I am the hubbie in question. I’m not nutritionally clueless. I am choosing to attack my high’ish cholesterol (220 total) without totally existing on nuts and berries. I have decided to cut out on stupid calories (soda, snacks, breakfast donuts, booze, etc). By doing so I lost 35 pounds a number of years ago and I plan for that to happen again. I hope that my adjustments in diet plus the Lipitor will lower my cholesterol enough without having to resort to more drastic measures.
I have also decided to allow myself one lunch out (alone or with co-workers) per workweek. I work in a cubicle farm and just need to get out of the building once a week. The other 4 days a week I am having nutritious leftovers or Healthy Choice frozen meal. I do not feel I need to do any more than this. If, after I get my blood tested again in early 2015 and there has been no progress, then and only then will I take a look at my diet and see if there is anything else I want to cut out. I would rather cut just enough out of my diet instead of hacking away with a cleaver.
When my wife and I are out to dinner, I am choosing what appeals to me the most off the menu. I’m not going to limit myself to just the veg section, for example.
So I eat a healthy breakfast (wheat toast and fruit until lunch time), I eat, on average, a reasonable lunch. Then, thanks to my lovely wife, we eat a tasty, healthy dinner. I only drink alcohol (2 drinks tops) when I am out. I have already committed to cutting most of the stupid calories out of my diet. Until I am proven that these steps are not enough, I think I’ve done better darn well.
This is exactly it. For IIRC around 30% of people, lowering your dietary cholesterol has a significant effect on their blood cholesterol levels. For others, not so much. Losing weight will work for anyone who is overweight.
The key is not limiting yourself to vegetables, the key is limiting how much you eat almost regardless of what you are eating. American portion sizes are ridiculously huge, so have no qualms about leaving half or more of the food served to you uneaten. Or just order less, appetiser size instead of main course sized serving.
Have pizza, sure, but one slice only. Have a beer or some wine, but one or two only. No fries, no burgers (unless plain meat patty with salad fillings - no cheese, no bacon), no deserts.
And movement is critical. We know now that sitting still for over 2 hours in a row is as bad for your system as smoking. Never sit when you can stand, never stand still when you can walk. Use the stairs, walk up escalators, walk at least part of the way to and from work every day without fail, go for a fast walk for 30 minutes or more every evening without exception. Get standing desks, at home and at work.
Sounds like you’re making some good steps. Have you discussed them in detail with your doctor?
I hear that you are taking steps, and are willing to take more steps if you are proven that these steps are not enough. That sounds perfectly reasonable. The big question, though, is: how will you know?
Goals (they teach us in nursing school) should be measurable and time-limited. That is, “I want to lose weight” isn’t a good goal. “I will lose 10 pounds before my next doctor visit on December 15th” is a great goal. The intent may be the same either way, but only one of those is really able to be evaluated. Even if you don’t meet your goal (and nursing goals always allow for “goal partially met,” as well as “goal met” or “goal not met”) at least you will *know *when you haven’t met it. Then you know whether you need to take more steps.
So, that’s my advice. Set some concrete goals, with the input of your doctor and/or nurse so you know your goals are realistic and will actually be enough to reduce your health risks. Some suggestions, ready for your choosing and tailoring:
“I will walk around the block three times a week each week until Thanksgiving.”
“I will lose ____ pounds in ____ weeks.”
“My total cholesterol will be below ____ at my next scheduled blood draw on ____.”
“My HDL cholesterol will be above ____ at my next scheduled blood draw on ____.”
As for your lovely well meaning yet impotent wife, setting specific goals also shows her that you do *have *goals. You get to set your own goals, because you’re not a child. But knowing that you have them, and that they are measurable and evaluatable, may help her to back off a bit and allow you the room to try what you’re doing, knowing that time will tell if it’s enough, or if more steps are needed.
