It’s not every day you appreciate a drooling pervert. But they do come in handy on occasion.
(Oh, and don’t worry, my story is boring, but it’s long too!)
So, I lost my job a couple of weeks ago. I’m a consultant, so this is routine stuff for me, but the acquisition of a new job has been MUCH more difficult than usual. It’s taken longer, I’ve dealt with more nonsense, I’ve spent 6.5 hours interviewing for a job that pays $20 less per hour than my usual rate. Just a lot of nonsense.
Then I got hit in the face in the gym. So I have a massively un-hideable black eye. This means I’ve been walking around in sun-glasses with my head down trying to explain to everyone “The first rule of Fight Club: don’t talk about Fight Club.”
So, I was in my interview gear (business suit) with my stupid black eye, getting into my truck in a parking lot as a working man was getting out of his.
Him: Do you have room to get in there?
Me: (Looking at the space between vehicles) Am I THAT big?
Him: Actually, you’ve got a fantastic figure.
I mean, he was enthusiastic and genuine sounding too!
So…I don’t have a “fantastic figure.” After getting up close to 300 pounds a couple of years ago, I had a gastric bypass. Now I’m about a size 10. Minimal extra skin type damage left me looking pretty decent and curvy. But I’m certainly not “thin” and I am still always a little uneasy about my size and unsure how I look to other people.
Think of it as walking around in someone else’s body.
And thank goodness, my “interview wardrobe” involves Spanx. Spanx make it so that NOTHING jiggles. The guy had no idea that my thighs were even capable of motion. I love you Spanx.
And I love you Parking Lot Pervert for turning my nerve-wracked, self-doubting, “does my butt look fat in this,” black eye day into more of a “Hey, I must rule” day.
It’s really sad that all it takes is a guy in a parking lot to turn things around, but sometimes, that’s the truth.
