I moved into a new neighborhood about a year and a half ago. I have some neighbors who live on the other side of the block from me; about five houses down. Until now, there really hasn’t been anything between us and them - nothing good or bad. We rarely see each other and that’s it.
Tonight, they had a party. My wife and I had gone out to a small affair tonight as well, but when we came back at about midnight, we saw that the party was still ongoing. It was all fine and well until we tried to go to sleep at about 2:00AM. There were a group of people from the party standing in the street and talking…loudly. In addition, the music was also audible in our bedroom. I know that my wife and i must be old fuddy-duddys to be trying to sleep on a Saturday night at two in the morning, but we actually have to get the kids up for school in the morning. We tried to put up with it for about a half hour. Eventually, my wife had had enough.
“Should I call the police?” my wife asked me.
“No,” I replied. “Let’s try being nice first.” So I got up, put on some clothing and a coat and walked down the block to where the group was standing. I respectfully explained to them that they were speaking quite loudly and that they were keeping me up.
Now, I had hoped for a simple acquiescence. After all, common courtesy dictates that you don’t speak loudly in the street at half past two in the morning. Instead, all I got was a denial that they were speaking loudly, an accusation of wanting to bother them only because they were black, and another accusation of trying to eavesdrop on their conversation. I tried to reason with them, but to no avail. The final remark from the person I was speaking with was “so call the cops.”
Well, my wife called the cops and they responded. It’s been quieter since then. I’m just wondering what sort of retaliation, if any, I might expect in the future for my wife calling the cops to break up the party.
Does anyone have any experience with this sort of thing?
My experience has been: don’t try and be nice first. Just call the cops. That way the problem is solved, and 1)You don’t have to deal with a bunch of drunks, and 2)The neighbors won’t know who brought the fuzz down on them.
I wouldn’t really worry about it though. But I would hold off on that 10-kegger you and the wife have been planning, at least until those particular neighbors move away.
In situations like that, it’s better to just go ahead and call the cops. That’s disturbing the peace. I’m sorry, but you probably shouldn’t have gone out there because now they know it was probably your family who called. On the (somewhat) bright side, it sounds like it was a fairly sizable party and often when it’s that large, the hosts probably were having a hard time trying to manage the level of noise–they may even be (privately) glad that someone called the cops. Try not to worry too much about any retaliation.
Back in my youth I’ve had big parties before and a few that leaked into the wee hours ended with a visit from the PD.
I didn’t like the PD shutting us down but I was never angry at the person who called. We were the ones in the wrong and we all knew it when we hear the PD bang on the door.
Well now wait a minute. People seem to be assuming Loud Drunken Crowd in Street = Neighbors. As tarragon noted…it’s more likely they threw a big party and it got noisier than intended. No reason to take the reactions of the drunk guests as a refelection on the actual neighbors.
I wouldn’t worry too much. Err…I hesitate to suggest going over and introducing yourself (“hi we called the cops on you”) but if you manage to talk to them as neighbors…might smooth over your anxiety and any bad feeling they have, if there are any.
I’ve been at numerous parties where the cops have been called. Things get out of hand and it kind of gets away from you. Such is life. I’ve never known anyone to carry a grudge about it unless the person who called the cops is being a real asshole, i.e., calling the cops for on a 6-person gathering at 9:00 pm or something.
The drunks probably didn’t tell the neighbor exactly who spoke to them, so they probably won’t even know it was you. I wouldn’t sweat it.
I’ve had to do this on my neighbors across the street a few times over the last six months. Not for parties but for their habit of having enormous fights at 3 in the morning that spill out into the street and are loud enough to wake me up. No retaliation so far.
I called the cops on my neighbors several times for their barking dogs (seperate, for those who remember that awful thread, from my drug-dealing cross-corner people) - the first three times they didn’t know who called them, but the last time I think they did. A few days later I buy a light up palm tree as a Christmas decoration and somebody steals it out of my front yard. Coincidence? The cop who came out to take the report didn’t think so, but we couldn’t prove anything.
In other words, yeah, call the cops first so they don’t know who you are unless you have no recourse. At first I wanted to be nice and neighborly and everything, but hell, I live alone. I’ll be neighborly in the daytime.
Just yesterday, I had a noise-related incident with a new neighbor, who just happens to be black. The family moved in a couple of weeks ago. As usual, I made a point of saying hello, and I’ve chatted briefly with the mother and one of the sons. They seem like nice enough folks.
So, I’m watching the Pats/Jags game, and this “BOOM BOOM BOOM” starts up outside. We’re talking about the kind of noise that vibrates walls here. We’ve had issues with our next door neighbor (our patios face each other) having loud parties in the past, but no-one’s home over there. Hmmm.
Ever the curious one, I go in search of the noisemaker. Turns out one of the new neighbors is working on his car in the garage (against the rules in our condos), and he’s got his mega-bass car stereo blasting away. At a volume that makes shouting a requirement for any kind of conversation. So, I have to shout. “HEY THERE! I CAN HEAR THAT ALL THE WAY DOWNSTAIRS!!! CAN YOU TURN IT DOWN, PLEASE?”
He looks up and acknowledges me, turns the stereo down. I thank him. I wouldn’t call it a confrontation, but I’m worried that this will become an issue in the future. In my experience, noisy neighbors never change their ways.
I’ve had the cops called on my loud parties (years ago, when I was young and dumb) and never held a grudge at all. Hell, it’s not a party until the cops show up!
I don’t know what your fallout will be, Zev, since people can be unpredictable (no! you say), but I just wanted to register my support for you asking them to keep it down. It doesn’t matter if you have to get up the next morning or if you just don’t like noise - when you live in a area with other people, you need to be considerate of them, and your neighbours (and by extension their guests) were not doing that.
When I was young and foolish, and in my first apartment, I had an upstairs neighbor who would do this. After getting tired of knocking on their door and complaining, only to have the music turned back up 15 minutes later, I got pissed and laid my massive cabinet speakers with 15" speakers on their back and let the whole apartment complex shake and roll to Motorhead. We both got the cops called on us, and apart from dirty looks occasionally, I never experienced any sort of retaliation. Your mileage may (and probably would) vary. Don’t use my solution. It was immature and stupid.
I’ll echo what Ogre said. Don’t blast Motorhead through four or five townhouses in order to make your point. For one thing, it would take about three thousand watts; for another, it’ll probably kill that nice Mrs. Simms three doors down.
If you have been neighbors for a year and a half and this is the most worrisome incident to date, my call is, you have wonderful neighbors. Of course you should have asked them to be quieter, and once you were told to call the cops instead, you should have done that too. It’s unclear (in fact, it’s unclear if you even know) whether you were talking to your neighbors, their guests, or passersby who were up and about and attracted to lights and noise that seemed to be a good time. The Great Book of Truth knows that I would be happy to disavow the behavior of some of my guests over the years, and I’ve been known to give rueful consideration to my own on occasion. But I’ve never been tempted to retaliate against someone who objected to either.
It would have been better, of course, to have known them, at least to speak to, to begin with. Neighbors don’t have to be pals to get along; they just need a good grip on the identities of those with whom they need to get along. Best wishes and best of luck.