Fun with Scientology

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I got an interesting postcard in the mail today:

How they got my name and my address I’ll never know, but I’m seriously considering going to their little indoctrination session next Saturday.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t buy their line in the least. If I do end up going, it will be because I’ve nothing better to do with my afternoon and want to be an ass in public. :slight_smile:

Seriously, though, there are going to be some impressionable kids there, and (FTR, this is entirely out of character for me) I’d feel pretty bad if they got caught up in such a shady organization.

What do the rest of you think? Should I go there and make a scene? Do any of you know of any anti-Scientology web sites from which I could cull some additional information before the big day? Also, are there any Dopers out there from the Urbana-Champaign, IL area that want to kill a couple hours of their Saturday for a noble cause?

“The true founder of civil society was the first man who fenced in a piece
of land, thought of saying ‘This is mine,’ and came across people simple
enough to believe him.”
–“Discourse on the Origin of Inequality” Jean-Jacques Rousseau

2

Tell them that you went to the doctor and was healed, a miracle of science.

There probably is a whole lot of anit-scientology sites out there, just look a bit, not tough.

I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail.

3

Before you go, get some ammunition at http://www.xenu.net

4

If you plan to go alone, I’d advise against it. Scientology is a pretty vicious cult, and if they have any information at all about you, they might track you down and make your life miserable.

The other day, a small bundle of rolled-up flyers was left on my driveway. As I unrolled one of them, it asked,

“Are you curious about yourself?”

Not really. I should know my capabilities and shortcomings by now. If I need any questions answered, I’ll consult a doctor. Turning the flyer over, though, revealed that it was published by the Church of Scientology. Now I’m curious: what kind of come-on is this cult using? The flyer contains their version of a “FREE personality test”, being offered “obligation-free”, with instructions at the top (italics and caps theirs):

"Answer every question as to how you feel RIGHT NOW. Do not stay too long with any one question, but answer as soon as you understand and then go on to the next question. The accuracy depends upon the truthfulness of your answers. Each question may be answered one of three ways, by marking one of the boxes next to each column:

(+) - means definitely yes or mostly yes.
(m) - means maybe or uncertain. Not a definite yes or no.
(-) - means definitely no or mostly no.

“This is a free public service and there is no obligation. This is done with the idea that people can know and improve themselves.”

Questions include the following:

  1. Do your past failures still worry you?
  2. Have you any particular hate or fear?
  3. Are you normally considered “cold”?
  4. Are there some things about yourself on which you are touchy?
  5. Would it take a definite effort on your part to consider the subject of suicide?
  6. Do children irritate you?

And on and on, 200 questions in all. Most of the questions are subjective, but you can bet that, whatever your answers are, this cult will find something wrong with you that will require relinquishing your personal freedom and most of your worldly possessions to fix. Anyone who spends the time to fill out this questionaire and send it in, along with personal information like address, home phone number and occupation, is begging to be brainwashed.

Free is one of my favorite 4-letter words that begins with an f, but some things aren’t worth having even if you’re paid to take them.

“A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back, he ever wants to see a cross?” – Bill Hicks

5

I think it’s a noble thing to be the present alert gadfly. I’ve read Dianetics, and though it had some worthwhile points on clearing pent up frustation, was really hung up with the theory that problems arise because of maternal rejection in utero. Hubbard’s theories are pretty twisted, and prey upon young people who have unresolved anger, especially.

If you can read the book beforehand, do it. Be prepared for a pretty hardcore psychological grilling apparatus with that organization. I’ve never been through their program, but it strikes me as dangerous because it utilizes techniques that do work to break down people’s psyches. From what I have gathered, it doesn’t replace the problem with anything necessary for the individual to function better outside the organization. That to me is the mark of a useful therapy.

Go, and good luck. Please share your experience here!

6

Zoiks…don’t go make them look stupid in person! Have you read the godawful stories of people who have fallen afoul of the CoS? It ain’t worth it to be public about your disdain.

Personally, I think the CoS is a crock, and I’d love to see it crumble…but I’m not about to get on their shitlist.