tenacious j, my dear, I hear you. My husband is stubborn as an ox, a heavy smoker and awful eater despite his COPD and Congestive Heart Failure (oh, and he just got his very own shiny new Diabetes diagnosis, which surprised exactly no one.) He’s also 22 years older than I am, and has already had at least two heart attacks, his first when he was just 40 years old. It terrifies me that it’s very likely I’m going to lose him when I’m still a fairly young widow, and I’m likely to spend 40 years of my life without him. But…I love that stubborn old coot. To make him compliant would be to change who he is, and possibly into someone I wouldn’t like as much. It’s a conundrum. The best results, I’ve found, are gained when I lead by example. When I have a bowl of fruit instead of ice cream, and sit there smacking my lips and moaning about how delicious these g-d strawberries are, it makes the strawberries more appealing. When I suggest we take a romantic walk in the park, it makes walking about love and companionship (and is often a prelude to sex, to be honest), instead of exercise. Manipulative? Yeah, a bit. But it seems to work a lot better than nagging, and I like myself better when I’m enjoying strawberries and walks in the park and sex instead of being a nagging harpy…so it’s manipulation that’s win-win.
Wait, you’re trying to tell us that a woman, your wife in fact, may have mischaracterized your behavior based on an ignorant belief of the typical male stereotype?
I’m sorry, I don’t believe that’s possible. Surely your problems derive from your own ignorance. Surely.
If you have not yet considered this, one good small change that is easy to make is switching from full milk to two percent. It’s pretty harmless but it does help.
I have the same issue, you have my sympathy! I have found the weight loss does really help. Now, if you REALLY want to drive yourself crazy, there’s the whole idea that the cholesterol model of fighting heart disease is utter nonsense. Anyway, good luck with it!
If this is in a context of lunches while at work, could he instead get into the habit of taking a packed lunch with him? Little plastic box with some chicken or tuna, some salad etc? Salad veg mixed into cottage cheese? A bit of a PITA at first, but soon becomes habit. As long as it’s something he likes. No point eating olives and walnuts if you’d prefer coleslaw and vice versa.
Or he can try to avoid the pizza place and - you mention bar food - but surely bar food would usually have some healthy choices available. He could also perhaps take to eating some healthy little snack mid-morning so as not to feel famished at lunchtime. Oatcakes are low GI, so oatcakes spread with something healthy-ish can be good.
That’s what I do- I bring some carrots, cottage cheese,wheat thins, etc. and a book, so if I need to get out of the office I can sit in the car and hide from the co-workers. Harder in winter, but that’s how I get away. I’m trying to get him to do the same but he’s never liked unheated foods, so it’s a challenge. If he gets away from the office it’s to the mcdonald’s or taco bell down the street. Working on this one…
Sigh. Been there. We are now five years post watershed ischemic stroke. NO primary prevention other than being a nonsmoker. Very good secondary, though. Walks with cane, obviously impaired, cannot drive. Still makes my heart go pitapat
It’s hard to say if the stroke would have happened if there had been blood pressure control, cholesterol control, diabetes treated, sleep apnea addressed, and a daily aspirin taken- but his grandmother didn’t have hers until she was 93. 58 was pretty young.
I am the hubbie in question and I’m going out for one lunch a week and one dinner with my wife per week. Granted those meals are not great but 2 bad meals out of 14 isn’t that bad.
I would also be remiss in not addressing the family history that my wife puts so much weight. The only person on both sides of my immediate family with heart issues is my father. He subsisted on sugary foods, and that brought upon his diabetes, which ravaged him. He also smoked, a lot. He had a number of heart “events” from his mid forties until he passed away in his late 70’s.
I believe that the vast majority of his problems were brought upon by himself, outside of genetics. His brother and parents both lived long lives.
I have never smoked and my wife puts together vastly healthier dinners than my mother, the enabler, ever did. So I believe my wife’s concerns about family history are overstated, to say the least. Not saying a healthy lifestyle is not a good pursuit no matter the family history, I just don’t see myself as being in an kind of special risk category.
I see that you subscribe to “high carb low fat” theory of calorie reduction. It simply doesn’t work for everyone, nor is there any evidence its inherently better than other approaches. For the most part it matters that you take weight off, not what you put in your mouth to do it.
Consider a low carb eating plan. Hubby can have all the steak and creamed spinach he wants, but no wheat thins! (ugh – and no carrots either).
However to diggerwam, are you being honest - completely honest – about how often you go out? Your wife seems to think you are eating fast food 3-4 times a week. Is there any reason why she thinks that?
