I agree that gem-quality diamonds are evil. Sure. Everyone knows that. I think the CEO of DeBeers even makes public appearances wearing a Darth Vader mask and chanting incantations to Satan.
But gold?!? Gold isn’t evil! Why, it’s downright lawful-good! How can you just sit there and malign this wonderful precious metal?![ul][li]It never tarnishes. The only way to get it to react chemically is to mix hyddrochloric and sulfuric acid together at high concentrations. And even then, the reaction will proceed very slowly.[/li][li]It’s incredibly ductile. In theory, one troy ounce can be stretched out into a thread 60 miles long.[/li][li]It’s one of the densest substances known. 19.3 grams per cubic centimeter, the same density as tungesten and only a little below platinum.[/li][li]It’s got that great shiny yellow color to it.[/ul]If someone offered me a pound of any metal, I’d say “make it gold”![/li]
Well, okay, actually I’d say “make it rhodium”, because rhodium is selling for something like $2000 per ounce these days – and then I’d sell the rhodium and buy gold with the proceeds!
Oh I went through the same stuff. My sisters argued about the dresses. One of them stormed away saying she wasn’t coming. Everyone had advice about what we should do instead of asking what we wanted. Brian and I finally made the decision to cut everyone out. We moved our wedding up and made all the plans ourselves. I didn’t bother with invitations or anything. I just told everyone a day and a half before the wedding and said if they wanted to come, we’d be happy to share our moment with them.
Worked out great. Now if only I could get the guy to get off the couch and take out the trash…
I just got married last June, and I know exactly what you mean. We also did the low-key, small informal wedding thing (mostly because we were late-life newlyweds, he was 45 and me 38, 1st time for both of us). Did it all ourselves and talked everything over WAY in advance, which helped. Also since the in-laws were from out of town, we didn’t have the interfering mothers to deal with.
But the smartest thing we did was go to the doctor about a month before and ask for assistance. My doctor gave me a prescription for Alprazolam, a mild trank, and I took one the day of the wedding. My husband got Lorazapam, the GOOD stuff, since he’s on so many other meds for various health problems. In other words, we were drugged to the eyeballs and everything went reasonably smoothly.
Meanwhile, don’t sweat the details, everything will fall into place. Trust the professionals you’ve hired: they know their jobs. Don’t worry about the rest of the people, either they will behave and cooperate or they won’t, and you can’t do anything about that. Finally, expect something to go wrong – it always does, and no one will notice except you. Mostly, HAVE FUN! (A tall order, I know, but you can do it if you try.)
First of all, AkashJ, don’t worry! With all that’s on your plate right now, actual marriage will be a joy and relief. The wedding insanity is the anomoly, honestly!
Sit down in comfort w/ your intended, pop a bottle of wine (if appropriate) and talk it over when you’re relaxed. Decide what’s important to both of you and what isn’t.
This may sound tough, but disregard what’s important to assorted family members. Getting spastic and strung out over flowers, nuts vs. mints, and all the assorted hoopla is futile–and crazy-making. The best, the best pattern you could establish now is agreeing what’s worth worrying over–and standing together on it.
True fact: most people go to weddings prepared to celebrate a joyous time. Any beady-eyed taste cops aren’t worth worrying about anyway. The wedding isn’t the point: the marriage is–and oddly enough the most moving, joyous weddings are the ones where the participants are too happy to care a damn if/when “glitches” occur.
So a baby cries. So the icing on the cake melts a little. Your friends and family are there to witness and celebrate your very happy time. They aren’t “the audience” and they’ll react to your joy rather than a bunch of niggly set decorations.
Sincere best wishes and congratulations to you both!
Veb
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