Help! I need some crude pick-up lines about boobies and butts!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I’m not some dirty ol’ man who’s going to use them to try to pick up ladies at a bar.

I’m a girl. I’m just…collecting them.

Actually, I want to use boob/butt lines on guys to see how they react to it.

I looked at websites that list thousands of pick-up lines, but I really need lines that are body-part specific. It’s beside the point that most guys don’t have knockers, capital or otherwise.

All I can think of is “capital knockers” and “Yours is a butt that won’t quit.”

How embarrassing that the only butt and boob lines I know are from the Simpsons.
Let me know your best lines! They can be crude, funny or actually flattering. I will use them when I go clubbin’ tonight and then I’ll report back to you all, ok?

2

Well, if you use a crude “nice boobs” pick-up line on a guy you’re either going to get bewilderment or hurt expressions.

Stick with the butt compliments.

3

You’re right…

Somehow it evaded me that remarking upon man-boobs is a little cruel.

I guess the butt ones are safe though, right?

4

Woo! It’s gotta be jelly, 'cause jam don’t shake like that!

5

Pat (do not pinch) his butt. Ask, ‘So been working out?’

‘I love the way your legs make an ass of themselves.’

As if his ‘Collars matches his cuffs’ (This being an inquiry to determine if the hair on his head matches the hair … elsewhere.)

Tell him his ‘headlights are on.’ (‘Is it cold in here, or are you just happy to see me?’)

6

But that one will only work with his nipples. The dangly-thing doesn’t react the same was to cold as it does to being excited.

And how about something along the lines of having him walk away from you so you can watch the butt again?

7

The original is “nice tits wanna fuck?”.

If you’re going to adapt this, might I suggest “nice ass wanna fuck?”.

8

How 'bout some fries to go with that shake?

9

A nice, respectable gentleman* just made a comment to me as he passed me on the street about “junk in the trunk.” :rolleyes:

Let me tell you, it was the highlight of my day.

*Note: this is sarcasm

10

I thought that was

“Does the curtain match the carpet??”

11

From the ladies man, “Was your dad a thief? Because it looks like he stole two fine hams and stuck them in the back of your pants.”