I didn't need to know that!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

The things people are willing to share.

I had my office mate today tell me in detail about how a drug allowed him to relieve the congestion in his lungs, I didn’t need to know.

I have people share with me about their bowel movements, like how they have diarrhea, I didn’t need to know.

I once had a guy who would be my technician say “do you know how long it has been since I have had sex?” I responded with “I don’t want to know”, but he told me anyhow. This was done in front of other people. I had a friend say he was just trying to flirt but we were working together and I was the supervisor, but I didn’t need to know.

Here is where you can tell about those thing people share that you didn’t want to know.

2

I know exactly what you’re talkin about. I HATE when people just come out and say stuff like, “Boy my hemrhoids are really killing me” or “Man I’ve had diarrhea for 2 weeks”. I’m thinkin, “Man, I DID NOT NEED TO KNOW THAT!”
My parents are like that sometimes, only not with disgusting stuff, usually normal stuff, but its stuff i don’t give a damn about and it seems like they will never shut up. Can’t people learn to keep their info to themselves ONCE IN A WHILE!?!?!? :mad:

3

You obviously haven’t been reading The TMI Thread, have you?

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=44749

enjoy.

–sublight.

4

I spent all last Thursday and Friday talking about an extended stretch of puking I had just suffered. I try not to talk about puking all that much, but it had practically destroyed my voice and people were curious.

5

Once my mother in law decided to share her marital sexual problems with me. Ewwwwwww. I really did not need to know that her arthritis prevents her from kneeling down like my father in law likes. <shudder>

6

There’s this guy running around the office here telling several of his friends that he’s never had unprotected sex.

Oh, wait a second, that’s me.

The reason is, I’ve been named in an child support case, and I’m having a difficult time getting any information about it. Obviously it’s a case of mistaken identity (when I called to get it cleared up, and gave information about myself, I was told “there are some discrepancies between my self-description and the description of the father”. Well, no duh! It AIN’T ME!)

What really pisses me off, though, is that I can’t even get the name of the individual petitioning for child support. You know, the one that gave birth to “my baby”. Or whether the child is a boy or a girl. Or when the suit was filed. Or any other damned bit of information. I cannot believe the interference I’m getting over this fairly basic information. (If I’m not mistaken, the suit should be a matter of public record.)

This is actually the opposite of the OP, I guess: “I DO need to know that, I’m getting really pissed off that no one will tell me!”

Meanwhile, I’m regaling people with Mel Gibson impressions (too bad I don’t look like him) from one of his movies:

"GIVE ME BACK MY SON!!"

Hey, I could tell my co-workers I’m impotent. That would be something they didn’t need to know. (Besides being, I hope, untrue.)

7

I had a New York City cabbie tell me about the fluid that comes out of his ears, among other things.

8

I am so sorry you are having such problems DRY. It must be very difficult for you to have your character assasinated like this. I hope everything works out quickly for you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

{{{{DRY}}}}

9

The other day I was sitting at my desk eating lunch. The woman who works in the next room came over with a little glass jar. She take something metal out of it, says “here”, and hands it to me. I didn’t take it, I just asked what it was. Turns out, it’s the metal plate she had installed on her spine from a neck injury she got in a car accident. Her doctor had removed that one and replaced it with another.

She thought it was funny to hand it to me while I was eating. Lovely.

10

C3 … eeewwwwwwwww. I can kind of relate to that.

Yesterday I was sitting in class and I noticed that the guy sitting next to me smelled. Really bad. After about 20 minutes he got up and left the room. I breathed. I rejoiced.

He came back maybe five or ten minutes later, still smelly but not as offensive as before. After class he asked me if I had smelled him during class (how do you answer a question like that honestly?), then proudly pulled up his foot and displayed his sneaker full of dog crap.

He went on to explain in great detail how he had tried to scrape it out of his shoe, but couldn’t get it all. I kept trying to figure out why he would brag to everyone that he stepped in something (not to mention that I had to thoroughly check my coat and backpack, since he had been kicking his legs under the desk).

11

Good Heavens, DRY! I wish I could think of something more profound to say…

Being a vet nurse, I talk about gross stuff all the time, and my other vet/vet nurse friends don’t even notice. But I don’t want to hear anything about HUMANS…icky. Thankfully, I don’t have a tale to relate.

12

twice over:

Once to each of them for expressing their concerns.

Once more to deb2world for being so gracious about my hijack of her thread.

And once more to Cyndar for being Michi.

I think I screwed up the tenor of my last post: it’s not so much infuriating as it is laughable, mixed with a little bit of irritation. The chances of my actually getting in any kind of trouble are pretty darned remote (famous last words).

The father in question isn’t me. It couldn’t possibly be. I expect that they’ll have me out of the lawsuit within one week. They MAY already have gotten me out of the lawsuit, since I provided them with some proof about me yesterday. This is a case of mistaken identity, not character assassination. (Unless I’m REALLY mistaken.)

