How valueable is your independence?

Talked to a friend of mine recently, and was catching up as I had not heard from him in some time. He told me a long sob story. TLDR version, hes been married to his wife for a little over a year, and they’ve been sucked into living with his in-laws house so they can use it as a tax shelter while claiming residency in another state (don’t quite understand the details of that). His sister and brother-in-law recently moved in, along with a two month old. Neither work, and play WoW all day. Sis is already behind on her meager contribution to the rent. The stress of all of it is affecting my friend’s work performance.

When I asked why him and his wife don’t just bug out of this horrible mess, he says if they do, his wife will be disowned by their family, and they stand to inherit a huge sum of money. So I guess they are holding out till they in-laws croak and they have this windfall to enjoy.

But it got me wondering, how much is your independence worth? Me, as difficult as things may be, would take the hard road and be able to say I’m living life on my terms, rather than be tyrannized by my in-laws and mooched off by my siblings. What about you guys?

If I were older, I would absolutely agree with you. Right now, though… a poor choice of colleges right out of high school meant that I lost my chance at a scholarship, and the school I’m at now would’ve given me plenty if I came to it straight out of HS, but now not so much. I’m happily choosing a low-paying field I love, but the out-of-state school loans would crush me, so the Bank of Grandma (all to be paid back, just without interest, mind) it is. I’ll tolerate whatever rules to get help with school. The dictates come from a state away, but even if/when we lived in the same house I would take/have taken a lot of truly dysfunctional family situations.

I gave myself a whole DAY for it and then went out and made a MOVIE about the DAY. Yeah, that’s how important it is!

Jokes aside, I’m pretty picky about who I live with. I don’t want to have to play nice with anyone when I’m home, I’m too tired for that.

My independence is verey valueable.

Well, sitting around waiting for people to die so you can have their money is certainly an attractive trait. Somehow I don’t feel sorry for them.

I hope I would never do that. Ew. (Not that I have any wealthy relatives, so it’s a moot point.)

Most of my family including me has a trait of stubbornly sticking to our guns up to and beyond the point of stupidity. I would say fuck the money and be out of there in a flash. Odds are that they couldn’t have got me to move in there in the first place.

Yeah, fuck that. Make your own independence. How many years of living in a shit situation is worth a possible promise of supposed riches? And I simply don’t think going through life with your eye on somebody’s inheritance is a good way to live. I’d be out of there in a second, with no regrets.

Well, while I admire them for having a “when her parent’s die” plan for future happiness rather than a “when we win lotto” plan for future happiness, I’m not all that sure that the “putting up with shit for the sake of committing a tax fraud” part of the plan would be to my liking.

How old are they?

My FIL is 90 today and my MIL is 84. It could be a long wait.

I’m guessing the parents are in their 50’s-60’s.

They are in for a long, long wait.

I’d rather live on my own and be fully independent than under the thumb.

Make money your God and it will hound you like the devil.

I can’t believe the parents want all these people crowded around them like so many vultures, waiting on their death. Ick!

I’d rather live by myself in a cardboard box than with most people. A little money makes life easier, but I’d go back to waiting tables before I’d do what your friends are doing.