I’m sure I’m not the only one with a loved one with PTSD. My guy has it from his experiences as a first responder at Ground Zero, as I shared over inthis thread. **cynyc **suggested I start this thread, and I think that’s a fantastic idea.
So…loved ones, mental health professionals and people with PTSD…what can we do to help a person with PTSD?
WhyNot, I have it - and all I’ve been able to tell people who are close to me is to back off when I’m feeling overwhelmed - and listen to me if I DO want to talk (which is not often). I was able, a few years ago, to get help with it through some therapy (when I was diagnosed) but now there’s no insurance. So the night terrors continue, the sleepwalking continues, the panic attacks continue…
All I want my close people (very very few) to do is just be supportive (which is totally hard to define - I know). I don’t have anyone to work with on this anymore (no insurance) medical wise so I battle it alone for the most part now. But my husband does the best he can to get me through it day by day - and some days are harder than others. But he knows when to back off and when I need him to not back off. It’s been a learning process to say the least.
And no, I’m not going into what happened that I have it. Let’s just say it’s not something I ever even want to talk about, but something that haunts me and my dreams and has for years. 
Sometimes things suck. And blow. At the same time.
Thanks, Missy2U. And no, I don’t expect you to share, of course. But thank you for your perspective. Sometimes I wonder if “giving space” is perceived as “not caring”. Good to know space is needed sometimes.
I just asked him how he was doing (whatwith the date tomorrow) and he said, “Not so good.” “Is there anything I can do? Is there anything we can do?” “Just what you’re doing…love me.”
Not a problem. <3
THAT’S the part that took my husband so long to realize - he can’t fix it - but he loves me through it.
Just love MrWhyNot through it. 
And thanks - for understanding. And helping!
Most of the veterans I’ve known suffer from some level of post-service stress. It seems to help them to be around others who went through the same thing. This could be through support groups, veterans’ organizations, or just a friend.
Missy2U, My brother is a veteran who has never had insurance through his job. All his medical needs, including psychological, are treated at a veterans hospital at no cost to him. Is this a possibility for you?
I’m not in a great space and I don’t want to hurt your feelings. Your SO is a very lucky person to have anybody care at all. I like you very much. But…
You’ve PM’d me a bunch of times and posted several times which leads me to worry if you’re more of a nervous wreck than anybody during an episode wants to deal with. Maybe you are making your “SO” feel even worse–like “and here I am fucking up everybody around me too.” I don’t know but I think I’d feel that way.
Personally, if somebody stopped tip-toeing around and just flat out asked, “How can I help?” I’d either fall over and drop dead or actually tell them.
It’ll be over in a couple of days.
Put on some music. Do a strip tease. Wave your butt in the air. If I was a guy that would distract me, I think. 
P.S. You’re helping me by getting my mind off of me. See how it works.
I’m glad.
Nah, things are pretty quiet here. I flitter and flutter here and it keeps me from fretting at him in real life. And I type quickly, so our three or four PMs took all of 4 minutes or so out of my day; I post between doing charts for work, which is why it seems like I’m on here constantly. But thanks for your concern.
And I did ask him flat out (see post 3), thanks to your advice earlier. So, again, thanks.
Just love me translates into “a spontaneous blow job wouldn’t hurt.”
(Trench humor.)
HA! You’re probably exactly right. 
Told you I could be handy.
Accept that you can’t fix it, and don’t let that distress you, because that adds to the overhead.
*If *he wants, discuss if there’s anything during a time when he’s not feeling down.
Not a vet - but thanks for the thought. I appreciate it. I’ll deal - I have to.
cynyc take care of yourself. I’m thinkin about you.
bump