How do you entertain yourself when stuck in traffic?

I floss my teeth and do crossword puzzles (not at the same time though :)). How about you?

What do you do with the little bits of food and plaque that the floss pulls out?

I complete home renovation projects in my head, step by step. Either that or have sexual fantasies.

I don’t know, but if the OP ever offers to give me a lift somewhere, I’m declining.

I sing along with the CD – but I have to create a harmony line. The trickier, the better, not just singing a third above the melody, but creating a complementary backing vocal.

And think about things I have to do when I get either home or to work. Singing’s more fun.

Increase my rocking out by a factor of 5.

I listen to Old Time Radio and fidget with my balls.

Add up the numbers on license plates.
It is relatively infrequent to get over 50.

I squish other cars with my fingers, squish them, squish them, I squish other cars with my fingers.


I try to create mathematical equations that come out to zero with plate numbers.

Got to get them done before the car gets out of sight, otherwise, it doesn’t count.


Luckily I have no traffic problems here, but my MP3 player keeps me entertained, I have like 14 days of music on there.

Same as when I’m not stuck in traffic.

Read a book.

The fuckwit who ran into me the other day amused himself by picking his nose and smoking. He ducked to light or pick up his cigarette just before the crunch.

I repeatedly unload and reload my gun.

I look around to see who is masturbating or having sex.

Any sightings?

A few weeks ago I finally did it: I knit.

If the traffic is so bad I’m actually stopped still, I read or check my schedule. If I’m still moving a little, I sing with the radio (good mood) or invisibly mark my fellow commuters for fiery death (bad mood).

Fortunately haven’t been in traffic like that in quite some time, but I used to play harmonica (sometimes along with the radio) or read a book. Harmonica was usually better, because I was in traffic that would slowly move in frequent intervals, making reading very annoying. But I could still play harp with one hand and drive at that speed.

Or occasionally I masturbate. Sometimes I’d change it up by having sex with myself.
actually, in the interest of full disclosure, did you know that if you absolutely have to make it somewhere and are falling asleep, jerking off does pretty well at keeping you awake? don’t ask me how I know this. it doesn’t have anything to do with 250 mile trips in the wee hours of the AM. really.

So… you drive a stick shift? Any grinding of gears or slippage of clutch?