remember remember the fifth of gnovember…
Chance is a fine thing, laddie. 
And I don’t look in the least like Buxom Bess: I don’t wear my hair in braids. 
Until I clicked on your link I had gnever even given it a thought as to which bastard was responsible for the intro of gnomes.
Now I have someone else to direct my hate at.
- as an aside, is it possible that this thread is going to end up as the equivalant to the pigeon eggs one?
Y’gnow, gneverending
As long as there is evil in the world, men must fight the good fight. This thread stands as testament to their valiant efforts, and must exist in perpetuity.
The best way to get rid of the Gnomes is to get them a job! Visit;
http://www.outofworklawngnome.com
Well that was just awesome.
Is the “this web site down for maintenance” the joke, or is it really down for temporary maintenance?
It’s back up now and it is heartbreaking. Little homeless Gnomes digging in dumpsters and sleeping on park benches. The shame!
I know I’m resurrecting a zombie thread here, but I thought it would be very important for chowder to see this recently published help guide (and maybe pick up a copy):
How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack: Defend Yourself When the Lawn Warriors Strike (And They Will)
Well, if you ever want to go completely off your rocker, but not actually harm anyone, you know exactly what to do.
Set up on your roof with a high powered rifle, mowing down gnomes. When the Police inevitably come, you instantly surrender.
When they question you, all you do is look wild eyed and keep repeating “Gnomes. Everywhere. Fucking GNOMES, man! Everywhere I look! GNOMES!!!”
Get a pretty nice vacation in a comfly place with plenty of drugs after that.
Well, even if they are out of work, they can find a sympathetic ear and a warm bed in a local brothel.
Everyone knows the ho place likes gnomes.
[soothing voice]Yes, it’s great to relax in a nice comfy place with plenty of drugs, and, of course, Tweak’s coffee; that country fresh flavor, like the morning after a rainstorm…
.
And if you ever need to find one, just follow the scent of a deer. A gnome is where the hart pees.
chowder appears to have left these Boards for pastures greener. Not sure if those pastures are the next life or Giraffe Boards or whatever.
Have launched inquiry here.
Well, I’m sorry he’s not here, for whatever reason (thanks for making Inquiry, though), but I think this is useful knowledge for all of us. 
Resurrecting the Zombie because this made me wish for a crazy gnome lady int he neighborhood: http://www.thegreenhead.com/2009/11/star-wars-garden-jawa.php
Not that she’d have known what it was, but I’d have enjoyed adding it immensely!
I sincerely hope that when I’m old and decrepit it doesn’t start to sound funny to do these things to my own garden.
I know this is an old thread, but… isn’t it sort of mandatory to steal one and take pictures of it in wacky places?
Damn it! The first time a thread I remember is zombified, and it’s not even random schmucks who drive-by-post? Damn it!
Naah…it’s easier to Photoshop it in.
I grew up in a town in which one family had put up a border of bowling balls around the yard. Yes, it looked odd, but it was reasonably tidy. One of his neighbors hated them, and…well, read this cite.
http://www.weirdnj.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=114&Itemid=28