How far do you think you could travel naked?

Suppose you set out tonight to travel as far as you could without a stitch of clothing. Using all resources at your disposal, what route would you take and how far do you think you could get?

Pretty far. I’m physically able to refuel the car without exiting the vehicle, so I’d only be limited by my bank account. Barring truckers radioing me to the police, I could get from florida to alaska. Of course I’d have to stick to lonely highways.

I don’t have a car. If I called a taxi, I expect that the driver would zoom off without me pretty quickly if I came out to the street stark naked. My other option would be to walk to the local station and catch a train, or wait at the bus stop for a bus. Either way I suspect I’d attract attention quite soon and have the police on hand within a few minutes.

So - not very far at all.

I would take the most direct route from my shower door to the dresser. That’s as far as I would make it.

I think you forgot about one thing. What about bathroom breaks and disposing of the by-product?


Since I’m here, until my gas tank runs out, I guess.

ETA: You can go to the bathroom somewhere really private - in the woods or whatever.

Depends on the weather. If it’s zero with freezing rain, or -20 with a 50-km/h wind (the kind that’s like knives in exposed flesh after a minute), I might make it to the corner a hundred metres away. If it’s a hot summer day, I could make it to the river until the mosquitoes got me. Perfect spring weather? Quite far, really.

But of course there’s only a 50:50 chance that I’d make it out of my building before I got spotted.

Paint on a suitand keep a distance.

Naked bicycle suit would be even faster.

If I took my chauffeured car to my private plane, I could do it indefinitely.

But we’re going for distance here. Eventually you’d reach a controlled border.

Not if you just flew around over the ocean. And you don’t have to go through customs until you land. What about in-flight refueling and reprovisioning?

Are there airports where you can land, refuel, reprovision, and then take off again without leaving the plane, and without being customs-inspected?

Could I fly around between Canada, the US and Mexico I wonder? (I don’t actually have a private plane with which to verify)

If I jumped in the Prius with a full tank I imagine I could get 400-500 miles, with some strange looks from passing truck drivers. Armed with a debit/credit card, and carefully choosing my gas stops so I can tank up with the car door shielding me from view, I’m pretty sure I could make it across the US. I’d head south first, then across the US while it’s still warmer.

I’d head for big cities and find the local gay community. I bet you I could quickly find someone who’d find it amusing I’m going as far as I can naked, and put me up for the night.

Border crossings are probably out. I could probably make it from the west coast to the east coast. Maybe Key West, but not much further. From Key West, I might be able to find someone willing to entertain my silly adventure and bring me by boat out to the Caribbean or maybe central America. At that point, I’d turn myself in to the authorities and declare myself making a political statement against the current American administration, and probably get thrown in an insane asylum, or quickly make the news and get an all expense paid trip around the world, granting documentary rights to the highest bidder.

You know, this sounds like a plan!

On foot, I’d probably freeze to death in a mile or two.

If I left my boat at the dock and walked, naked, to it in the dark, I could get to Glen Canyon Dam at least. If wearing a pack violates ‘naked’, I could walk to somewhere in the La Sals. By car, naked in the Beehave state? Not very far.

Sorry for the hijack, but how is that possible?:confused:

My mom could pick me up in her huge Dodge van with the dark tinted windows and if she’d drive me to Bakersfield, I could use my sister’s bathroom, then on to LA and my cousin’s house, then San Diego and my aunt’s house…
But I don’t wanna.:frowning:
And somewhere between here and there, she’d make the cell phone call and get me 5150’ed because naked travel is just so not me.

He has an enormous hose…

I read through the thread & didn’t find an answer to my question, which is this: Tomba, why do you ask? What incident, if any, brought this to mind?

Love, Phil

My car’s right outside and I think the tank is pretty full so I could make a few hundred miles. I probably could make it to my brother’s house and maybe convince him to drive me around so he could make fuel stops.

Alternately, not using my personal vehicle, I might be able to make it across town by staying off the main streets and get to the train station. Once there I could buy a ticket on the credit card machine to NYC and arrive naked in Grand Central Station. Once there, I can travel around indefinitely because anything goes in that city.

I could easily get to the car naked and, assuming I had a good explanation, I could probably talk my mother into coming with me to handle gas and food, so the lower 48 would be open to me. The main problem would be that I’m tall and female, which would put my naked torso within easy ogling height of the windows.

Anyone with a vehicle tall enough to see into the car would be well aware of what I was doing. We’d have to stick to back roads and hope the cops never happened to peek in.