Help for aging parent/sibling

A friend is dealing with a tough situation (email excerpted below with her permission) and I thought I’d ask if any of you have any info or thoughts on how to proceed with getting help. She herself is limited in what she can do due to her own family situation, as well as being in another part of the country. Any suggestions to how she might best proceed in finding help in this situation would be gratefully received. I know we’ve got some NJ residents, as well as members who’ve dealt with eldercare issues all over the US.

Using my one bump (I’ve been away for a couple days)


All I can suggest is a visiting nurse service to visit them a couple of times not as a solution, but as a consultation: then you can ask the nurse what her suggestions are. The visiting nurses generally know all the local assisted living homes, nursing homes, etc., and which ones are good and bad.

Other than that, call a local hospital for a social worker who can (if you’re lucky!) help you.

My sister and I floundered when our mother had a stroke: you really are on your own in these situations.

Elder Care Online has vast amounts of information. When you click the link, go to the “Neighborhood Network” link, find New Jersey, and click on that. It’ll bring up all the county elder agencies, their phone numbers, etc.

I was referred to the website by our town’s COA after my mom was diagnosed with probable Alzheimer’s. I contacted our county’s elder agency, who, in turn, assigned us a social worker. SW – bless her heart – set me up with a vast amount of information as to what services were available to Mom, how to go about getting them, etc.

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask here or through my addy in my profile. I may not know all the answers, but I’ll direct you as best I can.

Eve, Kiz - thanks. I’ve forwarded a link to this thread on to my friend and she’s very grateful for the info.