There is a time and a place for everything, iampunha. I can’t believe you’re being so anal as to mock his caps lock and the many exclamation points. It doesn’t make his post any “funnier”. If you’re going to make fun of the way someone constructs a rant, don’t cry foul when others do, too.
Is there some kind of PROBLEM with that?? HUH??
Bitch.
–tigg, who is doubled over not with laughter, but with cramps
Sweetie? I’m assuming there’s a brain back there somewhere. Might I suggest flipping it on before monkey-slapping your keyboard? Some of us have little sympathy for those who are more willing to curse a nonexistent God than to try to overcome their problems.
You guys are right: that is definitely the high point of the rant, definitely a keeper. On the other hand, since the OP didn’t tell us in which way exactly he is handicapped (I guess if he can ride a bike, fall off it, skin some limbs, we can at least be reassured on that front: he is not a cul-de-jatte*, though he may well have fallen on some more vital part of his anatomy.)
By the way, there are people in this world who suffer from severe handicaps and yet are happy. I hope the OP manages to chill enough so that at least his cat will still like him.
If you are faking the disabled bit, may you be eviscerated with a wooden spoon, the contents stewed slowly with your words, and the resulting mess shoved down your throat.
*cul-de-jatte, French for legless person-- it means the bottom of a jug, not the epitome of PC, but this is the Pit, right?
Hey Li’l Tigger,
I enjoyed hell out of that, even though it was a shade on the futile side (unless you believe in a deity. Then, it was beautifully foul).
Now look, bro, I too am disabled, although ambulatory in a limited sort of way. If this is your disability shouting, you need to re-evaluate your situation. Life is a crapshoot and you’ve got to accept the numbers that come up. I have. But that doesn’t mean you can’t figure out an effective way to load the dice. I have. I still proform a useful function in society. I, with a couple of partners, go into the schools and libraries, and give conservation presentations complete with venomous snakes to display.
So sit back and ask yourself: What do I have that someone else might want? If the answer comes up ‘fuckin’ nothing,’ then get off’n yer ass (figuritivly) and FIND something.
Wishing luck,
f
::gives tigg some Midol, a hot water bottle and a kitten::
Jesus loves me, this I know.
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to him belong.
They are weak, but he is strong.
<This is your part, LittleTigger>
Yes, Jesus loves me! Yes, Jesus loves me! Yes, Jesus loves me! The Bible tells me so!!