7

I’ll toss in with what everybody else seems to be saying here, Pant. Jacking with the Jehovah’s Witnesses who come to your door on Saturday is one thing, the Scientologists are another. They’re organized, mean and hold a grudge. Best bet is to either ignore them (and however they got you on a mailing list) or organize with other stalwart souls before tangling with them.

8

the only thing i know about Scientology is from an article i read in Time magazine about 8 years ago.

i remember the article as a whole was very negative, but one thing sticks out in my mind.
SCIENTOLOGISTS SUE PEOPLE…A LOT

9

I occasionally get approached by an Elronner (read: Scientologist; derives from the name of the cult’s founder, L. Ron Hubbard) in a parking lot or some such, asking, “Do you own a copy of this book?” while brandishing a copy of <i>Dianetics</i>.

My stock reply has become: “Used to. I burned it.”

Heh.

A committee is a lifeform with six or more legs and no brain.

10

When I was 18, a buddy and I where bumming around Boston when we were approached by a good looking girl. She invited us to a “party”, which turned out to be a scientology meeting. I made the mistake of giving them my parents address.

Soon after, I joined the Navy. I received letters from the Scientologists wherever I went. Alaska, Japan, Europe, they always found me. After I got out of the Navy, they tracked me for awhile, but finally gave up.

This was in the 70’s, when it was harder to keep track of people. They were better than bill collectors at finding me.

From my experience, if you go, use false information!

If chickens could pee, they would be wet on the bottom.

11

Pantology,

A friend of mine started a web site I think it’s Scientology Kills

He doesn’t administrate it any more, last time I looked it was pretty crappy, BUT maybe it still has some of the links and stories on it.

If you do go, be very careful…these people are a vicious organization and from what I have heard go to extremes to silence it’s opposers.

12

the link doesn’t work…I can find it on AOL if you really want it, jut email me and tell me you are from SDMB…

13

Here’s what seems to be a pretty elaborate page advising on what to do when protesting CoS: http://thingy.apana.org.au/~fun/scn/demo/howto/

I also agree with the person who mentioned Xenu.net I showed the “Xenu leaflet” (http://www.xenu.net/archive/leaflet/ ) to one of my friends who said he liked the ideas of Scientologists and that was pretty much all it took for him to reconsider his views.

14

You can do what I do. I’ll go up to the testing center, give a false name, and take the test. Then I’ll answer every question as if I were a self-serving, completely guilt-free, self-rightous asshole. After they score the test, you’ll be asked if you’ve gone through a few of their courses before!

15

Yes, that’s always fun. Then when they ask you that, say “No, I just tried to answer all those questions like I was a SS wannabe on crack.” Or something like that.
Something else that’s fun is to go to xenu.net - which is indeed far and away THE VERY BEST anti-$cientology site here on Teegeeack (us “suppressive personalities” call it “Earth”) - and find out all you can about the crap they teach at the various OT levels. Find out the OT level of the instructor and ask them if they actually believe what they were taught when they advanced (ESPECIALLY if they are OT 3 or higher), and whether they thought it was worth ALL that money. Whether they experienced a brief moment of thinking, surely this is a joke.
If you deal with full-time staffers, ask them how much they get paid per week, what was the best meal they ate in the last month, if they are in touch with their families, whether they were afraid of being declared “out-ethics” and having to serve on the Rehabilitation Force. Ask them if they really believe David Miscavige has super powers of the mind. Ask them why LRH had to be so tanked up on dope for his final oh, I don’t know, 15 years or so, if his mind was so Clear. And so on.
Be prepared to be photographed though, and for them to follow you to your car and get your plate #, etc. They will, you know … They are evil.
My advise is to NEVER give your real name address and phone #, and take a cab or a bus.

I’m a loner, Dottie … a rebel.

16

HINT HINT

Earthlink is owned, operated, and run (at the top) by ELRONNERS…

Every member of the Earthlink ISP has been thouroughly “researched”. Also thanks to Tom Cruise and John Travolta, they are getting more $ daily.

Earthlink is a horrible ISP because they DO subscribe to the policies and teachings of LRON and are also under federal investigation, especially now that insiders who are not ELRONNERS have “ratted” them out tot he FEDS, SEC, FCC, and others. :slight_smile:

17

I thought Earthlink was owned by Sprint; anyone, anyone?