Holy FUCK it's been a bad week.

The BBQ Pit
1

First, of course the WTC.

Then, two of my best friends at work get laid off.

Now, I’m being transferred from my current much-liked and preferred-career position to a shitty dead-end job.

Yes, I realize it could have been worse. Could have been a LOT worse. I could have been laid off. I could have been killed in the WTC. I could have had a loved one killed in the WTC. But these thoughts don’t help, they only activate my empathy for those worse off and make me more depressed.

So I’m going to rant here.

FUCK YOU, terrorists.

BLOW ME, fucksockets at work who SHOULD have been laid off, instead of my hard-working buddies. And you, you snake son-of-a-whore, you know who you are, you should have been fired YEARS ago, and you survived this layoff. Do you have a photo of the president blowing a goat or something?

And SUCK BY BALLSACK WHILE I SHIT, you cuntwaffles in the head office who cut our budget.

2

… but I just found an M&M, so that’s a plus.

3

And I found out today that my Grandfather in LA had a stroke late last night. Of course my mom can’t get out there to see him because of the backups at all the airports.

Unfortunately, I don’t have any M&Ms.

4

I just want you to know how special this is.

5

What color? Plain, peanut, or (god forbid) crispy?

6

It was a blue crispy. I like crispy.

7

I’ve been thinking about that today. Thinking about people who have other bad shit going on in their lives, and can’t deal with it effectively because of airline problems, or just simply can’t do their usual rant without looking over their shoulder and feeling somewhat guilty because of the tragedy on the news.

I do feel for you–for any of you who have non-terrorist crap messing up in your lives right now. That sucks, and it sucks that it’s happening at a time when neither you nor your usual support network can take it in and deal with it in the way you usually would.

May a few more fortuitous M&Ms come your way.

8

Just to add to the doom and gloom ( like we need it :frowning: ), I just found out a herpetologist of slight acquaintaince ( some of my friends knew him better ), just died in Burma of a Krait bite. Which he received on Tuesday, of all the fucking days. sigh

  • Tamerlane
9

jeez… where did you find the M&M?
cause it could’ve been really old, or up someone’s ass as a practical joke…

just making your day a little brighter!
[sub]i am such a bastard shit! i should send you a whole pack of crispies for being such a bastard…

i really need sleep…

10

One of my buddies who got laid off had REAL interesting day yesterday; turns out some of the terrorists lived across the street from him!

Check this out:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=87420

11

Thanks dude. I will buy two large bags todays, one crispy and one of the new caramel. They will likely be finished by the end of the weekend.

12

I got back from Germany on Sunday.

Monday my phone line went down.

Tuesday, you know. Except my phone was down, and my lover needed someone to get him home after anesthesia (unrelated), and I couldn’t contact him. And since I’m in lower Manhattan, all the pay phones were down, no buses, no subway, no cabs, no way to get to him.

Late Tuesday, the ceiling of my apartment sprung a huge leak. Of course, there’s no way in hell either the phone company or the plumber is coming into lower Manhattan to deal with these problems.

Wednesday - constantly shifting buckets and towels around to contain the leak. Alternated with walking out to the nearest working payphone to call Verizon, plumber, or my panicked parents.

Thursday - wake up with red, pussy infected eye, presumably from all the crap flying around in the air down here. Take out my contacts. More of Wednesady, except I can’t see.

Friday - phones finally come back up. My boss is okay with the fact that I’ve basically been at home all week. The leak keeps stopping and starting, and the plumber refuses to come over unless it is currently running. Grrr.

Yes, I know I’m alive, and this is relatively trivial. But hey, this is my life, and I have to deal with it. And under normal circumstances, I would be getting loads of sympathy, but now I get none. So, “WAAAAHHHHHHHHH”.

Okay, I feel better now.

13

It gets worse and worse.

Tomorrow I have to do a “knowledge transfer” from someone who is getting laid off from the group I was just transferred to.

So on top of being transferring to a job that is NOT the job I want, and they KNOW it’s not the job I want, they laid off a person who wants the job to give it to me.

