So I had this Bridal Shower recently, and I was not very invested in the whole Shower thing, but I obliged my FMIL by getting RSVP’s for friends that said they would come. One of my four close friends said she would be on vacation and unable to come, and the other three responded in the affirmative. I relayed this info back and forgot about it until this Sunday.
I saved a seat for her at my table, because I was happy to have made such good friends here and I wanted her and the others to meet my family, who had travelled from out-of-state. She is from Spain and eats later than the rest of us, plus she is always at least half-an-hour late to anything she attends, so I thought nothing of it when she didn’t show right away, but by the time we wrapped up and I said goodbye, the other girls and I agreed that she must have had an emergency, and that this was unlike her.
Monday went by and no word, so I dropped her an email asking if she was okay and saying I wasn’t upset, which was the truth. No response, but I see an email from her that she sent Friday which I had never read in which she says “See you Sunday.” I freak out a bit and call around because now I’m starting to think she might be in a ditch somewhere, since she obviously meant to go.
The other girls and I leave her messages, and Tuesday evening I finally get a hold of her. She sounds weird and definitely not happy to hear from me, and I get a flashback to my other friend’s recent shower, how much she hated it, how she complained that in Spain this wasn’t done, about not wanting to ever go to one again, etc. I get the realization she may not have want to come, but I decide to ask her if she’s okay anyways because I’d hate to assume. She said she woke up “so-so” that morning and then her Internet was down, and she couldn’t tell me that she wasn’t going to come because she didn’t have Internet, then Monday she was shopping with her boyfriend and forgot to email me, and then Tuesday day she had gone out to lunch and was tired from it and now she comes to see people are blowing up her phone and she doesn’t know why. Her tone was bored and she didn’t sound her usual self. I felt like an idiot for worrying she might be hurt.
Now, I can’t say enough that I don’t care about her shower attendance, but what hurts is that she’s being rude and deceptive for no reason. She has my home and cell #s, and she could have just left me a voicemail saying she was too sick to come, or had a last-minute emergency, or that she simply didn’t have a good time at the other shower and didn’t want to come. I would have understood and crossed her name off with no hard feelings, but now I feel like maybe we aren’t as close as I thought and I’m sad and disappointed in how she handled it.