How to 'fancy-up' canned chili

The latest canned chili thread I could find was from 2004 so I thought I’d start a new one.

The story: A co-worker brought in some fantastic chili, made from scratch. I raved, so she gave me the recipe. It has sweet potatoes in it which is nice. But it also requires about 15 spices I don’t currently have, nor would probably use again and it requires 8 hours in crock pot - which I also don’t have. Or have the time and patience for.

I thought I could start with a ‘good’ store-bought canned chili and fancy it up. (Yes, yes, I know I’ll probably step on a few chili-snob toes, but what the heck). :slight_smile:

So, what say you, dopers, what is a good canned chili and how do you spice it up?

I don’t fancy it up. I just mix a can of Hormel chili in with a box of mac and cheese and go on a carb-fest. But this gives me the thought of mixing in a spoonful of my Mexican spice mix.

The meat in canned chili can be a little weird, like overly soft, and it tends to be very saucy. Adding in some cooked ground beef shores up the texture a bit. I also like to add chili oil to kick up the heat, and I like it a little greasy.

Chopped onions and shredded cheddar on top are a must. Jalapeno slices if I have one.

As for brands, I’m a simple man with simple tastes and a low budget, so I’m actually partial to plain old Hormel chili with no beans. Stagg is literally just Hormel with a different label (they’re made by Hormel). Wolf Brand was pretty good the few times I’ve had it, and it is consistently ranked the highest in internet rankings for whatever that’s worth.

I think you’ll get better results for similar effort by getting a pack of ground beef and a packet of chili mix. You just brown the meat, mix in the packet, and spoon over rice.

Either way, you need to add acid. Some lime, or a can of crushed tomatoes. Then more seasonings to bring the flavor profile back up. Chili powder, cumin, maybe a touch of cinnamon if you like that.

Start with Wolf Brand chili. Add onions, red pepper flake, hot sauce and as much cheese as you have.

They’re made by the same company but are different recipes and prepared differently (Stagg is slow-simmered). I use Hormel if I want a very basic chili that I’m going to add to, such as a chili dip with cream cheese; something where chili is just an ingredient alongside other things. If I want actual chili to be the main thing, or I’m eating chili on its own, I’ll get Stagg. I think it tastes better. I also really like the Stagg with chunks of beef as opposed to ground beef.

In my experience, Hormel chili doesn’t have meat but instead has a sort of meat slurry. Some of the other brands are more appetizing. (And actually, the fast food chain Wendy’s used to have pretty good chili though I haven’t tried it in decades.)

Made out of cooked but unsold hamburger patties that are tossed into the freezer until they need to make a batch of chili.

At least it had visible chunks of meat. As I remember, it really was pretty good.

It’s low quality meat mixed with soy flour so it keeps that soft consistency no matter what you do to it. There is a Hormel Angus Chili that’s more or less identical to the chunky Stagg chili described above by @Atamasama that has what at least resembles chunks of real meat.

This is a fact, from Hormel’s own site:

Water, Beef and Pork, Beans, Concentrated Crushed Tomatoes, Contains 2% or less of Modified Cornstarch, Textured Soy Flour, Corn Flour, Salt, Chili Powder (Chili Peppers, Flavoring), Sugar, Flavoring, Green Chiles (Contains Citric Acid), Onions, Spices, Jalapeño Peppers, Vinegar

(Bolding mine, of course.)

I’m not sure how much of that is used as a thickener for the chili and how much is mixed into the beef and pork, though.

From my college days, you “fancy up” chili by adding saltine crackers.

This is also what they do at…

And I’ll say, Wendy’s chili does still seem really good, but you have to eat it fresh. (I think the meat and kidney beans are top notch, to me that’s what makes it delicious.)

Agreed.

Why not try my dentist’s chili? It really is pretty easy to make from scratch, with no weird ingredients (sweet potatoes- WTF?) and only takes a couple of hours on the stove- no 14 hour BS.

Chili - Ted R. Hume III, DDS (tedhumedental.com)

And you can buy the spices pre-measured as well, which saves a lot of time and trouble.

Ted Hume’s Root Canal Chili Mix - 2003 & 2012 Original Terlingua Inter – Mild Bill’s Gunpowder Foods (mildbillsspices.com)

Very little.

And pour over a bag of Fritos. Mmm, mmm.

If you have a Whole Paycheck near you (aka Whole Foods) they have a spice section where you can measure out little amounts of a given spice so you do not have to buy a whole bottle. Still not cheap on a per weight basis but it’s better that way when when you only need a couple tablespoons of some obscure spice.

And, of course, you can do a pot on the stove in lieu of a crock pot (just take care to dial in that low heat setting). I think crock pots are overrated anyway (my brother had one and it cracked his stone counter top because the heating element was at the bottom). Heck, I bet even an oven would work if you got the temp right.

Anything you can do with a crockpot, you can do with a Dutch oven or similar pot over a low flame or in a low oven. Crock pots are maybe nice for the “set it and forget” and don’t worry you’ll burn your house down, I suppose, but I’ve gone almost half a century without a need for a crockpot. (Actually, I did have one in the old house that my father left behind before either throwing it away or giving it to the thrift shops. I did find it was wonderful for rendering tallow when I would barbecue a bunch of brisket and trim the fat.)

This, basically. My husband is very much not a cook, but back when he was in the Navy, his command had a chili cook-off and he wanted to enter so he got some large cans of Hormel and added onions, jarred jalapenos (instead of the red pepper flakes because not being a cook he didn’t own any) and some tabasco. Topped with shredded cheese. It was a hit.