Meditation will clear your mind and purge it of undesired intrusive thoughts. Just repeat after me: ཨོཾ་མ་ཎི་པ་དྨེ་ཧཱུྃ་, or gnome mani padme hum…
Hey, what happened to my Tibetian script? 
It was there last night. Does anybody see Tibetian script, or just a bunch of question marks?
“Know thyself; presume not God to scan.
The proper study of mankind is man.”
– an example of Gnomic poetry
So apparently a talking Garden Gnome would only utter sententious glurge.
It is refreshing to see proper gnomenclature used in discussions of our shorter brethren.
I had understood that gnomes were gnomadic creatures, preferring to gnoam, that is roam, the hills and dales of christendom. But that does not mean that they are an uncultured or unlearned folk. According to scholars, there are several famous gnomes, including Gnome Chomsky, Gnoman Vincent Peale, the one who invented the gnomon, and an artist, Gnoman Rockwell. Most gnomes conform to gnormative behaviors of their kind, but these three were exceptions–abgnormals, known for their agnomie and gnomelessness (well, Gnoman Peale was not, but got lumped in with the others). The world awaits other future leaders from this fascinating group.
I see just a load of gnumbers
What is small, has a pointy hat, and goes “tick-tock, tick-tock”, over and over again?
A metrognome!
- flees before the gnatives get restless *
This thread is enough to drive a man to drink.
I suggest a bottle of Californian white… maybe from the Sognoma Valley.
I much prefer a bottle of Chateau Gneuf Du Pape or a martini,
Shaken, gnot stirred
Every one of you will be the among the first against the wall when the revolution comes.
Gnomish Liberation Front, Agent 42
Before I ask the burning question I have one observation to make.
I can’t for the life of me fathom out why this thread has not been moved from The Pit to MPSIMS but I guess the Mods have gnot been paying attention.
Now the question:
We all know that apart from Garden Gnomes made of plaster there are REAL ones.
There are also Fairies, Elves, Hobgoblins,Trolls,Pixies,Leprechauns and any other number of wee tiny beings.
Exactly what is the difference between these guys?
I could tell you, but then I’d have to send the Gnome Gninjas your way.
Oh gno, gnot the gnome gninjas
ok, now i am afraid, i was playing fallout 3 yesterday and found… a garden Gnome!, i made my character sloooowly back away…
Whassup! Represent!
Rollin’ wid da gnomies fo shizzle 
Because you asked, here is my version of The Wee Folk:
Fairy: ethereal, pretty creatures, may or may not have wings on back. Tend to look like art nouveau posters. Never seen a male fairy, actually.
Elves: also ethereal, but larger, at least in Anglo-Saxon areas, and more statuesque and beautiful than pretty. There is an offshoot-- Nordic elves and they tend to have distressing taste in hosiery, as well as a predilection for loud colors. Such elves are much shorter than the WASP ones, and tend to be more cute than handsome. Nordic elves may be related to gnomes (see below).
Trolls: live under bridges or on messages boards. Like the taste of goat. Usually not pretty, they have coarse features with hairy facial warts predominating.
Hobgoblins: pesky, playful (but with malice aforethought) creatures. Almost never seen during the day. Difficult to obtain a comprehensive picture of–they rely on their stealth and camouflage.
Pixies: distantly related to fairies, but more mischievous and cute. They are also smaller. They like sticks and straws stuffed with flavored sugar.
Leprechauns: indigenous to Ireland. These are more closely related to gnome and dwarves in that they are a race of small menlike creatures who carry walking sticks, seek gold and drink a lot. There are no known female leprchauns.
Dwarves: miners and cave dwellers. Hoarders of jewels and other precious minerals. Imbibe a lot as well, but are also fierce fighters. It is considered impolite to pick one up or offer to toss him unless one has been given permission.
Gnomes: related distantly to dwarves, but also to (speculation) to hobbits and elves (Nordic). Prefer knitted caps, long pipes and boots as clothing. Also seem to have marked preferences to certain lawns or gardens–gnomes will not settle just anywhere. Tend to be found in groups. Can be political and small terrorist cells are not unheard of. Gnomes seem to be the rabble rousers for portions of the Wee Folk–trolls are outright villains, but gnomes can go either way. Not a group to irk in any way.
Hobbits: see Tolkien’s famous works.
Any questions?
That is so sad! 
Well eleanorigby you certainly know your stuff as regards the wee chappies.
Question:
If there are no female Leprechauns how do they breed?
Observations
:
The sticks that they carry are known as Shillelaghs, not walking sticks
There are male fairies as you can see on the Cottingley Fairy website
Trolls are not all villains, see Shrek
They spring from behind the end of the rainbow.
DUH.
Yeah, but I couldn’t spell that now, could I and I was in a hurry. Jeez.
Honey, male fairies are COMMON amongst humans. See boys named Bruce, hairdressers, interior designers, fragile hip men of a certain age etc. They are just not as common in The Wee Folk as female ones. For more information on male fairies or Mairies, please watch “Will & Grace” or frequent any popular night spot.
Shrek is a freak of nature and as such should not be considered exemplary of the race. Trolls are NOT green, nor do they have odd trumpet shaped ears. Trolls do seem to be able to marry attractive looking wealthy female humans, but most authorities attribute that to their charms (which wear off quickly post-nuptials).
I apologize for not including house elves or borrowers in my original list. For house elves, see Rowling’s excellent research. For borrowers, please see Mary Norton’s seminal works.
Just a minute, I thought it was pots of gold at the rainbows end.
Re: male fairies (Maries), I guess I asked for that didn’t I?