The bumper sticker on my car is nearing the end of its useful life. In a little more than a year, I’ll have to remove it, and I expect I’ll find an unfaded rectangular patch of bumper that needs covering.
Which means I need a new car. Or a new bumper sticker. As I’m really quite fond of the car, I’ve opted for the latter.
Anyway, the sticker I’ll be replacing is this: “Don’t blame me / I voted for Kerry”.
I must say, I’ve really enjoyed tooling around with that message on the back of my little Mini Cooper. I’ve met some really nice people, gotten more thumbs than middle fingers flashed my way, and in general had a wonderful time being a bumper curmudgeon.
You can see that “Visit Seashell City” ain’t gonna cut it. (Anyway, I’ve been to Seashell City and, nice as it was, it couldn’t help but disappoint. “Man-eating clam”? My eye. That thing couldn’t have swallowed a four-year-old, even if it did have teeth. Which it didn’t, being a clam and all. I’ve never been so disappointed since that episode of *Batman * where the giant clam ate Robin. Even to six-year-old me, it was obvious the damned thing had no way of actually getting Robin into its maw. And then all Batman had to do was to stand up and pry its mouth open. If standing up was all that easy, why didn’t Robin do so in the first place, and spare them all that effort? Talk about cheesy plotting)
But I digress. I’d really appreciate any suggestions for a suitable, universal-in-nature, and if possible non-time-bound replacement for my admittedly passive-aggressive bumber screed. I’m looking for timeless, revelatory truth here, but I’ll satisfy for pithy and clever in a pinch.
One of my favorite bumper stickers is the one that says “Coexist” with Muslim, Christian, and Jewish symbols replacing some of the letters. You can see an example here (about 3/4 of the way down). The site I linked is a family-run sticker/button/t-shirt company. They were a vendor I worked with very closely at my last job, and they’re super-nice people. They’re very left-wing, but you can probably find some fun political bumper stickers on there (I also like “If you can’t change your mind, are you sure you still have one?”)
I drive an old SUV with a very flat back window. It is perfect for stickers of all kinds oval, circle, rectangle, square you name it. Instead of portraying a political or environmental message I have band stickers that are cleverly placed around the spare tire on my car. I took my favorite bands from my itunes and then tried to locate stickers for them on ebay or through google. Some bands have very interesting stickers that someone actually put time into. I really prefer more mysterious stickers than straight up messages. To get free band stickers you might try local independent music stores that also have promotional band posters and stickers that you can take. There is one such store near where I live that I take advantage of, maybe too much.
