No, but I often goose my wife if I find myself behind her on the stairs going up.
Have you ever been sued?
No, but I just signed up for a class action suit. My parents own some hotels so they’re being sued constantly.
Have you ever sued anyone?
Technically, no. But I do have a court date next month because a former tenant didn’t pay rent. I want my money, dammit! (*and I found out he was spending the rent money gambling, so it’s not like he didn’t have it.)
Do you like scary movies?
Definitely
Have you ever been on a TV quiz show?
No. I was questioned on a “man on the street” interview once.
Is your hair “styled”?
Nope. Wash it every morning and brush it for about ten seconds, then I’m good to go. Never even owned a hair dryer.
Have you ever testified in court?
yes, several times, 2 assaults, 1 bankruptcy, 3 character witness.
have you ever been bitten hard enough to bleed?
My old cat was kind of an asshole, so yeah.
Ever been the host of a major family gathering (e.g., Thanksgiving dinner)?
No.
Have you ever “celebrated” Thanksgiving by yourself?
Yep… freshman year of college I locked myself in my room with a pile of junk food and a Nintendo 64.
ETA: Forgot to ask a question.
Have you ever been hospitalized for more than a week?
I did in-patient rehab for my alcoholism/addiction, in a setting that was within a hospital – not sure if that counts or not.
Have you ever stayed up all night?
Yes, I pulled at least one all-nighter in college (writing a paper).
Did you ever play intramural sports?
No!
What’s your favorite sport to play/to watch?
MMA to both.
Have you ever won a trophy?
Yes. I was the youngest person ever to win my primary school’s spelling bee. I think I was about 6. I’ve also won a bunch for my fraternity for intramurals and stuff like that but they don’t technically belong to me.
Can you cook?
Yes, very well, thank you.
Have you ever been to a third-world country?
No. Nor am I particularly interested in doing so.
Know anyone who ever rode on the Concorde?
I don’t think so.
Have you ever gone off on a stranger in person? I’m talkin’ “melt-down” here.
No. That’s not how I roll.
Have you ever made a teenager cringe by your inappropriate use of slang?
Other than myself, no. 
Did you ever attend a boarding school?