I am in Delaware.

Yes. It appears to actually exist.

Head up 95 – you’ll be back in civilization soon enough.

My condolences. I interviewed for a job there once. The only store in town was a Wal-Mart, and it was unbelievably hot and humid.

I’m sure there are nice places in Delaware, especially around, say, Wilmington. But I would’ve gone insane if I moved to that town.

Look off to your left – you’ll see a group of Marylanders snickering and giggling about “fooling another one”.

Oooh - I just looked on a map - it’s so LITTLE! What a cute little state!

I don’t believe you. “Oh, look at me! I’m in Delaware on Halloween. Ooooo, spooky”

I’ve heard it all before.

:: takes thumb off firing button of orbiting 1920s’ style death ray, puts safety back on, and irritably turns away from doomsday console::

Okay, maybe I was unclear. When I said, “Hey, Dopers, stay out of Delaware on Halloween on account of my new evil destroy-Delaware plan,” I meant THIS Halloweeen. Not NEXT Halloween.

Sheesh. With you guys pulling crap like this, no wonder I’m not God-King.

Don’t listen to those other people.
Delaware can be good. Sometimes. Well…occasionally.

RUN

Well, it would’ve been, until Happy went and screwed up Skald’s plans.

They’ve got a nice bridge.

My family stopped in Delaware for gas once. You had to pay inside before they would turn on the pump, but the guy at the counter was so busy arguing with his girlfriend that he didn’t notice my dad trying to hand him a credit card.

It is only nice because you can use it to leave.

Welcome. Where you be? Give a holler, maybe we’ll do lunch. No…really…give a holler, I’ll probably hear you. :smiley:
Nevermind those silly Marylanders, they’re just jealous.

Jealous of what pray tell?

Slot machines, that’s why we want our own.

Exactly!

Okay, my random thoughts from today:

-I haven’t looked at a map of Delaware since I’ve been here (or ever, that I can recall) until just now. I heard people talking about “downstate” and “upstate.” Since I drove north from Baltimore, and as my exit was very close to the Maryland border, I assumed I was “downstate.” But nope; I’m actually in “upstate” Delaware. Newark, to be exact. I just assumed I had entered the state from the south. And yes, I truly have no concept of how New England is laid out.

-U-turns are not only acceptable on very busy roads here, they’re actually encouraged.

-It’s much more rural than I would’ve ever imagined it to be.

-I don’t think I had ever seen a Delaware licence plate until today.

-Every person I encountered, I thought to myself “Oh my gosh, you’re actually a Delaware resident,” and I’d walk away feeling like I’d just met a leprechaun, unicorn, the yeti or some other mythical beast.

I don’t believe you. When I was in a car driving from Washington to Philadelphia, I said “I’ve never been to Delaware.” Then they took me on some roundabout route, muttering something about ‘traffic,’ and avoiding the state altogether! It’s a conspiracy!

Ok, you just blew your cover with this one (shot your load as you will).

  1. I have no idea why you are referring to New England. Go up a few hundred miles if New England was your real destination.

  2. Upstate and downstate are terms used for New York. Again, Delaware is not in New York (or anywhere else for that matter).

  3. Newark is in New Jersey. Again, that is probably closer but it doesn’t sound like you are there either.

Either you are typing while slowly suffering from the effects of carbon monoxide poisoning or you have had and elaborate Halloween joke played on you. Do you actually hear road noise when you “drive” in your car? What you describe is such a horribly mangled mismash of things that it is, frankly, cause for concern.

Is there a phone with 911 service nearby that can pinpoint your real location? If one of us pulled some strings to get you into a rehab tonight, would you go?

Hey, where I come from anything north of the White House and east of Lake Erie is New England.

Listen, if George Thorogood, a damn good cover blues/rock player is from Delaware, it can’t be all that bad.

Tripler
Yeah, I got a tombstone on a ball and chain.