And the group that I was in, they all got put on a different task, that they DON’T want. This task was taken from a group that got totally laid off.

Yes, I see that I’m in a better position than those who lost their jobs. I’m ranting for them, too, against my fucking company.

I’ve been there over almost 12 years, and it has been a good place to work, until now. Whatever loyalty I have for this place has evaporated in the last week.

When I started there, we were losing a million dollars a day, and we were in a recession. There were no layoffs, but we turned the place around.

Now, we are actually making money, and this shit happens.

LICK MY CRUSTY 'TAINT, YOU CUNTLADELS! BLOW ME WHILE I TAKE A BIG FAT SMELLY SHIT!

14

Hi, I just got here from the planet Dypshyt.

What in HELL is a crispy (or gag…retch…) caramel M&M??? I mean, yeah, I live in the South, but I really kind of thought we were up to date on our chocolate supply.

Are ya’ll just making this up to ensure my week continues as lousy as yours??? Because I can ASSURE YOU IT ALREADY HAS!!! Don’t even get me started about MY goddamn BOSS’S BULLSHIT for the past SEVEN FUCKING DAYS!!!

[sub] Ahem. Sorry. Lost my shit there for a second…[/sub]

Now…what was I saying? Oh yeah. M&M’s.

Didn’t know they were making all those kind nowadays.

[sub]Think I’ll go lie down. Hey kids?? Know where mommy’s pills are???[/sub]

15

There’s a whole bunch of M&Ms here in South Florida.

So far we have:
original
peanut
crispy
peanut butter
caramel

All mighty tasty!

16

I had almond M&M’s last night from the bowling alley vending machine.

I mouthgasmed right there. I had to go home and change my panties they were so damned good.

Just wanted to share that. Sorry everyone’s week is sucking so bad.

Zette

17

Dipshit bosses suck dead yak ass.

I’ve got one too.

I didn’t get transferred or laid off or anything. What I got (I and all my co-workers, I mean) was a bunch of dumbass memos about breaks, phone usage, and productivity. Yukky memos, telling us that we are Bad Rabbits because we take personal phone calls, and some of us divide our fifteen-minute breaks into shorter ones (the smokers, mostly).

My immediate supervisor (who was really icky at first, but then she underwent a marvelous Spiritual Rehabilitation and is now thought of as something very, very close to a Goddess) thinks the memos suck, too. She gives us a lot of latitude, because she knows that a) we don’t really abuse much of anything and b) if she lets us get up from our desk more than twice a day, we’ll come back in much better moods and actually work harder.

Her boss is the one that sent the memos. Now, it’s not the fact that he sent them that pops my cork. It’s when. He sent them on Friday. Last Friday. I saw mine laying there when I came back from the break I took. Why did I take a break just then? Because it was noon. It was noon on Friday–the Day of Remembrance that the President of the United States called for. I (and most of my co-workers) stepped outside to listen to the church bells ring. The memo wasn’t there when I left my desk, at about 11:55. It was there when I got back, at about ten after 12.

Eh, I guess I should cut him some slack. Got to be difficult to read your watch when your head is that damn far up your ass.

18

I went shopping on Saturday and couldn’t find any caramel M&M’s.

sob

19

I had a positively delightful week as well:

First, I find out my parents are getting divoriced. I’m pretty sure it’s 'cause my mother had an affair. Then there was the events that everyone has been talking about. The same day I try to call my father to see if he’s alright and I find out that my pet dog back home died. Few days later I leave Ohio and all my friends to move to Portland. I’m driving cross country with my mom, who on a good day makes me only want to kill her instead of flaying her alive and dipping her in vinegar. So me and my mom are stuck driving driving across the USA together. Throw in the fact that I don’t want her to know I smoke so I haven’t had a cigarette in a few days, and that I haven’t seen nor talked to my girlfriend for a while. Hilarity ensues.

Oh yeah, and caramel M&M’s sound absolutely awful.

20

Where the HELL are you guys getting caramel M&M’s?
That part of this thread is making me hungry.

[minuscule problem]
My cat, Littlebastard, is missing.
I had to let VanDamm in last night, through my window.[/minuscule problem]