I got in to second period this morning carrying a Crunch bar, and sat down next to a girl who had carried in a banana. I proposed a trade, she agreed, we swapped. Then we just sat there, both of us internally shaking our heads and saying “Sucker!”
You next.
LC
My next door cube mate announced she was “Petting her prickly.”
Turns out she was playing with her miniature cactus, but still…not a topic you want to overhear on your way to the printer…
Well, colour me stupid, but I don’t get it.
The word for cholera in the language I’m studying means “vomit and diarrhea”. Just the words for “vomit"and 'diarrhea” stuck together.
And I saw a '74 Dart with a “Keep on truckin!” sticker on the way home.
With a plunger I unclogged a toilet! Saved a large plumber’s fee. 
I showed Mr Magoo how to get to Wal-Mart today.
While cleaning I found this book that my son had when he was about 7 or 8. It’s called My Family and it had all these places where the kid could fill in things about his family.
For hobbies he had:
Daddy: Work
Sister: Watching TV
Me: Reading
Mommy: Eating and Sleeping.
For Best At he had:
Mommy: Jokes and Hugs
Daddy: Watching basketball
Sister: Fighting
Me: Kung Fu
At the end there was a spot for that said: This is my Family. We are:
and he put “the happiest family in the world.”
I showed the book him when he came home from school. He recognized it instantly and said “Oh no! BURN IT!” What a difference 8 or 9 years makes!
I went to the zoo with my daughter today. We got there about 90 minutes before it closed, so it wasn’t very crowded. We walked around a while, got an ice cream cone, then rode the train. Then we went to have pizza for dinner. We talked about a lot of stuff - it was fun just hanging with her. And it was a beautiful, breezy, warm afternoon. Nice Wednesday…
My week ended today at 11 (I went to a war protest so my school day ended early). Tomorrow to Saturday I am representing China in a Model U.N., so today was sweet…
OK, this morning I went to class with a candy bar. A girl who was sitting next to me had a banana. We negotiated a trade, each of us thinking the other had been totally screwed on the deal, and feeling smug for having made such a score.
LC
I didn’t throw up in the grocery store. I thought I was going to but I didn’t.
I have a teacher who says a lot of stupid stuff.
Today, while lecturing about how we should design road shoulders and medians, he referred to the possibility of “unwelcome impacts” for drivers on the road.
Well, I think it’s funny.
Today was blah, but YESTERDAY I started to take my clothes off at the dr. when I wasn’t supposed to take them off at all :eek:
Let’s here it for good communication!
My cat fell down the stairs.
Right from the very top aaaaalll the way to the bottom.
I kept thinking he was going to recover, but nope.
kablump-kablump-kablump-kablump-kablump-kablump-pududpud-kablump-splat.
And then he stood up, shook his head, and viciously attacked a passing tumble-fluff.
Today I saw a car with
*‘retired-no schedule no money’ license tag holder
*a handicapped parking rear view window hanger thingy
*a ‘sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains excite me’ bumper sticker
I thought I saw a certain ubiquitous bumper sticker on the way home that, on closer inspection, said “Goddess Bless America.” Not that I’m a theist, but it was cute. 
Geez! I thought I hated grocery shopping! 
The emergency brakes on the fireplace…broke.
In this play I’m crewing on (Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, if you must know), there’s a fireplace that comes up through the floor on an elevator. When it gets all the way up, the brakes go on. This time, when it haad been lowered a couple inches or so, the brakes went on, leaving a fireplace in the middle of the last few scenes.
Therefore, I got to say “The brakes are broke!”
and good spelling!:smack:
On the BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) train going into San Francisco today there was some teenage kid with an acustic guitar. He was just happily noodling around and singing nonsense lyrics.
I ain’t wearing no underwear today.
Jus’ diggin’, diggin’, diggin’ that breeze.
Groovin’ like individually wrapped Kraft cheese.
When I do wear the underpants they’re unusual.
Were talking leopard print and black rubber here.
But not today, oh no – Au naturale!
Letting freedom ring with the 'ol ding-a-ling.
Every stoic businessman, surly hip-hopper, half-asleep working mum, retiree, goth chic, etc. was near tears with laughter on that train today. I myself went two stops past my destination and backtracked just to sit in on the festivities.