Not sure what to make of this...

OK, I guess I can see where my parents are coming from. And the fact that I completely went against what they told me was wrong, and I accept responsiblity for what I did. I know that they told me that we werent allowed to be in the house alone but it was completey innocent. I know how it looked, but they have to give me a little more credibility. But, honestly, if they dont believe that I wasnt doing anything with her in the first place, then they really didnt trust me at all to begin with. This is the first time I ever, ever go against their word and I dont see how 17 yrs of being a (relatively) good son can be cancelled out because my girlfriend wanted to come in for ten minutes. What bad luck I have I guess. Just as she’s about to leave they come in and automatically assume the worst. Maybe I’ll understand when I’m a parent. I dont know what to say except that I’m sorry and that I understand that my actions call for certain consequences. I dont know why I’ve decided to pit my parents, but I just needed to get that out. Thanks SDMB.

What’s your punishment?

If that’s all you have to work with, you’d be lucky to make a dollhouse. Keep in mind it would still be a lot of work. And then you’d need a doll to keep in it. Then you’d need to say you made it for your sister so that you don’t look gay.

As of right now, I’m not sure. My parents said that everything was different now “a new game, and that I’d learn the new rules as I go along”. I cant understand how everything that I’ve ever done for them has been cancelled out by one indiscrepency. I know what I did was wrong, I didnt argue the fact that I thought the rule was stupid, and I didnt get mad or try to tear apart my parents when they said that they lost all trust. I did wrong, I knew it, and I accept what comes with that decision. Again, I dont know why I even posted, but it feels good to let it out I guess. Going back to the punishment, I’m afraid to ask. I was supposed to go out of town with my girlfriend for spring break, but I’m sure that I’m going to have to cancel those plans. My parents are really confusing though. They just left me here at my house by myself to go out for the night. I’m not going to do anything of course, but I dont know what to make of this seeing as how just last night they said that all trust was lost. Oh well…

I’m sorry. Maybe I’m just very stupid, but I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. Would an explanation be out of the question?

Far be it for me to judge other parents, but your folks sure do sound like they are majorly overreacting to all of this.

Let me see if I have things straight…you were caught with your 17 year old girlfriend alone in the house, right? Is that it? You weren’t sprung cavorting naked around the limp and lifeless body of the family cat that you just sacrificed? You weren’t discovered as you tied your girlfriends hands and legs to the bedposts while she cried loudly for you to ravish her? You didn’t open the door to your parents wearing only a hard-on?

I must admit, I fail to see what their problem is.

Maybe they just need some time to calm down?

We parents aren’t perfect either. Most of us are just winging it, ya know. :wink:

My kids aren’t allowed to have buddies in when I’m not home either. I’m sure the first time they do, (if they haven’t already) and I catch them, I’ll have to have my little shit-fit and think the world has come to an end.

Then, I’ll think back to when I was a kid and give my head a shake. They’re good kids, and I’ve found that when they push the limits, sometimes it’s a sign that the limits are too restricting. Sometimes it’s me who needs to make an adjustment.

A sincere apology for breaking the rules goes a long way, if you haven’t already. If you usually follow their rules and do okay, maybe they’ll chill somewhat and cut you some slack. They might just be terrified that you’re going to get your girlfriend pregnant and ruin your life. The thought does go through the parental noggin at times.

Here’s hoping thing’s work out okay for you. Good luck.

No, none of that. I agree with you. My girlfriend wanted to come in is all. Just as she was about to leave, my parents walk in and see both of us just as they normally would. I think that the problem is that they’ve told me before that I’m not allowed to have anyone in the house when no one’s around. That’s what this is all about. I know that I disobeyed, but to completely lose trust? Isnt that pushing it? I dont know.

Oh, good. I’m not the only one who was confused by that.

Thanks triss. I did already apologize and I was sincere about it. I just think its ridiculous to say that they’ve lost all trust in me.

Sorry, that should be Triss. Slowly I’m getting the hang of all this.

Well of course you’re right, it IS ridiculous for them to say they’ve lost all trust in you. (Maybe don’t tell them that 'til they’ve calmed down though grin)

Sounds like a parental temper-tantrum is all. Thrown a few myself. Could have sworn I was channelling my mother. Scary shit, lemme tell ya.

