Okay, I’ve given up any sense of decorum on this board, so I’ll blurt it out…
During the countless hours of often intellectual and non-intellectual discussions with my good friend, I asked
“If your daughter is a younger version of your wife, whom you were physically attracted to, wouldn’t it make sense to be attracted to your daughter?”
His single comment ended that part of the conversation:
“People don’t talk about it.” :smack:
After years of seeking out the ideal woman, both real and fantasy, I came to the realization that my cousin embodied all the traits I was searching for. And apparently I’m not the only one. When my non-blood related “cousin” (but blood related to my real cousin) introduced his fiance to my family, my Mom commented "He’s marrying her because she looks like (my/his cousin).
On a someone related note. Parents if you want to discourage a relationship, say what my Mom did (gosh, I miss your wisdom) when she met a woman I was pursuing.
"Oh, she’s pretty. She looks like your auntie (my Uncle’s ex-wife).
I still pursued her for years, but that was always in the back of my mind!
It should be noted that many cultures don’t really consider marrying a cousin “incest” like Americans do.
Men aren’t normally attracted to their daughters because they* are* their daughters, and humans instinctively tend avoid sexual relations that close. People that closely related even smell wrong.
That said, if some young (wo)man looked like a younger version of your wife/husband, it wouldn’t be at all surprising if they were attracted. And people probably would avoid talking about it since jealousy isn’t very rational.
A conversation that starts with “she looks just like a younger, prettier version of you” is unlikely to go anywhere good.
If you come into reunion with a child you surrendered for adoption, many years later, if you’ve gone through a social service agency this topic will be addrsssed. Usually in the literature you’re provided.
Because it can be a ‘thing’, in reuinion situations. Opposite sex parent/children can feel a deep and profound connection that CAN manifest as sexual attraction.
So there IS a circumstance where it is spoken about FYI.
I don’t recall having said :eek:actually that, but I have said “You look like your mother/grandmother and you’ll grow old nicely.”
I fell head over heels for a friend whom I knew for a while when I saw a picture of her grandmother at 60 that looked exactly like my friend how was then in her early 20’s.
And I always have this fear that I’ll find out that the sister/mother/cousin of the woman I fall in love is a more attractive version of her! :eek: Any wonder why I’m single?
Well, in genetics, “Variety is the spice of life.” The more genetic variety you have, the smaller the chance that recessive genes will match up to produce genetic disorders like hemophilia. So, there is a very good scientific reason over and above any moral considerations for people not to breed within their own family structures.
A normal person isn’t going to think of their own child that way if they raised them. I’ve heard of cases of attraction between separated children and parents, and, while that’s probably a “thing”, it’s disgusting nonetheless.
There have been studies that showwomen tend to be attracted to men that resembled their brothers. I think there is a case to be made that people tend to be attracted to the familiar. My wife is totally different looking than me, so it didn’t turn out that way for me.
I really don’t see the big deal with cousins. That’s an Americanism.
My girlfriend alarmed me when she told me that I was a carbon copy of her brother. At first I thought that was an insult or I was being brother-zoned but she didn’t mean it that way. He is the only person she fully trusts and some of that transferred over to me inadvertently.
There is some type of mechanism that shuts off physical attraction for those most closely related to you. As the father of two daughters, I would never consider such a thing. The thought just never comes up. I have heard that brother-sister incest play is more common than most people realize but father-daughter and mother-son is extremely rare except among deviants.
I think the mechanism is cemented by actually raising the child. Seeing the child grow up. Given the number of cases of accidental (and sometimes deliberate) sexual relationships between parents and children separated at birth, I don’t think the “mind block” is based strictly off what they look like. You can recognize your child is attractive, but anything sexual will get “noped” even before the thought starts.
I recently saw a guy who was one of the most drop-dead gorgeous guys I’ve ever seen. At first I thought it was my uncle, except that my uncle is much older than this guy. It wasn’t until a few minutes later that it occurred to me that it was his son, my first cousin who I hadn’t seen in a long time. It’s nice to know that on some level, we share some DNA.
I had a good friend in high school, and when I went off to college I became friends with another woman who reminded me a lot of my HS friend in so many ways. I asked Linda if she knew my HS friend, like maybe they were cousins or something, and she said she didn’t.
40 years later, when reconnecting via Facebook, I noticed my HS friend now had the same last name as my college friend, so I asked if Linda was maybe a distant relative. And it turned out that Linda was my HS friend’s husband’s sister. So Linda knows her now! (I wonder if she even remembered me asking.)
Obviously the guy married someone a lot like his sister. At least, as I see it.
If you’re referring to Oedipus, he married his mother, not his daughter. Not quite the same thing.
If you’re referring to Aegisthus, while he did have sex with his daughter, it was rape and he was operating under the instructions of the Oracle at Delphi. Again not quite the same thing.
I presume you are referring to Lot and his daughters? As I recall, that one was instigated by the daughters. I guess they wanted a guy just like dear old dad. (The same dad who had recently offered them up for a gang bang by all the townsfolk.) What a messed up family!
Many women (especially with no or emotionally detached father) are attracted to men who remind them of him (in the idealistic sense of what a father should be). Same with men who seek women who remind them of their mother.
Young girls often say their going to marry their favorite uncle (blood related or not) when they grow up and people think it’s “So cute, her first crush”. Oddly you rarely hear about young boys wanting to marry their aunt.
