Ah, found it! http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=408156&highlight=precious+tush
Post #12 :rolleyes:
WAG: Stand with one foot on either side of the seat and let 'er rip, I assume. :eek:
Personal to the woman/women (I like to assume it’s just one person who’s doing this such that I discover it about every other week for a couple years or so, but maybe it’s more) who manages to get pee on the base portion behind the seat in my most-conveniently-located workplace bathroom: I hope someone finds you after you did this and makes you wipe it up with your shirt. What, are you hovering over the seat and leaning forward so you blast backwards some in the process? We have ass gaskets right there, always stocked. Be a grown-up about this; slap down an ass gasket if you must, but stop contributing to our already significant seat pee problem! When I do find this, I grab a huge wad of toilet paper and mop it up so that someone doesn’t sit down without looking and accidentally drape their white doctor’s coat/long sweater/whatever in your waste!
(The toilet and the seat are both white, so you can tell it’s definitely pee.)
Exactly. That would mean you’d get some sort of disease from putting your hand or your arm on something, or sitting on a public seat while wearing shorts. Makes no sense.
(I wipe the toilet set with TP and usually that’s it, although sometimes I also use the paper seat cover thing, too. Women sometimes hover and therefore pee on the seats. I’ve done that myself a few times. Pee is supposed to be sterile, though.)
Well, I think it’s stupid to hover, but it’s none of my business what you do in the privacy of the stall. What IS my business is if you left any of your business behind, as it were. That’s what I can’t handle - the hypocrisy of it. “I’m too good to sit in pee, but you’re not!”
ETA - excellent user name to post relationship, BTW.
Judging by some toilet seats I’ve seen, not very well.
Seriously, if you hover clean up after yourself. Be a stealth hoverer, so sneaky no one will ever known you’re too scared to sit down like a grown up.
I’m actually a bit shocked right now that, as much as I’ve always assumed ass-gaskets were what you were supposed to do, only one person out of 70+ voters uses them. I hope those things aren’t expensive…
If I were a girl I’d say anybody who “hovers” needs to have their damn head dunked in said toilet bowl.
Well, the post said she was taught to atand and NOT squat. So, wouln’t the piss or shit just run down her legs?
Hmm. I can pee pretty straight without disruption while standing, but I can see how you couldn’t expect that out of a little girl.
I wonder if it was a squat but while standing on the seat? I can’t figure out why that would be better than hovering, unless the girl was too short to be able to hover over a public toilet seat without fear of touching it.
I’m pretty paranoid about dirty toilet seats. Even hovering is a little too close for my comfort. I like to be a good 12-15 feet away from the toilet. That way I have to sort of projectile shoot my poop into the bowl. What this means at work is that I stand somewhere near my computer, and shoot my poop out my office door, across the hall, through the bathroom door (which I’ve hopefully remembered to prop open) and into the toilet.
I’m getting pretty good at it, too. I’m up to about 11% accuracy.
Goddamn it. I dropped the water bottle I was holding, and spilled on my desk and on my pants. At least they’re dark pants, so I don’t look like I have a bladder control problem. I use an ass gasket unless the seat’s wet, then I wipe it off then use an ass gasket. If there are no ass gaskets, I soil the floor.
Related: on my train home tonight was a rather mentally disturbed young lady who spent 5 minutes mopping the floor of the toilet with tissue paper, in full view of everyone, while explaining to me that she was “OCD about cleanliness” (her grime encrusted tracksuit suggested otherwise).
She then told me I was lovely, grabbed hold of my genitals and tried to kiss me.
I sit on the toilet, unless there’s something visible on it. If what’s on it is either piss or blood, I wipe it and sit. If it’s shit, I go to another stall and sit there after checking, only because I’m not going to wipe down the damn toilet seat well enough to get rid of a solid. I’m not the damn janitor, and I’m not the previous user’s mother.
It’s my ass. I’m not eating with it.
No hoverer will **ever **clean up after herself. Because that would mean they would have to risk coming into contact with the evil, evil toilet seat.
I don’t understand women and pee. My wife, who I love dearly, uses a huge honking wad of toilet paper to daub away her urine that I would feel comfortable using to mop up spilled sulfuric acid.
I agree with the rest of you - you “ladies” who hover and then leave your urine on the seat for the rest of us to enjoy should be ashamed of yourselves. Come on! Where were you raised, in a bus station? GAH!
I can’t believe there are so many of you who wipe down a toilet seat that looks clean. Exactly what are you trying to accomplish? You do realize that the toilet seat is almost certainly one of the cleanest surfaces in there–probably way more sterile than the door handle you’re probably going to have to grab to get out of the bathroom, which I’m sure you won’t wash your hands after touching?
I did something a little bit like this once, on a Greyhound. The bathroom was incredibly filthy, but as I was going to be stuck on the bus for at least another hour, I didn’t really have another option, short of asking the driver to open the front door and get a firm grip on my belt while I lean out. Thank god for several months of peeing in Japanese toilets in college–I was able to lift up the toilet seat, plant one foot on either side of the hole, and squat over it, balancing myself by grabbing the handily placed railings.
First I check it for droplets - I carry baby wipes, so if it looks sprinkled upon, I wipe it down and dry it off with TP, then I just use it as normal.
I wipe it down because the lighting in public toilets often isn’t great, and it’s just as quick to grab a sheet or two of paper and give it one quick circuit as it is to eyeball it for moisture. Sterile or not, I’d rather not get a wet arse (same reason I drop the paper into the bowl first to prevent splashback).
I sit down and pee. If I see something on the seat beforehand, I wipe it off. Sometimes I don’t even do that, which means there have been times when I’ve sat in pee :smack:. When that happens, I just grab more TP and wipe it off, plus the stuff still on the seat.
The only toilets I’ve ever really been cautious with were the ones at Girl Scout camp. But that was mostly because there was the very real possibility of opening the lid and seeing a gigantic spider sitting in the middle of a web stretched across the seat. :eek:
I also don’t understand hovering. These women are trying to keep their tush away from a dirty dirty toilet seat, but it’s hovering that makes the seat dirty in the first place! It’s a vicious cycle that must end.