Funniest song titles

I was looking for a Frank Zappa CD when I came across his “Zappa in New York”. While Zappa has many funny song titles, this one almost made me piss my pants:

“I Promise Not to Come in Your Mouth”

What is the funniest song title you’ve ever seen?

NOFX: Hotdog in a Hallway, See Her Pee, Please Play This Song on the Radio
Kinky Friedman: Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed, They Ain’t Makin’ Jews Like Jesus Anymore, Asshole from El Paso
Stereolab: Outer Bongolia, Lo Boob Oscillator, Les Bons Bons de Raison

Come and Smash Me Said The Boy With The Magic Penis

Sonic Youth

I believe it was Ted Nugent and the Amboy Dukes that did the classic Breast Fed Alligator

Then there was the intentionally humorous Break Like The Wind by Spinal Tap

If I were a terrorist (I’d bomb your graduation) - Something Corporate.

It used to be funny, before September 11th.

Regretting what I said to you when you called me at 11:00 on Friday morning to tell me that 1:00 Friday afternoon you were gonna leave your office, go downstairs, hail a cab, to go out to the airport, to catch a plane, to go skiing in the Alps for two weeks. Not that I wanted to go with you; I wasn’t able to leave town, I’m not a very good skier, I couldn’t expect you to pay my way, but after going out with you for three years, I don’t like surprises (A Musical Apology)

by Christine Lavin

“How Can I Miss You When You Won’t Go Away” by Dan Hicks and his Hot Licks

And one I’ve heard of but have never heard, so it may be apocryphal : “If you won’t go away and leave me alone, I’ll find somebody else who will.”

“Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving on a Pict” by Pink Floyd

Speaking of which:
Many Pieces of Large Fuzzy Mammals Gathered Together at a Rave and grooving on a brick by Man or Astro-Man.

some band had a song called ‘san dimas high school football rules!’ and i dont remember who it was, but 100 points to whoever knows where that came from!!!

Tha Ataris

aaaaaarrgg, that would be The Ataris.

How about “Who’s Sucking on Grampa’s Balls Since Grandma Ain’t Home Tonight?” by the Frogs, whose lyrics consisted of the title and nothing else.

I’ve always felt attachment to Steve Miller Band’s The Last Wombat in Mecca

“Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goal Posts of Life”, I don’t remember who it was by.

I liked Mojo Nixon & Skid Roper’s original, Debbie Gibson is Pregnant With My Two-Headed Love Child. I even bought the single.

This is from Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.

How could you forget Falling in Love?

Not funny until you realize it’s a song about a couple in an airplane crash :D.

It’s even funnier because that song is an instrumental.

Never Argue With A German If You’re Tired or European Song by Jefferson Airplane was kinda funny.

Bobby Bare.

The following list somehow misses Jerry Reed’s “She Got the Gold Mine, I Got the Shaft”:

David Allen Coe has some bootleg classics…

I Hate Every Bone In Your Body Except Mine
I’d LIke to F** the S*** Out Of You"*
I Made Linda Lovelace Gag
I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Almost Like You’re Here (or something along those lines)
Or just about any Frogs song