Peristalsis, peristalsis
The bowels move
The bowels move
Plop into the water,
my bowels moved …
handbasket ride to hell for me :smack:
Geologist call it “mass movement”.
Blue color workers call it a “labor movement.”
Thank you *so *much for that… I needed another earworm. :0)
Conversation I overheard today in a quiet store, between a boy about 7 years old and his mom:
Kid: what is that, mom?
Mom: Something to make my bowels move.
Kid: What?
Mom: something to make me poop.
Kid: poop? you mean shit?
Mom: yeah, something to make me shit.
Kid: OK
As a nurse, I ask people every day if their bowels have moved. I had no idea so many people dislike the phrase!
Several years ago I wrote the openinng lyrics to a blues song that, to this day, I still like:
mmm
Yes, but it’s much better when it’s Tylenol BMwith Alec Baldwin (video).
Bri2k
“Mine have moved all over town with me today. First we went to Target, then to the grocery store…”
Bowels no move!
(Warning–link also contains a video with sound.)
I honestly can’t understand why people would dislike the term “bowel movement” more than “poop” or “doo-doo”.
In Soviet Russia, bowels move you!
I find it a great source of juvenile amusement to search for the word “bowels” in the King James Bible.
Song of Solomon 5:4
My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him.
Lamentations 1:20
Behold, O LORD; for I am in distress: my bowels are troubled
2 Samuel 16:11
And David said to Abishai, and to all his servants, Behold, my son, which came forth of my bowels, seeketh my life
Genesis 43:30
And Joseph made haste; for his bowels did yearn upon his brother
2 Chronicles 21:15
And thou shalt have great sickness by disease of thy bowels, until thy bowels fall out by reason of the sickness day by day.
Job 30:27
My bowels boiled, and rested not: the days of affliction prevented me.
Isaiah 16:11
Wherefore my bowels shall sound like an harp for Moab
Philippians 1:8
For God is my record, how greatly I long after you all in the bowels of Jesus Christ.
Philemon 1:20
Yea, brother, let me have joy of thee in the Lord: refresh my bowels in the Lord.
Jeremiah 4:19
My bowels, my bowels! I am pained at my very heart; my heart maketh a noise in me; I cannot hold my peace, because thou hast heard, O my soul, the sound of the trumpet, the alarm of war.
Poop shit crap dookie caca. Take a dump. Have a grumpy. Drop a log. Lay some cable. Shake hands with Mr. Brown. See a man about a horse.
We call it a Code Brown on da bambulamps…or around the little old ladies, we refer to someone baking the brownies…
I once visited a preschool (in Cambridge, Mass, naturally), where I was solemnly told by one of the teachers that they encourage the kids to say “BM” because “they don’t believe in euphemism.” I didn’t have the bowels to tell her that “BM” was in fact a euphemism for a euphemism.
I don’t see the necessity of discussing this even with other words, euphemisms or graphic ones!
I also intensely dislike people getting all excited about cleaning their colon from toxic waste products! My sister put it in a way I appreciate: she says she expects her colon to clean itself.
After doing the mommy business when my kids were little, and listening to all the poo-poo jokes when they were growing up, I’m ready to graduate to something else.
~VOW
Word for word, this is what I came in to post.
The shit you say.
peristalis, peristalis
cannot poo, cannot poo
could not make a code brown
cause my bowels are locked down
cannot poo, cannot poo
I find it appropriate that the previous poster’s name rhymes with “laxative.”