I got my hand down my pants

[sleeping]

@Portia

Alright, I live in Oakland County, outside of Detroit; it’s the wealthiest part of the State of Michigan (though I sure as HELL ain’t), and I see young men only, of all races, walking and standing around my college campus full-on holding a handful of what appears to be their pants and/or genitals. Now, I think the physical purpose is two-fold; their pants are quite baggy and unbelted, so as to nearly fall down, and they enjoy holding their man bits. And socially, they’re announcing their membership in the club of sheep that emulate the hip hop culture from a safe distance. When I first saw it, I snickered at them out right and was given ‘looks’ that were evidently supposed to shush or frighten me. I couldn’t help it; it reminded me of two little boys I used to baby-sit for who would hold their fronts as a sign of needing the bathroom.

Portia has it. White guys who try to copy the rap/hip-hop culture (“wiggers”) do it too. And, yes, it’s pretty fucking annoying.

Actually, you know what? From now on, every time any guy I know sticks his hand down his pants, I’m going to ask him, very loudly, “Hey, why do you have your hand on your crotch?” Then I’ll revel in their embarassment.

[Rysdad]

@look!ninjas

You sexist bastards! A woman can grab her crotch every bit as well as a man. There can be no true equality until women have the same groin-cupping opportunities as men!

Madonna grabs groin with the best of 'em.

[wonky]

Okay, I’m confused. Is this a front-of-pants grabbing or a down-the-pants grabbing? Because I think Jim Thome is the current king of front-of-pants grabbing, with all that entails. There are obviously conflicting details in these enlightening thread anecdotes!

Julie

[Biggirl]

When flaccid, the Negro penis is 20 to 30 inches long and must be kept coiled. It is usually held against the upper thigh, although there have been recordings of the penis coiling around the leg of The Negro and ending up tucked into his sock.

The Negro, when out in the field and not in his den, MUST occasionally put his hands down the front of his pants in order to gain control of the massive male member lest it frighten those with less melanin.

As has been noted by the esteemed Negro Penis archaeologist ccwaterback, this behavior can cause concern amongst the Caucasians who sometimes share The Negro’s habitat.

If you are in the vicinity of a Negro displaying this type of behavior, the wisest course of action would be to use the greeting call used by many males of the species (printed here phonetically):

HOW’S IT HANGING

and give him fifty dollars.

[ccwaterback]

The last several sporting events I have been to, there has been a noticeable decline of crotch-grabbing by the spectators. Perhaps crotch-grabbers are an endangered species? I think, perhaps, the elders have whacked the crotch-grabbers on the side of the head, and exclaimed, “What the hell is wrong with you?”, enough times to curb this bad habit. We can only hope.

[labmonkey]

Biggirl , laughing my ass off a 3:30 AM. Thank you.