They’ll grow out of it. They have to, you aren’t going to be around to take care of them forever, are you? :wink:

Hahahaha, no I guess I wont. But still, I dont know what to think because my parents seemed pretty serious. Again, I take responsibilty for disobeying, but its not like we were having sex or anything. Hell, I was walking her out.

But yeah, I hope that they realize that its not a big deal…

Hell, Flood don’t panic, they’ll probably calm down. Believe it or not, us parents don’t always know what we’re doing all the time. We make shit up as we go along, we fly off the handle and say shit we didn’t mean, we spaz out over nothing, we’re human. A lot of times I still feel like a kid that’s just pretending to be a grown up with a wife and daughter and I have to give the impression that I know what the hell I’m doing even if I don’t. If you have a good realtionship with your folks (and it sounds like you do) They’ll cool off and come up with some kind of punishment and that’ll be the end of it. Don’t take the “destroyed all trust” shit to heart, they don’t mean it, they’re just reacting from emotion. they’re not going to disown you. hell, I can’t count the number of times my old man told that was finally it, pack your shit asshole, and go pick out a nice fucking cardboard box to live in. Twenty minutes later he’d calm down and say he was sorry and he cared about me and he just didn’t want me smoking that shit in the house and it wasn’t good for me anyway. Your parents love you, dude, they’ll come around.

Awwwwww…flood…

Maybe your parents were a little “freaky” when they were your age, so they are probably thinking you’d turn out the same way.

I mean, 17 is young, but you’re not a baby. If you’ve been a good kid, then they should have no reason to not trust you. Why would they impose that rule if you’ve never given them a reason for it?

I don’t know. Maybe I’m out of line for saying that, but I’m not that much older than you are, and I remember doing LOTS of worse things when I was your age… don’t ask.

Your parents will get over it. I think you’ve done the right thing by apologizing. Keep your chin up, ok?

~~Bella~~

Thanks you guys. I know that I’m still a newbie and all, but I love this board for the strong sense of community. You dont know how much you all have helped me in dealing with this. I feel a whole lot better now after posting here. I feel lucky knowing that I have a really good relationship with my parents and a lot better knowing that sometimes they themselves dont know what the hell theyre doing. Undoubtedly, I’ll know what that’s like in the future.

Whoah. I think your parents will come around and realize how lucky they are if this is the worst thing you’ve done by the age of 17. Good luck to you.

Everyone elses parents say the bit about you not doing anything major, like spawning, or dying, or getting thrown in jail. But your parents tend to see the little things.

My bet is, if you were caught nekkid with her, your parents would have freaked out LESS.

Bear me out on this one. My parents went out of town, I took (unwise) advantage of this. My boyfriend-at-the-time came over, we fell asleep in my bed (no sex, I swear) and the babysitter (housesitter, whatever) found us. She went “WHO IS THAT IN YOUR BED?!?!?!” I replied groggily “Noone?” THAT didn’t work very well. I though I was never ever ever going to see this guy again. I called up my parents, apologized, and while things were tense for a while, my head is not out in my front yard on a pike. We’ve regained trust, and I’m not with that guy anymore.

But if I don’t do the dishes RIGHT NOW, I get yelled at, and it turns into a yelling match between us all.

Go figure.
Mainly, don’t worry.

Well, I would think so too, but I think its the opposite. I think that they hold me to higher standards because I’ve been good all this time and so they would never expect this (even though I really didnt do anything). Its like I should know better, which I did. I knew I was doing wrong when I invited her in, and I admitted this to them. I’m just waiting word on my punishment. I’m at home (alone) right now and my parents have been out for the past three hours. Maybe there’s nothing to worry about after all.

Maybe the suspense is the punishment. :smiley:

You probably have a point though, in that they don’t want you sliding down the slippery slope after one small transgression.

I knew I was doing wrong in highschool when I was drinking tequila by the quart and lying about where I was staying so I could be out all weekend undetected. I guess my parents just took the opposite tact and braced themselves for the worst (I still went to college, never got pregnant, arrested, etc).