I envisage the ** Mach Daddy** - it is basically a mach 3 but it will be blinging its shizzle like it aint no thang and will have solid gold blades encrusted with diamonds and have a faux mink handle with polka dot motif.
Or possibley the Mach 10 - it uses hollow point shells to literally ‘gat’ the hair straight out of the follicles, making sure to get medieaval on the hard to reach parts whilst simultanousley bitch slappin yo face smooth…Aiiiggghhhht?
Just cut to the chase and use a sharpened cheese-grater.
Much more important - what will it cost?
I just now noticed your misspelling of near is not Nair. Drat.
What the hell goes into R&D for a razor that could possibly cost $750 million? That’s more than it costs to design many cars and airplanes. Or even spaceships.
I suppose it goes something like this:
R&D: 1 million
Massive ad campaign: 374.5 million
Shipping out a bazillion free samples: 374.5 million
Hell, I’d do the R&D for $50.
Them: “We’re looking for a 4-bladed razor design. Do you have any suggestions?”
Me: “Yes. Make the head very slightly longer, and insert an extra blade.”
Sound of crisp $50 bill being passed.
In 10 years, Gillette razors will boast an array of blades vast enough to contact the user’s entire beard at once. Each flexible razor head will custom-mold itself to the user’s facial structure. One quick swipe and your whole face is as smooth a baby’s butt. And replacement cartridges will only cost $852 each.
Wassamatta? You’re 1920’s style “Death ray” not working?
Well, my 1920’s style “Punctuation ray” certainly isn’t working.
I was wondering about this myself.
I think the razor of the future will have somewhere between ten and two hundred thousand blades and will not only achieve a perfect shave in the up, down and sideways directions, but also in, out, round, through, and forward and backwards in time as well.
It will, of course, be far too heavy to lift (which is shy the television commercials have started to condition us to the use of razors in a zero-gravity environment), but the Multi-Kilo-Blade razor will be fixed in a stationary position; the user will move his head back and forth across the device.
My money is on no blades. The razor will look the same, but instead of blades, it will have a bacterial strip that eats your facial hair off.
If the replacement cartridges get any more expensive, then to hell with it says I.
Bring on the electrolysis!
Plus tax.
WILLASS not quite mink and diamond encrusted, but available with a gold finish, bling, very bling:dubious:
Ah yes. And in 10 years, the average state sales tax will be about 23 cents on the dollar.
They won’t have any blades. You’ll buy a package of nanomachines, armed with microscopic pairs of scissors, and smear them on your face. When you say “Shave ON!”, they scurry around, cutting each individual hair perfectly level with your skin. After they’re finished, they march down your chest and sleep in your navel.
You’ll never have to replace them, because their scissors are self-sharpening. You’ll never need to recharge them, because they’re powered by your body heat and the kinetic energy of walking around.
But you’ll need to pay a monthly fee to Gillette, and if you don’t, the nanomachines will wake up at midnight and cut off your johnson!
Hey, you’re all a lot more creative than I am!
All I can come up with is “I think the theoretical limit on the number of blades on a razor has been proven to be 2*pi”.
Tried the Mach 3. I’d never had razor burn before; it was interesting. A whole section of my jaw developed enormous, garganuan proto-zits, which seemed to develop heads instantly, at the most embarrassing moment possible. I also bled copiously.
I’ve gone back to my normal method of shaving: dull disposable razors. Much more comfortable.
Remember:
The first blade chops off the hair, and lifts it.
The second blade chops off what’s left of the hair.
The third blade is for skin.
What kind of idiot would spend that amount of money on a razor? What next? Solid platinum toothbrushes? Christian Dior silk toilet paper? The mind truly boggles…
Wilkinson Sword (who do actually make swords) have just released “the worlds first 4-blade razor”