I am wasting bandwidth and compromising the mission of the SDMB!

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#1

I don’t have a question to ask!

I’m not here to explain the concept of the event horizon!

I have no firsthand experience with complicated machinery!
Yet, my post went through anyway!
Someone call a moderator and have me taken away!
Oh, and fix the relevance filters!
-There are Catholics who will walk around with a pebble in their shoe so that they have a constant iscomfort which they can endure for the souls in Purgatory.
-When I did Union Summer, there was a shrill yet vocal minority who wouldn’t go sightseeing or get a beer because that would be time spent away from helping the downtrodden.
-There are people I’ve met who will not buy branded clothing (of any kind) because there is a sweatshop somewhere out there.
And if that’s your thing, sweet. You’ve got your issue, and you’re welcome to it.
But jeez, stop beating the rest of us over the head with your superiority. It’s hard for you to carry on the fight against ignorance[super]tm[/super] with all us useless civilians underfoot. We’re trying to get out of your way, honest- please don’t kick us in the ass to help us along.
Fighting the ignorance is nice. One of the reasons I subscribe here is because burning questions get answered. Just the other day, the girlfriend and I were wondering about the difference between Coke Zero and Diet Coke, and now we know.

But let’s be honest. It’s a message board.
Nowhere in MPSIMS are you going to get your ignince fighted, except as one hell of a fluke.
It is unlikely that the Pit will educate you, unless the new knowledge is being used as a club.
IMHO is as much a crapshoot as trying to get an informed opinion anywhere else.
So, in closing, please, allow me to keep the home fires burnin’ while big bad you is off fightin the war. Just don’t smack me around when you get home and yell, “bitch, where be my dinner?”

That is all.

#2

You probably one of them Ketchup Eaters, too! Ain’tcha, boy??

#3

Actually, this would seem to be a veiled comment on some moderator action, so it is, in fact, relevant and appropriately placed. Good form, son. Keep up the good work.

#4

Nothing like the virgin purity of an uncluttered mind, eh?! :wink:

#5

Actually it seems like another skirmish in the never-ending MPSIMS vs. Pit vs. GQ war. Of course there wouldn’t be a war if people didn’t expect every forum to suit their interests but that’s too simple.

Now let’s see…Nice little brouhaha already cooking: Check, for relevance. Probability of heated responses: Check for placement. Comment on moderator action: too veiled to tell, but with any luck it’ll be Giraffe, the weenie, so it check there too.

Veb

#6

Now, that’s not entirely true. We have some of the best debates in the Pit. That is, until some crazy-assed moderator shows up and heaves them into the lofty heights of Great Debates.

Oh, hi,** Veb**, didn’t see you there. {insert cheese-eating smiley}

#7

No, it’s not a comment on moderator action of any kind.

The impetus from the thread comes directly from comments like this one from this thread:

(I am not including the poster’s name because I am not Pitting the poster, I’m pitting the lame attitude which is not unique to that poster.)

Dude, chill. And at your meeting of Dudes Who Hate Posts Not Specifically Designed To Save The World Anonymous, tell your sponsor and your circle that I said chill, too.
To sum up:

Posters: Don’t like, don’t read, shut up.
Moderators: Do as I say and clean up my messes.
The moderators can do what they like with the “newbie” threads, because I don’t read them. In fact, they can do what they like with any thread I don’t read. So, moderators, if you’re thinking about taking any action, just e-mail me to see if it’s OK, and it generally will be.

But, re: mod interference, specifically Veb:

What’s the deal with not fixing my screwed-up coding? The jackbooted interference is only good when it suits YOU, eh? At least under Mussolini, the trains ran on time.

#8

Nuh-UH!

This ignorance-fighting brought to you by the letter N.

#9

Tsk, tsk, Pup. E-mail consultations were abandoned when we inexplicably lost contact with Bosda. Panic ensued, and so did penis, though not on my part…er, lacking the part, so to speak.
And your little coding problem? Chump change, pal. I must go persecute the innocent, quash discussions, stifle debate and hunt down those whose political opinions don’t tally with mine. Mere coding must wait.

#10

Veb, Veb, wait! You forgot your jackboots!

How can you mod without them?

#11

Threads like this make me very happy. I guess this means that I am mere cannon fodder in the war on ignorance. Or possibly even a draft-dodger.

#12

I am going to report this thread to the nearest junior mod.

#13

You rang? :smiley:

#14

You people can’t fight in here. This is a war room.

#15

Don’t worry, I’m on it.

#16

Welll, this thread sure erupted into flames while I was at work. Sheesh, I’ve seen more heat and light from an anemic lightning bug.

Oh well. Can’t predict 'em all.

Off to MPSIMS.

Veb

#17

The irony!!! Yeowwch!
I’d say the Pitizens played this one perfectly.

#18

That thread contains some of the funniest sarcasm and insults I’ve heard in quite a while. And being that this is MPSIMS, I just thought I would share it with you. I especially liked the delicious “stick…asses” remark. I think I might make that my sig.

“Holy fuck, get the stick out of your asses.”

I also liked how the posters would post something remotely MPSIMS-ish, then pit themselves for it.

#19

But did you remember your Secret Junior Mod Decoder Ring? Can’t be an effective Junior Mod without it!

#20

Drum roll…rim shot! Or maybe grapeshot in this case.