I don't WANT to smell like Paris!

In My Humble Opinion
1

Or Britney. Or Jessica. Or Sarah Jessica. Or Kim Phat Baby whatever. Or Gwyneth. Or J-Lo. Or, for that matter, Liz.

Obviously, though, this is a selling point, some kind of marketing maneuver that works very, very well, and I am once again on the opposite side of a fad.

I am hereby boycotting all fragrances named after a live celebrity! I am convinced that by this action I will alter the course of histery.

Y’know, I don’t even care if the fragrances named after these celebs smell good. They are tainted by association. But in fact as far as I can tell these eponymous effluvia don’t smell any better than your average, everyday knockoff from Walgreens.

Oh well. Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. Or their sense of smell, either. Truer today than ever before.

(Just in case anybody misunderstood, I don’t want to smell like certain cities in Texas and France, either.)

2

…or maybe I will altar the curse of hystory.

3

I think Sarah Jessica Parker’s Lovely is a decent scent (and I am neither American, nor “public” - I have some thirty scents in my collection and I’ve sniffed many, many more). Even Britney’s Curious isn’t horrible, just really, really fruity. If you liked bubble gum, you’d like this.

4

Yi, if there’s a “Curious” Britney that means she’s got more than one! I got a whole bunch of samples, half of which were celeb scents, and my Britney was something about a dream.

You’re right, it didn’t stink. It wasn’t really exceptional. The one I had kinda smelled like grape drink. But it’s the names!

(Really I have nothing against Sarah Jessica Parker. Or any of them. I just deplore this marketing trend.)

5

Didn’t Miss Piggy have her own perfume some years back? That would be a scent I’d be proud to wear, if I wore perfume, which I don’t because it makes my eyes burny.

6

The endorsement crap is horrible, I know. But the sad truth is that attaching a random, well-known name to a scent will sell it. Unless, of course, that name is Donald Trump.

7

Yep. And there was also a Spongbob cologne.

8

It would be more honest to name it ‘equine’ though, IMO.

9

As a bloke, I’m quite tempted to get me some Cumming the Fragrance. It almost seems like a parody of the whole signature scent deal, and the entendres in the product names are aparently his revenge on the world for growing up with the name Cumming, but I have a gut feel that the scent is probably pretty good.

Who doesn’t want to smell like whiskey, leather, rubber, and cigars?

10

I’m afraid to know what Paris smells like… stale alcohol, cigarette smoke, burnt rubber and bodily fluids? The mind reels.

11

There used to be an ad for Caswell-Massey colognes that had, in big bold type:
Smell like George Washington!
Our first pres. was a customer at C-M (which has old roots), and always ordered the same fragrance, for which they still have the recipe (or so their advertising states), so you apparently really could smell like the big GW.
I note that, if this is all on the level, he actually used the stuff, and didn’t endorse it. That places him way above Paris, britney, and company.

12

Caswell-Massey page on Washington:

http://www.caswellmassey.com/content/ourcompany/gateway/article/articlemain.jsp?itemID=22&FoldID=21

13

but…smelling like paris, you wouldn’t smell like spongebob…

you’d smell like bob’s spooge.

yeah, i’m happy over this one.

14

Personally, I cannot wear perfume becaue my nose is so sensitive all I smell is the alcohol base to it after about 20min. on my skin. I’ve spent thousands of dollars in my youth trying to find a signature scent.

I want to be a part of this crowd. ( Not the celebrity perfumery stuff) but it pains me to even attempt a walk through the perfume section at stores.
I would love to get a chance to whiff cummings which sounds like it would be a veyr unique smell. A manly smell. Not for me, maybe for Mr. Ujest. Or just for whiffing. Thanks for the heads up on this smelly.

I also am partial to a nice bay rum smelly.

15

All kidding aside, I bought the second incarnation of Paris Hilton’s perfume for my stepdaughter for Christmas. I bought it from the girl at the counter without sampling it. I just knew that if it had Paris Hilton’s name and/or picture on the packaging, my stepdaughter would love it no matter what. She’s sixteen and thoroughly star-struck, after all.

Surprisingly, it smells pretty good. I’ve even sneaked a few spritzes when my stepdaughter isn’t home.

16

Some of the most interesting scents ever composed have leather (Serge Lutens’ Daim Blond, Chanel’s Cuir de Russie, Piguet’s Bandit), rubber (Thierry Mugler’s Angel for Men) and tobacco (D&G’s Pour Homme, Creed’s Tabarome) notes in them.

Shirley, you might want to look into Frederic Malle’s Musc Ravageur, an incredibly potent musk oriental (vanilla, amber, a bit of spicy stuff). If you email them at their website they’ll send you two or three 5ml sample sprays. Ask for Musk Ravageur and Noir Epices. Or, if you want even stranger stuff, Comme des Garcons makes some pretty out-there scents. Their Incense series is very wearable, and their Odeurs 53 and 71 have such notes as

“Freshness of Oxygen, Flash of Metal, Fire Energy, Washing drying in the wind.”

and

“Electricity, Metal, Office, Mineral, Dust on a hot light bulb, photocopier toner, Hot metal, Toaster, fountain pen ink, Pencil Shavings, The salty taste of a battery”

Creed’s stuff is a celebrity favorite. Green Irish Tweed, of which Cool Water is a poor imitation, is one of their best-selling fragrances. There’s also Spring Flower, composed for Audrey Hepburn, Bois du Portugal, which Frank Sinatra was into, and even one named Jasmin Impératrice Eugénie, although I’m not quite sure why.

Cumming, by the way, is one of those love-it-or-hate-it scents. IMO it smells like old jackets near a shoe rack, which is exactly what the list of notes suggests.

17

Oh. I was thinking of Paris, the city. What does Paris smell like? Bread and traffic, I’m thinking? Some river smell, too?

18

While I’m sad that she’s gone, I’m really glad Divine wasn’t around long enough to get her own perfume.

19

You forgot about Shania, for those who buy their fragrances at Wal-Mart.

20

Thanks for the suggestions! They are noted and I shall email the company! YAY!