contrary to oft-repeated pleas, nobody has died from not having sex.
You leave the door wide open when holding court on the porcelain throne? At the very least, her brother could have closed the door.
My thoughts exactly. It doesn’t sound as if her privacy was being respected at all.
I’ve got teenage boys and I’d expect them to keep private things private. I wouldn’t have sex with Mr zoogirl in fornt of either of my sons. Why would it be okay for them to have sex with their girlfriends in front of each other?
Anyway, FlamingBananas has made it clear to her brother that that kind of behaviour makes her uncomfortable. If he and his girlfriend persist in doing it in front of her, then that’s just selfish and rude.
Close the door or go to her place.