I eat Kleenex. What problems should I experience?

[Insecta]

I’m British, so if I had my way the OP would read ‘I eat tissues’, but I’m not sure if everyone here would understand it. I hope you can say ‘I eat Kleenex’, forgive me if you can’t.

Now to address the actual topic.

I have been eating Kleenex for about three years. Usually I consume the regular plain ones produced by Kleenex themselves. Sometimes it’s fresh toilet paper or kitchen towels. I put them in my mouth so I can chew them, and then usually forget to take them out and swallow them. On average, I must swallow from ten to twenty Kleenex a day. I feel that chewing them helps me think better. It’s also a good time passer, and mostly just a habit. I don’t find chewing gum provides enough ‘meatyness’. A whole pack of gum often does not come close to the size of just one Kleenex. I only do it at home.

People around me are horrified and tell me to stop or to think of the damage it’s doing to me. I have quit several times with relative ease, but the habit always returns, probably corresponding with a heavy workload. The fact is that although I know eating Kleenex is not natural, there don’t appear to be any ill effects. I have, however, observed the following:

1: It satisfies my hunger, although I would never eat Kleenex for that reason.

2: When I still had braces chewing kitchen towel caused a few brackets to snap off. Kleenex and toilet paper do not do this, and I know longer have braces anyhow. Agreed, this was an ill-effect.

3: It makes me thirsty, presumably due to the dryness of the Kleenex.

4: When I excrete, it usually floats but never requires any wiping. This is actually a positive effect.

5: It cleans plague off my teeth, at least along the bottom. My dentist observed that my teeth were strangely clean along the bottom. Perhaps it even bleaches them. This is also a positive effect.

My concerns over the habit arise from the following things:

1: Bleach and other chemicals.

2: Dryness of Kleenex. Possible dehydration, although I don’t think I’ve experienced this.

3: Kleenex not passing through my digestive system.

I would like to kick the habit and am I about to make a concentrated attempt to drop it for good. But I’m still curious to what the effects are.

Help me out dopers! What does Kleenex do to me?

[BeatenMan]

I would say the long term affects are…snot known…

[hajario]

Just for the hell of it, I Googled “eating Kleenex.” I got about three pages of hits, about all of them home pages describing the behavior of people’s pet dogs. Maybe you should call the number on the back of the box. You know, the one where they ask for questions and comments from consumers.

Haj

[Tristan]

Kleenex, being a form of paper(celluslose) will not be digested by your system. I think.

Also, you are probably Obsessive Compulsive. Can you quit, if you try? Do you find yourself eating Kleenex and such, despite ill effects, both physically and socially?

[Ice_Wolf]

Eating paper tissues is referred to here as an eating disorder, and can lead to blockage in the digestive system.

Dunno. Personally, I wouldn’t do it, stress relieving oral habit or no. The chemicals used in today’s paper processing alone would put me off.

[Kat]

Actually, I imagine that you could pick up a box of Kleenex with “no dyes, no bleach, no (etc.)”, just like I have my All Free & Clear and my Bounce Free of dyes and perfumes.

[El_Zagna]

This is a disorder known as pica. Google on eating paper pica and see if that helps. I’m pretty sure it’s also been discussed on these boards.

[astro]

Kleenex manufacturing FAQ

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Is KLEENEX® Facial Tissue biodegradable? Flushable?
KLEENEX® Tissue is made with biodegradable cellulose fibers. Because the tissue is made with an additive to make it strong, it will not break down as rapidly as bathroom tissue. Therefore, we suggest you discard KLEENEX® Facial Tissue in the trash.

What types of trees are used to manufacture KLEENEX® Facial Tissue?

Selected tree species, including spruce, fir, aspen, maple and eucalyptus contain thin wood fibers which contribute to the desirable characteristics of softness, absorbency and strength in KLEENEX® Tissue.

Where do we get our pulp?

High-quality KLEENEX® Tissue requires high-quality cellulose fibers. Pulp is purchased from a number of different sources. Approximately one-third of the pulp used is supplied by Kimberly-Clark’s own pulp mills. Kimberly-Clark conducts a well-planned forest management and reforestation program that ensures a supply of pulpwood for present and future needs.

Select wood is either transported to the pulp mill in the form of chips from lumber processing or as logs. The logs are washed, debarked and cut into small, uniform chips. Individual cellulose fibers are separated by “cooking” the wood. The pulp is then processed and dried into sheets on a pulp drying machine. These sheets are baled for ease of handling and shipping, ready for manufacture into the final product.

Describe the manufacturing process for KLEENEX® Facial Tissue.
Pulp manufacturing mills are usually near the wood source, while tissue manufacturing mills are located close to major markets. At the tissue manufacturing mills, the bales of pulp are put into a hydrapulper, which resembles a giant electric mixer. The pulp is mixed with water to form a pulp slurry of individual fibers in water known as stock or furnish.

As the stock moves to the machine, more water is added to make a thinner mixture which is more than 99 percent water. The cellulose fibers are then thoroughly separated in refiners before being formed into a web, or sheet, on the forming section of the creped wadding machine. When the sheet comes off the machine a few seconds later, it is 95 percent fiber and only 5 percent water. Typically, much of the water used in the process is recycled. Water not reused is treated to remove contaminants prior to discharge. Careful controls and monitoring ensure that the water leaving the mill meets or exceeds water quality standards.

A felt belt carries the sheet from the forming section to the drying section. In the drying section, the sheet is pressed onto the steam-heated drying cylinder and then scraped off the cylinder after it has been dried. The sheet is then wound into large rolls
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