ummmm… forget that raindrops on roses stuff.
although, it’s strangely appropriate as a euphemism.
agree with all that bughunter says (lucky lady bug), in theory. i’ve somehow never been in a position to ask what EXACTLY was making me feel so good at the time…mainly because they would have had to stop doing it to answer me!
i do know that when the beau of the mo (who has a thing for black underwear) made me keep mine on, it was unexpectedly good…
Oooh… that makes me feel obligated to add that I especially like to start with panties ON. Something about getting lady bug excited before the panties come off makes me quiver with excitement.
Oh, what the hell, probably everyone does this, but here you go anyway:
Wrap one arm around her thigh so that your hand approaches the promised land from above. Use your thumb and index finger to open up milady. This serves several purposes: one, you can get at the tenderest bits more easily. Two, your arm is locked around her leg, so it’s much easier to stay “on target” when her hips start moving uncontrollably. Three, the spot between your thumb and index finger gives you a space to put your nose; your hand will keep her from grinding against your nose and cutting off your air supply, and you don’t have to pause to breathe. And four, you still have one hand free for other purposes.
I thought it would be interesting if i laid on my back and have her sit over, you know, just like in the “movies”. Yet another “porn doesnt mimic life” scenario. When it started to feel good she started to grind. Suddenly all airways were cut off and I had a person sitting on my head. My struggles only seemed to make the situation worse if you know what I mean. Realizing I was about to die I did the only thing I could. I burst out laughing, only in that situation it was really more just a burst of forced air. With the fleshy lock applied, what happened was a gigantic rasberry sound, like when you blow into someones stomach. The sensation sent her about 20 feet accross the room yelling, “what the hell was THAT?!?!” whilst I curled up in a ball and laughing for several minutes.
An acquaintance of mine who happens to have a full set of artificial choppers, claims his GF’s like it when he takes them out first. Would that make him a “Gum-ilinguist”?
But serially, folks, if she is lying on the bed and you are kneeling at the end of it, you can avoid the suffocation syndrome. The angle of your head to your body is a little less radical.
And Handy, that’s gotta be the oldest joke In The Whole Wide World. But lemmee tell you about my 12-inch pianist…
Podkayne, my boyfriend used to be that way too, but I’ve been teaching him. Some tips:
Don’t tell him outright that he is a bad kisser, instead, take control and show him how it’s done. I tend to bite his tongue if he gets a little too explorative with it. He gets the hint real fast. I’ll lay him on the bed and start kissing him, and if he tries to join me I just stop and tell him no, and I don’t let him do anything until I’m finished. He’s gotten much better. I’m so proud. He says I’m a really great kisser, I say I’m still working on him.
BTW, where do you think guys learn this stuff? Do they think we like having a guy mimic a lizard while inside our mouth???
Oh shit do I feel stupid. Podkayne, I finally realized the meaning of your post. God damn I feel like a retard.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DON’T TAKE ANY CONSIDERATION TO THE LAST POST I JUST MADE…
:::runs away blushing and totally embarrassed:::
I’ll offer no advice about that, I’ve had no complaints thus far.
Suffocation? Damn, you gotta be dumb to suffocate during sex.
You gotta be smart about this. Lady bug isn’t exactly… hmm… svelte… so I don’t let her exactly sit on my face.
But if she wants to be top in the 69, it works this way: She straddles my chest and keeps her weight on her knees, leaning back against my face. A stack of pillows under my head keeps my neck from getting tired. Works great… I can concentrate on her clitoris with my tongue and bury my nose in her vagina… Pure heaven. And it lets me come out for air when I need it. Not to mention the fact that lady bug can do whatever she likes to my own – ahem – sensitive area.
The real problem is that in this position, I’m liable to climax just from foreplay. I gotta be careful when we do this.
Is this a problem, or are you TKOed for the session? Don’t buy in to that myth that we are like a single shot blunderbuss. There’s no physical reason why you can’t take a couple minutes to catch your breath hop back in the ring for round two.