I was very irritated on Friday, because I called the 800 number for the LA District Attorney, Department of Child Services (deb2world, because I know you live in So. Cal, so take heed if you ever have to call them). This is an automated voice mail system, and at some point you’re supposed to be able to speak to a social worker, or some such. Except I couldn’t. I tried to enter several options to speak to a human voice. No go. Called 8 times and must have wasted over an hour.

They have a webpage. I go there. Get the phone number of some administrative contact person. Call. Leave message.

I try e-mailing the address on the webpage. No response.

I then call a former co-worker, who now works in another department of the DA’s office. Leave ANOTHER message.

By this time, I’m getting more than a little pissed off, as you can imagine. Wondering where the hell everyone is, like that Twilight Zone episode where the guy’s all alone. Though everyone in OUR office is here. What the hell happened to the LA DA’s office. It just vanish?

And it’s right around now that I find out that it’s a county holiday. Everyone’s on vacation. (I’m not, of course.)

So I waste a whole day, and there’s nothing I can do except laugh off my stupidity. (Though you have to think that the Department of Child Services could at least have put a cover message on their voice mail system that no one would be in due to the holiday.)

But yesterday, I do get through to someone. The only real frustrating thing is that they wouldn’t give me the name of the person who’s the mother. (I’m thinking they HAVE to do this, since such suits are a matter of public record. There’s also the obvious point that I need to know who this person is, so I can figure out whether it’s a case of mistaken identity, or whether I actually know the person in question.)

Even though they won’t give me the name of the person, I do expect to eventually be able to get all the court documents. Even if I have to drive to the damned hall of records to do so. And I WILL get this thing straightened out, and shortly, too.

Ironic part of all this is that I don’t have an SO and would LOVE to have kids one day. I would want them to be MINE, however.

13

DRY,
I think you should just file for custody. You love kids, this is almost like having one…isn’t it?

d&r

Seriously, I’m sure it will work out, as you are, so just relax a bit in the meantime. And keep us updated. The chances for humor in this situation are many and varied with the right attitude. Wasn’t there some dead guy who wrote plays about mistaken identities on occasion?

14

DRY, what if this is all some massive plot by an ex-girlfriend because she’s pissed at you. You know, she has a kid, and says, “Hey, why don’t I say it’s his and make him pay child support?”
Then again, I’m probably wrong. Well, either way, I hope you get it sorted out soon. Good Luck, man!

15

MonsterM52– I figure the odds are about 1000 to one that it’s an ex of mine. (I don’t have that many, and none of them hate me passionately. Besides, you can’t get blood from a turnip, and they know this.)

It’s almost certainly a case of mistaken identity. JUST IN CASE, though, I’m trying to find out who the petitioner (mother) is. Well, for that reason AND in case whoever this person is sues the wrong “Dan Young”. I’ll be able to tell the appropriate people about the previous error in the child support suit.

I really expect this to be settled in a week or two. Thanks for the good wishes, though!

I have a funny feeling I’ve figured out exactly who the mother is…

All right, so I lied about being impotent. :wink:

16

It was probably some Doper figuring if he pretended he was DRY he’d get some. He did.

When I tried it I wasn’t believeable enough.

17

laughs!

Its that adorable sensitivity of DRY’s (oh and that Shakespeare thing)

And why weren’t you believeable lurker?

18

It’s not that he wasn’t believeable, he just wouldn’t take the hint that I’m simply not interested in sex with another man.

19

Not that I’m one to perpetuate a hijack, but (a) Dan Young has to be a pretty common name (b) the suit probably hasn’t been filed yet and © there are all sorts of privacy rules relating to child service agencies. Most likely your name came up in the prefiling investigation because some other Dan Young is a putative father.

You don’t have a reputation interest here; the same rules that prevent you from finding out who the mother is prevents other people from finding out that you were a possible putative father (unless, of course, you tell them).

20

Well, you raise a good point KellyM, and I thank you.

Actually, I should add that I was involved with helping my cousin in another child support lawsuit. This lawsuit was actually filed, and I helped gather information about it, so this is why I know that a suit, once filed is normally a matter of public record. Furthermore, the original piece of correspondence sent me referenced a case number format that was different from my cousin’s case number (his had a “BY” prefix). This lends credence to your hypothesis that the lawsuit hadn’t been filed yet.

However, yesterday, I received an acknowledgment from the DA’s office (I faxed them copies of my driver’s license, social security card, and pay stub to verify personal information that I gave them, and they were acknowledging receipt of same). This acknowledgment DID reference a case with a “BY” prefix.

So it would appear that a lawsuit HAS been filed. At least this might make it possible for me to get more information on the case.