Inspired by this thread and specifically by MandaJO’s post about how to tell if it’s the forever kind of love…
How else can you tell if it’s the forever kind of love?
For instance, are you willing to accept that the bedroom that you used to keep neat and orderly will now be replaced by a floor that is a minefield of dirty underwear and that one dresser will become the Leaning Tower of Dockers?
Will you still love your SO when they fart under the covers, then pull the covers over your head and hold them there?
Its definatly love when you can learn to love all the little quirks your SO has. If you can deal with the fact that they pick their nose or fart in public, forget to flush the toilet, put their trash everywhere but the trash can, snore loudly, ect…Then I think you got a chance to last. With love comes the ability to accept a person for the way they are without wanting to change them and vise versa. That means accepting everything, their family, friends, bad habits and the like without having those things deminish your feelings for your bf/gf.
Love is knowing 30 years from now they might not have all their hair or hit the middle age spread and you will still think they’re the most attrative person in your eyes. Love is not minding to wipe the boogers hanging out their nose when they’re sick. Love is working together as a team, making sacrifices and compromises for the benifit of the relationship.
But above and beyond everything else communicaton is the most important part of a relationship. If you’re with someone and can’t talk things out then it won’t last.
Not the best definition in the world but I think if you’ve got all that going on then you’ve got a good chance at lasting forever.
My grandfather (married 62 years last week!!) gave me this advice -
You’re truly in love with someone when you know that not only do you want to live your whole life with them, you know that you don’t want to live your whole life without them.
Along those lines, I believe the most common way to find out if it was forever love is to completely FUBAR the relationship, then to spend the rest of your life miserable and hating yourself for losing them.
wolfman, that was one of the most cynical things I’ve ever heard. Not bad. I’m not sure how you meant it to sound, though.
I’m happily married to the first woman I was ever with. We have a beautiful baby girl who is now only just over a week old,a house, car and dog. Two months ago I had major back surgery, and I am currently working my ass off to keep them well and happy while taking care of my job.
I’m pretty miserable right now, and tired of this crap. I want the baby to grow up and get out, I want to go on vacation for a year, I want my wife to get a damn job …
But the other day, I was staning there, petting the dog while she was holding the baby, and our eyes met.
We just lookad at eachother from across the room for a full minute, and it was one of the greatest moments of my life.
That is love.
That’s not to say we were always this way. Years ago, we were regular kids going out and being assholes to each other and finally we broke up after a few years. While we were apart we were assholes to other people adn made all sorts of mistakes …
And we grew up. More than a year later, we kinda fell back together and were in a love stronger and better than before.
It only took us a year to do what you suggested because we were lucky enough to do it at the right time in our lives.
I think I’m done now. No great advice of anything, just my tale for you to consider … for comparison’s sake.
When you take him to your gynocologist checkup and he starts talking big screen TVs with your Doctor. All the while you’re sitting there in your little paper shirt … you crack up about it later over breakfast and know this is a story to be shared.
When you can clean up their vomit and not be thinking the whole time about how gross it is, or smells.
When they have a pimple the size of an invading battleship on their back in that one spot they can’t reach, you squeeze it for them, and don’t get out of the way in time to avoid the stream of pus that was a colonising fleet coming towards your mouth. It’s forever love if you just gargle/wipe it away/ignore, but it’s not forever love if you make a big deal about it/ spend hours disinfecting your mouth.
When you look at him and know that while he is not the world’s sexiest man, he also is the world’s sexiest man (for you) even with that tuft of hair that sticks up from the way he slept.