I need help. I have been diagnosed with Bi-Polar type 1 Disorder, and I also did some research and I have rapid cycling of my mood swings, it can happen in 1 day, week, month etc. Both sides are pretty bad I am in my Depressive side right now, my mood cycled last Tuesday. Anyway, along with that I have lower back and feet problems and I dont think I can work anymore, I am 18 (yes I know young still but I have many problems I am facing) I hardly work, less then 10 hours a week now and its even hard for me to do that. I cannot get any help yet because my medicaid runs out when I turn 19 on the 16th of this month and I really cannot do anything until after I try to get it to where i can have it again and see a person for help but right now I cannot do anything. I really want to just quit my job because it gets harder and harder for me to do, I get stressed out easily and get severe stress headaches, when the restaurant gets busy I go into internal panic attack, my short term memory is non-existent, and i lose concentration , my lower back gets to hurting so bad i can hardly move and when I try to sit down for a minute i get yelled at, my mood swings and anxiety are also killing my mental side but my mother cant work and she has to have SS and we need the extra money for bills and food, I cant do this anymore and I need advice, someone please help me…
— thread title edited …Ellen
Are there local social services you can try? If your city has a website, maybe you can look and see what is available. Also, there may be support groups or churches who can help.
Your local library may be able to point you in the right direction.
I’m sorry for your pain, and I hope you find the resources you need.
Thank you for your suggestion, I am hoping I can some way get SSD, It is not only emotional pain I am suffering from but Physical pain as well, in my lower back and feet, But I am open to looking into all suggestions.
Only way to get it is if you tell a doctor about your problems, and get them to believe you. Better to do that now while you have Medicaid, if at all possible.
I am going to try, I really cannot do anything anymore I feel so bad because I feel like I am a waste of space. Physically and Mentally I cannot do anything anymore… 
A community that I found helpful and saw help many other people with a variety of issues was the ADD Forums. This isn’t spam and I’m not affiliated. In fact, I don’t post there anymore, but if you ask some questions at addforums.com they have a section for people with bipolar disorder, as it is often comorbid with ADD/ADHD. People there were often very familiar with the system and various ways to get assistance.
Sorry you’re feeling so down. All I can tell you is that you have lots of life left to live and that means lots of time, and as long as there’s time there’s hope. My mom has bipolar II and I’ve dealt with depression and ADHD and probably other things and if you can gain understanding of what you’re dealing with and take appropriate steps to arm yourself with tools like meds and coping strategies you can really improve your experience of life.
Contact your local mental health association, they may be able to get you the help you need. If you can’t find one, go to a church and ask, they’ll know. And they’re extremely good at getting access for people who really need it, which sounds like you.
Failing that, call a crises line.
Good Luck!
Things might seem terrible right now, but they are going to get better. Asking for help is a very important step. Please don’t be so hard on yourself - you can make it.
Also, if you are in the US, try your County’s web site.
Well put. Keep us posted, OP.
For lower back pain the best thing you can do is stretch the backs of your legs for one minute several times a day. Touch your toes but keep your knees completely locked so it stretches the back of the leg. If you do that one minute in the morning and one minute after work and a few times throughout the day lower back pain will diminish.
You could see if there is a vocational rehab office in your area that would help you get training for a job you could do easier. If you are dependent on Medicaid for medical services and have never had to pay out of pocket you are going to get a chilling surprise once those services end. As a stopgap you should research places that offer cut rate services or sliding scales but if you are in America you are going to suffer a bit once you lose medical insurance. Prescription meds can be bought at overseas pharmacies like alldaychemist.com or many others but getting prescriptions is still expensive.
If you still have medical insurance until the 16 of this month you should be using at a rush pace before it is gone. Call any medical provider, tell them your insurance expires soon and you want to take care of as much medical stuff as you can in a hurry. Get dental work if it is covered, eyeglasses, prescriptions, medications whatever you can, before it expires.
