I guess I’m the other one. Pattya beach, with 7,000 sailors & Marines; so perhaps the standard steam & cream gals were all taken. I got my poor muscles kneaded and walked on by an old Thai gal who looked like she’d been carved out of an apple and left on a sunny windowsil for a hundred years. Felt great, and guilt-free.
Of course the best workovers were from the Phillipino barbers, who’d chop you across the shoulders with praying-finger fans, then quick grab your chin and snap your neck…which felt great but also scared the shit out of you the first few times.
The key is really whether they cater to women or not. If it’s a place that serves men and women you are less likely to get a happy ending. If it’s more geared toward men, you can pretty much count on it happening.
I once took a class with a young lady who was a licensed massage therapist. She told me she was back in school because, even working at a legitimate massage place, she was tired of seeing guys pull out their dicks.
Anyway I’m curious why this practice is considered so “illegitimate”, and a “legitimate” massage involves touching every part of the body except the genitals. It just doesn’t make any sense to me. It’s pretty strange to consider a handjob prostitution when the therapist is only using his or her hands - I mean, they’re already being paid to put their hands all over your body anyways. A proper massage should include a happy ending - otherwise what’s the point?
Now requesting anything beyond that is a different matter, for health/sanitation reasons if nothing else. But I doubt you are going to catch anything from a handjob, assuming the therapist washes his or her hands before and after.
Spalding Gray had a great anecdote in Swimming to Cambodia about one of the male stars of the “Killing Fields” (It always seemed to me that it was about Sam Waterston). He wanted to remain faithful to his wife so he never got involved with the massage parlors or nightclubs but he pulled a muscle playing tennis at the hotel and requested a masseuse come to his room. She worked the wrong muscle for an hour.
I have a friend who said she was once given one, by a female masseuse, without her asking for it. She said she felt too shocked and embarrassed to protest. She was outside of the U.S. somewhere. It sounds a lot like sexual assault to me, but maybe it was so common for her to do that the masseuse just presumed.
Molly Shannon told a story on Jimmy Kimmel Live about getting a massage and having the same thing happen to her, but she said she liked it. I found it odd that she told something like that on TV and was so casual and cheerful about it. It seemed too good to be a true story.
The interview was on December 9, 2008 in case anyone wants to try to find it.
Puh-leez. You weren’t talking about a situation where somebody just happens to get involuntarily aroused. Rather, you specifically said, “A proper massage **should **include a happy ending - otherwise what’s the point?” (Emphasis added). The logical implication is that if the masseuse does not grab your genitalia and stroke you into submission, then the massage is improper and pointless.
Moreover, mature adults do not seek to gratify themselves every single time they become aroused. Using your logic, if one happens to become aroused while eating at a restaurant, then one should unzip one’s pants and pleasure himself right there and then – otherwise, it wouldn’t be “a completely satisfying experience.”
There was an episode where Samantha was pissed off because a masseur seemed to be giving happy endings (or maybe having intercourse?) to other women at her gym or spa, but not her.
There was also an episode where a guy got a hard on in a restaurant and Samantha’s friend got under the table, pulled out his member and serviced him right there. Satisfying experiences all around!
I get semi-frequent massages, from day spas to the gym to resorts and the local massage school, and I’m 100% sure it’s never happened at those places, though I’m also 100% sure some people have asked for it.
Frankly, over the years I’ve learned what to say to get the massage I want and get the therapist to be satisfied as well. IME, massage therapists always enjoy the fact that I can accurately tell them where I hurt and what caused it, and how much pressure to use. The feedback and the input of information make both parties get exactly what they’re striving for.
As a regular customer of LMT’s (Licensed Massage Therapists) and a traveler to southeast Asia, here’s the situation.
Cheap, gaudy, ads in the freebie papers or the internet, etc., they will provide you with something more than advertised if there is a tip involved.
The words “tantric” and “erotic” tell you that you can expect more than a muscle massage (probably at a price).
LMT’s are almost always on the up and up (no happy ending). If the customer asks for more they will just end the session and walk out. That’s why the accusations against Gore are not very believable. What, he held her down with one hand, wanked with the other and left his spunk while she was incapacitated? Tell me another fairy tale.
There are many legitimate massage places in Asia. Certainly a lot of Asian girls have come to the US and worked in the sex business as masseuses. That doesn’t mean that an Asian massage includes a “happy ending”.
An Asian massage parlor that provides “happy endings” will service males and females. It’s more about money. It doesn’t matter to the masseuse. To them it’s not sexual, its economic. If you want it, go for it, and pay the tip.
If the massage therapist wants to provide a “happy ending” they will give a massage and then pass their hands over the genitals and ask for a tip. The message is pretty clear. You negotiate your price. I’m not going to get into that.
This isn’t rocket surgery. It’s common sense. Have it as you will. Don’t categorize LMT’s as sex workers. They are not. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t massage therapists that aren’t looking for extra tips. However, the ones that are looking for extra money don’t give very good therapeutic massages.
I’m as horny as the next guy, but the idea of a masseuse taking my greasy, lotion soaked John Thomas and stroking it until my spooge comes out, and then having to clean up the mess grosses me out.
I’ll take care of my own business, thank you very much, or better yet, I will let La Primera Senora take care of my needs.