Once upon a workplace luncheon, As I set bemoaning Brunchin’
Shuttlecocks’ lack of site updates, 'tis been at least week or more;
In other windows I did browse Fark’s stories of molested cows
and Poe’s last ‘Exploitation Now’ whose abrupt ending made me sore
“Though the story might be good,” thought I, "that ending made me sore -
“But mayhap there’s still more in store.”
Presently, a notion struck me; “Self,” thought I, “I wonder what the
Denizens of Doper-land are frothing over on the board?”
To SDMB I then hastened; for nothing’s quite so fun as wastin’
Salaried afternoons amused to death at Pit-flames on the board;
“To Cecil’s Kingdom!” cried I, “rodents, take me to the board!”
Quoth the hamsters, “404”.
“Drat,” thought I, “Those Telco bastards’ T1 lines must all be plastered
maybe I’ll just wait a bit, and access soon might be assured;”
Impatiently, I start to wear the letters off my poor F5 key
Hoping that the hamsters’ smoke break soon would be no more
Picturing the hamsters’ furry asses dragging on the floor;
Smirked the hamsters, “Enter? Sure.”
“Victory!” I loudly cried, “now let us see what’s up inside
the twisted little minds of all the Dopers I adore!”
And anon, a thread I loaded, smart reply from me had goaded
A thing of beauty, this reply, “'Twill have them rolling on the floor!”
Hastily I hit submit, expecting Dopers rolling on the floor
Belched the hamsters, “404”.
“You hairy little FUCKS!” I cried, as error message I espied
“‘Twas only three short lines! You choked on THAT? You fuzzy little whores!
You never turn your rodent nose to Fenris’ tomes of Wagnerian prose
But MY curt three-line message leaves you gasping on the floor?”
The “go back” button I then clicked, to try ‘Submit’ some more;
Mocked the hamsters, “404”.
I like to think that Cecil knows the place to which the dead posts go
Where now it may find peace with all the posts that died before
For now that inspiration passed, there’s nothing of my post to last
To be remembered later on, and praised in future Doper lore;
That nameless graveyard where his evil rodents shat my lore;
Funny here…well…nevermore.