Yup, that’s the first thing I thought of.
The board died just as I was about to post.
I can’t think of any headlines that I DO read every day.
What?
exactly
Ok, I tried to post a funny/odd news story.
The board went down in the middle of my post.
Why do you have to be mean about it?
Mean? For The Dope, this is stuffed Teddy Bear unicorns with swirly cotton candy manes.
(If we were being mean, we’d’ve found out how your dad let you down in grade school and then we’d bribe your mom to tell you it how it was all your fault…“Just like that thread you tried to start!”)
Oh Man! You know my Dad? I’ve never met him, don’t even know his name. Mom took the name with her to her grave after her long battle with brain cancer.
See, that game doesn’t bother me a bit. 
I just wanted people to make fun of the naked girl in the woods, on a “quest.”
This whole thread is utterly confusing.
Started by a spammer and the mods removed those posts leaving ones by real people? That’s how it looks to me.
I’m sorry. Ever since I was exposed to the headline “Screwed to death by birthday camel”, everything else has just looked mundane to me.
NO! NO! NO! I started the thread.
Before I could post this: Naked Woman Missing in the Forest The board went down. For the next few minutes all I got was that annoying little box saying there’s a problem with the server.
When, about 5 minutes later, I was able to get back on, the thread was up, but empty of my initial OP.
Then Simmerdown posted his, rightfully, confused response. Then I posted the missing link and quote.
Sigh.
Then the earth cooled. And along came dinosaurs, but they got too big and fat, so they died and turned into oil…
Come on, admit it. You were the naked woman in the forest, right?
Sadly, no. Ah, to BE 19 again.
The last place I’ld want to be naked is a forest.
Bugs and poison ivy, thorns, more bugs, slimy worms, did I mention bugs? Ewwww.
“Ike Beats Tina to Death”
Given the locale (I grew up around there), I’d be worried about slugs. Ah, the memories I have of stepping on those things while running barefoot across the lawn…
Not much poison ivy around there (I never saw any), but stinging nettles are common. Thorns? Hell yeah. Fresh blackberries everywhere (which I really miss).
You have forests in Kansas?
Luxury. Up here, due north o’Kansas, we have plains. Lots and lots of plains. And a few poplar bluffs.
Blackberries are just blooming, no fruit, just thorns.
The 11:00 PM news said she’s still missing. Maybe Psychobunny’s cat got her.