Update now on medicine and in therapy… I have been confirmed as Bi-Polar, but I have ultra-ultra rapid cycling, meaning my mood swings can happen many times in a day, regular bi-polar is at around 2 per year… scary right? Just started some medicine and getting therapy set up. I had to quit there is no way I can work anymore it was driving me to the point of actual madness and now I have to wait a long time before I can be declared disabled by my mental doctor guy (sorry am tired it is about 5 in the morning) because he wont do it until about 6 months in.
Good that you are getting back on track, theo, hopefully you’ll get better.
Crazy Meds is a good resource if you need another.
So that’s it, eh, 18, and you’re done? Ready to throw in the towel and get on the dole already? So what’s wrong with your lower back and feet problems that it’s so bad you can’t deal with employment? What has a doctor said about that? And who hasn’t had lower back pain problems at some time in their life? And you’ve already ruled out other means of employment that could keep you off of your feet and rest your lower back if you actually need that? And what medicine are you on for being bi-polar? It’s often misdiagnosed too, but because you have mood swings and are depressed, and are so stressed out about your restaurant job that it causes you severe headaches, you’ve decided you can’t do this anymore?
You know, maybe at 18, you’re so truly fucked up, you need to stay home, do nothing for the rest of your life and collect whatever freebies you can get coming your way. But I kind of doubt it. You’re young, and got your whole life ahead of you. My first job was at 15 washing dishes and being a busyboy at a restaurant too, btw. Did that for three years. From what little you’ve shared, a lot of this may also be money stress, with you not sure if you’re going to have enough coming in. Hell, that seems kind of normal to get down and be stressed out about that to me. But there are plenty of places that can help out in situations like this too, if it comes down to that and you truly need it. Do you have any other relatives that you could talk to and could help?
can i have your computer?
There is a side I haven’t told everyone because I am afraid to. Sometimes when I get in a mania mood, I get this side of the that gets so very very angry and if someone makes me mad all I can think about at that point is killing them. how I would do it, how I would get away with it etc and it scares me. and this side just gets a thrill from the idea of torturing somebody. I am afraid to tell because I am afraid as to what will happen if i do. 
Theo, have you talked to your mom about all of this? I know you might feel like you can’t dump it on her, she is your mom. Maybe she can help get you help.
Yes, your fear of that is understandable. You want to control the situation and once you tell, some aspects may be out of your hands.
But what about what might happen if you don’t tell anyone? If you don’t let anyone know what’s going on with you, how can anyone help you?
You’re scared because you are afraid that you might lose control and hurt someone. That can’t be undone later when you realize that that was a big mistake. The consequences will be staggering and forever. Your fear is telling you that you need to get help, even though that will be hard and scary. Even though you will be giving up some control in the short term, you will be protecting your future and the people around you, so there isn’t really any decision to make here besides who you should tell.
Start with the doctor who prescribed your medication. They may want to try a different medication for you. They may want you to spend some time in a hospital. If no help is offered or suggested, tell someone else. Keep trying, this is very important.
Yes, that’s what someone in pain and scared needs, a drill sergeant.
I had post partum depression and got to the point that I literally wanted to leave my new born twins outside in their car seats on the side walk and get in my car and drive away forever. I even had a panic attack because I hated myself for thinking that way. I tell you this because I was terrified and my husband was terrified to tell anyone how I was feeling in fear CPS would come and take our babies away. We called my doctor and she had me admitted to a mental institution which I ended up staying at for 5 days. One of the most harrowing and horrible experiences of my life, but the end result was a greater appreciation for what I had, medication that helped a ton, therapy and coping techniques that I use to this day 7 years later when I need to, and an experience I can use to relate to others who are going through similar issues. Life and the problems in it are not permanent and are ever changing, so please do not give up and please get help by being as honest with your doctor as possible so you can get better and not hurt yourself or others. I’ve had depressive episodes several times since then and when I try to deal with it myself it without getting at least talk therapy it is so much worse on myself and my loved ones than when I face my fears and get help.