Help me pick out some gifts

In My Humble Opinion
1

Here’s the situation:

Here in the office, we celebrate birthdays. Sometimes it’s just cake, sometimes it’s pizza and cake, sometimes it’s a whole big shebang. And on occasion, it’s nothing at all. Cards are optional. It’s really uneven, and one gets a sense that it’s the popular kids that get all the toys. Turns out I’m not one of the popular kids, but whatever. I really don’t need cake. Last year Heather got two parties, on two consecutive days. Good for her.

In November, I have a birthday, followed by Stephanie, Edwina, and Letti. It’s the biggest birthday month of the year. And nearly cakeless. Since Edwina is always the organizer of these things, she never throws herself a party. She probably feels it would be gauch, and since she’s accumulating some years, she probably doesn’t want to draw attention to her age.

Which is fine. But her logic on this goes “We have too many parties, so we’re stopping the tradition.” This attitude usually corrects itself by the time Letti’s birthday comes around. (She’s no longer here, so that’s moot anyway.) Sometimes someone repays Edwina’s kindness and organizes something for her.

But I never get a party, and neither does Stephanie. On rare occasion, we’ll have a shared party some time after her birthday. The last time (several years ago), it was pretty much “Grab a slice of cake and get out. There’s a meeting in here in five minutes.”

Let the good times roll.

Sucks for me, and I don’t really even care all that much. But it really must suck for Stephanie. She’s at an age where being popular is more important.

So I was thinking of getting her a little something, maybe along with a card that says something like “From one neglected November baby to another.” Or maybe I should organize the party myself.

What would be an appropriate gift? What might say thoughful but not skeevy? How much should I spend?

And should I do something similar for Edwina?

2

I’d be tempted to get something “November-y”, cheap and jokey. A stuffed turkey wearing a pilgrim hat. Or a turkey-shaped candle or something. Maybe a pair of turkey earrings or a turkey pendant or lapel pin.

Don’t like turkeys? Go for a horn of plenty or something. Might be harder to find.

Five to ten dollar range (although you could go higher, I probably wouldn’t, especially if I didn’t really want something similar given back to me).

I think whether you do something similar for Edwina depends partly on exactly what you find, and partly on you. I’d be tempted to give Edwina a birthday-cake ish item or something which emphasizes her role as planner of parties rather than neglected November baby, but that’s just me.

3

Good suggestions, but I have a problem with seasonal gifts. If I receive a Christmas necktie on Christmas day, I think “Great. Something I can use eleven months from now.”

I don’t want to go too lavish, but I don;t want to cheap out too much either. I have a reputation for giving the best gifts in the office. Everyone always jokes about rigging the Secret Santa so that I pick them. A couple of years ago, I gave Heather a pearl necklace that I made myself. Oh, and an original painting.

I’m thinking maybe I can make something similar for Stephanie. Not pearls, but for about $20 I could make a nice piece of jewelry. I think she’d get a big kick out of it.

4

I understand your objection to seasonal gifts–which is why my nieces get Christmass-y clothes around Thanksgiving. So they can wear it for 6 weeks (give or take slightly).

And if you’ve got a reputation for giving great gifts, why do you need our advice?

5

Maybe one party for all the November birthdays would be a good way to go.
Doesn’t have to be the full-on shebang, but cake and pizza at least.

6

Hey, guess what? If you trace your hand on a piece of construction paper, it looks like a turkey! Who doesn’t like a piece of original art? :smack: That was dumb. I forgot you’re actually an artist.

Anyhoo, if they aren’t dieting they would probably like chocolate. Who doesn’t like chocolate? Jewelry is a little personal unless it’s a silly pin or something.

7

I’m just looking for ideas. I liked your idea of earrings, but I can make something nicer than what I’d find in stores.

8

I second the suggestion for a November birthday party. Being a November baby myself (barely, but still.)

9

There’s probably going to be a combined party anyway, but it seems a little impersonal. I’m trying to make it more personal, but not too much so.

Here’s something else – Steph is pregnant. I could get her something related to that, but that might be too much. And she’s not due until February.

10

If the idea behind a gift for Steph is to make her feel special, give her a gift, not the baby.

There’s nothing wrong with giving her a gift for the baby, of course. But if you want to give her something personal, because of the tendency not to celebrate November birthdays, don’t make it a baby gift.

11

Yeah, I was thinking that.

12

Here’s an idea – a necklace made of citrine. It’s nice, not too expensive, and it’s the November birthstone.

But I need to notice if she even wears jewelry. I think she does, but she’s not today.

13

Is anyone doing a work baby shower for her? Doesn’t have to be big, everyone pitches in $5 for something from the registry and then serve cupcakes during coffee break. But I’d separate the baby gift from her actual birthday.

As for work birthday celebrations, I generally preferred (past tense, I’m in school now) to just get people together and go out to lunch, no gifts expected. That way its not such a popularity contest, and if people can’t/don’t want to come, they’re not missed. If it were my birthday, that is what I would want a coworker to organize for me.

ETA2: I also like the monthly party idea

ETA3: and i think its really nice your thinking of this

14

I wear jewelry. :stuck_out_tongue:

15

She’ll probably get one in January. Another coworker who is due in a few weeks got one last week. And Steph got a wedding shower last year.

16

PM me with your birthdate and mailing address. :slight_smile:

17

okay, then i would skip baby stuff, if its coming later. an expectant-mom-pamper-yourself something might be nice. Not sure what that would be, though, i don’t really pamper myself and i’ve never been pregnant … Starbucks gift card? A calming-music CD?

ETA: well, i guess pregnant women don’t drink a lot of coffee, but you get what I mean.

18

I was at least half-kidding, sweetheart. Nice of you to offer though!
ETA: I agree with the “pamper yourself” stuff. I never pamper myself on my own but if someone buys me something that’s different. I’m hoping someone will buy me a massage gift certificate this Christmas as I will never ever buy one on my own.

19

I was only half promising, darling.

But hey, if I’m making one, it’s not much harder to make two. In fact, I could just make three. That solves the Edwina problem, and gives me something to do with those extra gift boxes that you have to buy in bulk.

In fact, there we go. Problem solved. Go ahead and PM me. I’ll even let you pick the style. That way, I can get a woman’s opinion on what would be good. I kind of like H20-3595GS, H20-3597GS, and H20-3598GS.

20

What about something like silver oak leaf earrings or a pendant? You might be able to find something like that (maybe not actual silver) for not too much, and they could be worn year round, but would also evoke Fall. I know other shops online would have Oak leaf jewelry, probably some pewter out there too. This catalog has some decent things for under ten dollars. (Some of them aren’t so good, but there are neat items there.)