I’ll answer your question if you sleep with me.
Seriously, I’ve always had a problem with women saying “no” when I ask them on a date in the first place, but perhaps because I’m not very sexually aggressive, not with respect to actual sex.
I’ve had sex on the first date exactly once. I initiated (by throwing him onto the bed) and he happily obliged. However, we had a good basis of friendship (about a month of great cameraderie) before we became a couple.
We’re getting married next year.
Last year in health class, we saw a video. A guy was accused of rape (this was fiction, not real) but he says he didn’t rape her because “sometimes girls say no and mean yes.” At the end we were supposed to decide if he was guilty or not. Honest to Og, only two people thought he was, me included. I was disgusted at my classmates. I wanted to shout at them “She said no! He admitted that she said no! That’s all the fucking evidene you need! What is wrong with you people!?” Now, granted, it didn’t seem that he really wanted to hurt her or anything, he was just too horny to care about what she was saying. And I know that this is only tangentially related but…
As for your questions, I’ve never been in the situation, but I imagine that I would keep dating her and I would respect her. Of course, that’s assuming that I would ask. Knowing myself, I’d have to say the only way I see myself getting laid is if she brings it up first.
Well, I’m not promiscuous, so perhaps I’m not the best person to answer.
I’ve twice been in situations where I was told that there wasn’t going to be sex in the immediate future, and I stuck around both times because I really cared about the girls. The first time, we were already fooling around a little, and it ended up progressing faster than she’d planned - she took the initiative and we ended up having sex; the second, we stayed absolutely tame for a long time, and we didn’t end up doing anything beyond making out and literal sleeping together before she broke up with me.
Either way, I really only consider having sex with women I care about, so it’s not a problem for me.
I would kinda like it… I have found that the best time for sex (for me anyway) is after about 4-6 weeks… longer than that, the relationship tends to lose momentum, and shorter than that, it has no where to go (there’s no mystery, no excitement, nothing to look forward to). The unfortunate part of the situation is that most of the time, I’ll hop into bed when she is ready – but it’s always worked out best when she waits for a bit.
Granted, this only applies to the situation when you are dating a stranger. If you have been friends for a long time and then start dating, you can have sex sooner, because you already know who the person is and what you are getting into.