You need a customer to come in and ask for the biggest wrench they have. When the girl asks why, he says because he has some big nuts.
Did you here about the guy at the sawmill who had the whole left side of his body cut off?
Don’t worry, he’s all right.
Did you hear about the girl who backed into a circular saw?
Disaster (i.e., Dis-assed-her…:smack:…also works for an airplane propeller)
From a guitar woodworking standpoint there is a long line of puns having to do with nuts. A nut is the piece of bone up at the headstock that the strings pass over on their way to the tuning pegs. Getting a nut set up correctly is an art - it must be the right height, may need adjusting after a lot of use, and, if you do a lot of blues/rock-style string-bending, you need to make sure the grooves for the strings have a little graphite in them, so the strings move freely and don’t get stuck, which throws tuning off.
In other words, there is a lot of discussion about getting your nuts filed and lubed.
There has GOT to be a way you can use that…
“Cut that board three time and it’s still too short. Go get me the wood stretcher.”
She was a carpenter’s dream: flat as a board and never been screwed.
A buddy of mine runs the scene shop at a university-he just got one of those.
The Saw Stop is great, unlikely to be used either in her past or current workshops - but I wish they’d had those in various jobs I’ve done.
I remember the ‘disaster joke’ from the 80’s - it was a plane prop then, but that’s a good transfer.
Of course, I’ve only just realised that part of furniture restoration is stripping, how that’s got past us all is beyond me.
I thought that was, “Flat as a board and easy to nail.”
Either way, I willow yew all pie for the jokes.
Thanks very much.