Has there ever been a more idiotic..

[iampunha]

Y’all have forgotten:

the pet rock.

the garden claw.

the thing that holds your book so you don’t have to.

the red, white and blue basketball

goatees (gee, I feel like looking like an animal today . . . horse? nah. Pig? nah. Gee, I got it! Goat!)

[Smeghead]

**
I’ve just got a great idea: a boogie bass with chia pet hair, hooked up to the clapper so you can turn it on and off without getting out of bed. The anus of the fish could be enlarged and served as a holder for your set of ginsu knives, and when you pull out a ginsu knife it “dances” like the butt-shaking Santa Claus that we all know and love.

Would this be patent infringement? I think the excellence of my idea and the fact that I brought together previously unrelated elements of kitch would be enough to qualify it as a brand-new idea.
**

Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhh! No! No! Make it stop!

[Altair_8800]

What really gets me about the Boogie Bass is that it comes with a CD featuring the songs the bass sings (“I use batteries not gas, I’m the funky Boogie Bass”). Now what the hell are you supposed to do with that CD? Play it at your next party?